A fine October morning

(Even though it's a Monday.) 

It's 47 degrees, currently. What bliss! I had to wear a vest-jacket and layers! And socks! Definitely not sandals weather this morning. I live for this time of year. Hot coffee, bathrobe, heavy comforter, fuzzy socks, and sweatshirts: Welcome back! 

As I rev up my work-engine for a very busy week, with a meeting I'm sort-of in charge of, on Friday, and some office visitors T-Th (UGH to all of it), I'm still thinking about this past weekend. We had tickets to the UGA football game and we had such a nice day of it. 

The game was at 7:00 pm, so thankfully we did NOT have to wake up at the crack of dawn to drive there in time. Instead, we had a leisurely morning and left the house around noon. It helped that we didn't have tailgate plans, although in the future, I wouldn't MIND having tailgate plans -- it seems to be a very fun activity for game day and I bet the food involved would be better than stadium pizza. Not to mention having a little adult drink would be nice. 

Anyway, we arrived around 2:30, walked through campus toward the stadium, stopping at a couple of tailgates where we had friends. I had to explain to Kate that there's a code of tailgate etiquette, and that we couldn't simply invite ourselves to join these friends, only stop by to say hello. She was disappointed and so am I, frankly, but you have to have manners. We had places to be, anyway: wanted to catch the Dawg Walk with the band, and see Alex as much as we could when he wasn't required elsewhere. He was very sweet to come and find us whenever he had free time. And the band sounded great and so festive, as usual. 

The weather was just picture perfect. Sunny but cool/breezy, especially in the shade. The game was exciting -- our guys won -- and we hadn't ever experienced a night game before. It's extra atmosphere, for sure. Worth staying out really late and walking what felt like miles to and from our car. 

Afterwards, Alex let us come to dinner with him and several alto-sax buddies including 2 of his roommates. It was simple, not a party or rowdy at all, like you might imagine. These band kids are tired after a full day of being in uniform, and just want some food. ;) I was touched that Alex left the table where he had been sitting to join the three of us instead. 

A lot of little moments, in fact - when he texted to say he had some extra time and could come find us again; when he gave us long hugs; at dinner; some of our conversation about his girlfriend - are evidence to me of how he's maturing. I mean, Alex has never been particularly immature, but it's really neat to watch him change ever so slightly. And it's gratifying that he doesn't mind being with us. He might actually even enjoy it. :) 

We do get to see him again tonight, since the band is coming to our county to perform for a bunch of high school band kids! Yay!

But this morning, I'm trying to hold onto the big joys from the weekend and face whatever "adventure" lies ahead in my Inbox.  

3 Stories, and Dinner Menus for the Week

1. Liver cysts: Back in June, while we were in Destin, Shawn started feeling a sort-of pain in his side. He assumed that he'd pulled a muscle while tossing Kate around in the pool, because she is definitely too old to be tossed at age 12. (She still loves it, though, and he's Fun-Dad enough to do it.) He waited for the feeling to subside but it never did, so finally in mid-August, he went to his primary care doc. She recommended an X-ray and ultrasound, and from that, we got the news that there were some cysts on his liver (who knew?!), and "a 2x2cm mass...." that needed to be further investigated. The news came via a healthcare app, so it was just written, not delivered with any calming guidance from a doctor. And that little word, "mass," when not described as 'probably benign,' or described at all, but just typed out in your record, will make your mind go in the wrong direction. Especially when you schedule the next required thing, an MRI, and have to wait a full week until the appointment. Just about every possibility crossed our minds; me trying to remain positive until we had reason not to be, him feeling the full scope of What If. Understandably. Long story short, the MRI result was better -- just complex cysts, no treatment necessary. But it was certainly an experience. I guess we're in watch-and-see mode now; trying to improve diet by adding fruits/vegetables and fiber, and decreasing fast food. The good thing is, he already has a gastroenterologist to help monitor the situation. 

2. Football: So, Alex's school is playing football, as are all the high schools around here, still surprisingly to me. And the marching band is allowed to play at the home games. They're very socially distanced; they wear masks when not playing (some even while playing, like drums, who don't need their mouths), and they're not wearing their regular uniforms because of handling them and changing in a room together and all that. Of course we want to support the band, so we went to the first game. Masks required. And people were not wearing their masks!! It was just infuriating. The commentator kept saying, in between every quarter, "Fans, please do your part to keep everyone safe: Masks are required at all times. Maintain a safe distance from others. And Go Hoyas!" or something like that.... and still, people sat in the stands and just refused to wear their masks. I can't tell you how annoying it was. We declined to attend the 2nd home game. I'm not sure about the third; it's supposed to be this Friday, but the most recent game was cancelled because of "Covid-19 within the organization." YOU DON'T SAY.

