Schreiben

I've been writing in a little European booklet that was given to me by a coworker who'd been to Germany. It says, at the top, Schreiben ist nur eine Art des Sprechens, bei der man nicht unterbrochen wird." Which means, I think: Writing is just the art of speaking, without being interrupted.

Amen. Interruptions are for the birds. So I have been starting my workday mornings there, with bulleted gratitude and pleasantness. Counting blessings, without being interrupted. I start MY day -- my day belongs to ME, I've discovered, not to Am03na (or any other office), even as difficult as that sometimes is to believe. It's MY day, to begin with gratitude and whatever (coffee, stretching, meditation/prayer sometimes) makes it a GOOD day for me. It took me 41.5 years to learn this.

I haven't been writing much here, as a result. Something about that book feels a tiny bit more sacred to me. Maybe it's because the lights in the office aren't turned on yet, usually, when I write there. All's quiet so it feels more like mine.

The best thing I'm learning lately is that everything is so, so good -- that my life is the awesome big things, Family, Faith, HOME, peace, hope, and not the dumb little things like the workday to-do list or the associated drama. Sure, I have to DO those things, and function alongside them, but they're not my calling. Some big stuff. I've known it, but not been able to tap into it on a daily basis, because it takes work, to keep truth at the forefront of your mind. Especially today with falsehoods and untruths (and drama) coming at us from all directions in the palms of our hands and the Tweets of our feeds. But also because Jobs like to be loud and distracting, and if we don't fight against them, they'll dictate our lives. I'm fighting against that and thankful mine is a job that stays put in its box, in the office, after I leave. I pray never to have a job that WON'T stay in its box.

However, last Friday I had a small taste of what it might be like to work for myself as a freelance writer, at home. MAN, it was nice. I had some work to do -- I had played hooky from work, actually, much to my conscience's dismay -- so I did 30 full minutes of yoga and a lonnnnng savasana (because of the conscience, I was trying to calm myself down), then I sat down to work for an hour or so. I wrote and edited. I turned off the computer. Then I left the house with a bunch of errands to complete before spending the afternoon at school, volunteering until 5:00pm. And YEP, that is definitely how I would like to spend my days if I could. I love being at school, I've discovered, and would like to find more ways to be there, more often.