3. Detentions: Ohhhhh, you guys. Kate got 2 detentions for the first time ever. She's not Never been in trouble; in K and 1st, I think, she sometimes got "on yellow" for talking too much, heh. Our little extrovert. But this was 7th-grade trouble. She took her iPod to school (violation #1, devices are not allowed on the premises), and she filmed a TikTok w/her bestie in the girls' restroom, while wearing her uniform with her school's name in huge letters (violation #2). And she posted it. And then, another PARENT reported it. (I'm wrestling with feeling mad about that, and wishing I knew who it was. I have a few suspicions.) She got called in to the principal's office and everything. I'm told she burst into tears. I got to speak with the Assistant Principal for half an hour, and she got her Conduct grade lowered. I feel... bad about it, on the one hand, that we don't have strong enough house-rules that her iPod would have automatically been collected and put away on a school-day morning. But also, she definitely should have known better. The teacher who monitored her detentions was very kind when I picked her up, telling me that it's pretty typical for 7th graders to push limits and try things. We implemented a mini punishment at home, too -- a week without her devices, except for once in the evening to check messages. She wouldn't let me even say the word "detention," she was so uncomfortable with the whole thing. Also part of the punishment, I now check her TikTok every single day. Funny, she hasn't posted a single video since then. 

4. Menus for the week: Before I go into that, we went out to eat on Saturday night! The weather here has been amazing, definitely comfortable enough to sit outside (maybe even slightly too cool), so we took Kate (Alex was away for the night) to the local pizza place. It was so great to be at a restaurant! We wore masks until we sat down, the tables were spread out appropriately, and it felt lovely and normal. I'm not saying we'll do that often, especially not if it gets any colder, but it was a nice treat. This week we're eating at home: 

S - (last night) Chicken Fried Rice (homemade) and egg rolls (from the frozen section). SO easy and good!

M- Maple Glazed Salmon, roasted potatoes and green beans, and French rolls. Family favorite.

T - Hot dogs w/chili, and fries (Tuesdays are my office days and I'm usually wiped out after that)

W - Salisbury Steak,  mashed potatoes, broccoli

Th - Creamy Tomato Pasta (Pioneer Woman), salad

I mean, all of these things are our usual standards, really... I guess because I post so infrequently, it seems like we have the same things all the time. We don't necessarily, but I guess every family has its regular rotation. I should list ours all out, to really see how many different things we typically eat. I sometimes wonder if my family considers me a "good cook," or just an adequate cook. 

F - football game? We'll see.

I hope my 4 readers are all healthy and happy today, enjoying the fall, being productive (or enjoying rest), and feeling content. :)

Spring Break in Seattle

We had a lovely trip to Seattle. For memory's sake:

Wednesday: We arrived so early because we left Atlanta so early! Wakeup time was 2:45 am. (!) Flight took off at 6:15. The airport was a huge part of our excitement, though, since it was the kids' first flight. (not Alex's, but he was 3). They did great in the security check and getting to the gate -- only bad part was not getting any breakfast, but we survived that. Easy flight, if a little long. Kate's device wouldn't download the movie app, so she had to use mine. It was fine though. Landed in Washington around 9:15. First stop, Aunt Jilly's house! To see it, first of all, and to meet our cousin Thomas O'Malley the (alley) cat. ;)

Next, we headed down to the famous Pike Place Farmers' Market, for a delicious chowder lunch and some tourist-level shopping. So fun. In the rain. Afterwards, we stopped at the Starbucks Reserve and Roastary and had a coffee "experience" at the Experience Bar. My drink, a gin-barrel roasted Rwandan cold brew with tonic and lime (!!!) was delicious. We made dinner at home that night, a Sun Basket meal of chili mac with lime yogurt topping and everyone loved it. I'm going to try to recreate it at home one of these days (after May 26 when the WLC ends).

Thursday: Kurt Cobain's memorial park bench on the very anniversary of his death 24 years ago. We didn't quite intend to be there on the exact day, but that's how it worked out. Nearby was a beautiful Japanese Garden that we explored, in the rain. It did rain while we were there! A true Pacific NW week. ;) Lunch was amazing.... lunch was at Din Tai Fung, a Chinese dumpling place. Again, the kids were adventurous (the chili mac the night before was not their usual fare, with quinoa pasta and lots of veggies)... and I was proud of them. We loved it and ate a ton. That afternoon, we toured the Theo chocolate factory. A tad disappointing -- the other time I toured it, we got to walk through the factory itself and even the tasting/confection kitchen. This time not so much. But still, we got good samples and spent lots of dollars in the gift shop! Thursday night we went to a pizza place for dinner. That was a lot of food for one day! We tried watching a movie (Guardians of the Galaxy 2), but none of us could stay awake.

Friday: Bit of a later start, but we were totally fine with that. We took a ferry to Bainbridge Island on the one sunny day of our trip. It was interesting to think that some people take the ferry in to work every day, and home again. Many were eating their home-packed lunches or breakfasts, sleeping, and otherwise bored, while we were taking pictures, exploring the views, and finding it all so interesting. Once we landed, we shopped in the very cute main street area, bought souvenirs, ate ice cream, and enjoyed the weather. (Well, kind-of. Alex was annoyed he'd needed a jacket in the morning, and now he was hot, but knew he'd need it again later on the boat. I agree, that was kind-of tiresome.) Still, an awesome day. Dinner Friday night was.... hm, what was it? Oh yes, Chinook's, a seafood restaurant at Fisherman's Terminal. Delicious. I had salmon tacos. We watched A Man Called Ove.

Saturday: Finished Ove, since some of us had slept again. ;) We had not yet seen the Space Needle, so downtown we went! Got our tickets, spent some time hanging out by the giant fountain while we waited (in the rain), and then went up to the top. Super fun, even if it is under construction until June of this year. We'll just have to go back! After that, the Chihuly Garden and Gallery, which was just the art our eyes and hearts needed in all the grey weather. Loved it. Everyone was hungry so we ate lunch nearby and then home again, home again! Jilly had to sing at Mass, and Kate and I went with her while Shawn did some laundry. For dinner afterwards, we found Bizzaro, a little (really little!) Italian bistro. I loved our conversation that night. Jilly was asking lots of questions about the kids' school. It was yummy and we hated that it was our last meal together!

This update is really bare-bones, despite the large number of words. I just wanted to record some of the details for posterity. :) It felt both really busy/packed, and also relaxed and not stressful. Thanks to Jilly for being the BEST hostess. Kate's probably seriously considering college out there, after we talked about it and UW and Seattle U. Don't know for sure how I feel about that! But I know that parts of all our hearts are still in Seattle, and likely always will be.

Our Spring Break Trip 2018 Begins in 15 Hours...

At 2:45 a.m. tomorrow (tonight) we will get up and dressed, get in the car and drive south for our 4:15 call-time at the airport! Seattle, here we come! Finally! I've been wanting to do this for years. It's going to be SO FUN!


...I don't know that getting up in the dead of night is going to be FUN, exactly, but I'm saying that to keep the positive vibes flowing. But seriously, our flights to/from Seattle are going to be some of the best parts of the trip, according to Kate. First one takes off at 6:15 a.m. and since no one except me has flown on a plane since 2007 (or never, in Kate's case), we're all a bit excited about the experience. (Early morning flights were cheaper and non-stop, so that's why.) We started the packing process last night, which was smart. "Does this need to go in the carry-on?" "No, since that's larger than 3 oz., put it in the checked bag." "Are we checking this bag?" "No, let's carry it on, and then if we arrive at the gate and they're asking people to gate-check bags, we won't have to pay the $25 to check it." "Mommy, can I take this perfume?" "Why do you need perfume? You're TEN. No, that's out." Lots of questions and scurrying around to find quart-sized ziplocs and luggage tags.

But I'm excited that they're excited. It IS kind-of a lot of logistics to get 4 people on a flight. !  Not as easy as traveling solo with just 2 carry-on bags. Papa Joe is here and giving the kids lessons on what happens in the cockpit. I'm trying to explain security as best I can, but really, there's no way to understand it until you do it. I'm grateful, really, that we're going so early in the morning, because I HOPE that will mean the lines aren't quite as long and the crowds not quite as large. We'll see, though.

Once we get to Seattle.... yay!!!! We'll be hanging out with Sissy and her fluffy kitty, Thomas O'Malley, and sightseeing and enjoying a Pacific-Northwest spring (it's forecast to rain every day, woo!). Probably will go to the Space Needle, Pike Place Market, ride the Bainbridge Ferry, and maybe Discovery Park, too. Already booked a tour at the Theo Chocolate Factory in Fremont. :) I've been looking a little bit at visitseattle.org this morning... cutting it close! But also trying to let it be a relaxing vacation, not a sight-seeing extravaganza with every moment planned. I'm hoping for one day that includes brunch out somewhere. I love brunch out.

We're grateful to Mom and Dad who came for Easter, and are staying to kitty-sit! Hee! I do feel a little bad we're going to Seattle without them. But on the other hand, it's good to take family trips, just the four of us, too, and make our own memories. That's what it's all about. Catch you on the flip side!

Work break

I'm taking a small break from the product descriptions I'm supposed to be writing, even though I've not made as much progress as I would have liked today. Oh well. It's such a frustrating process:

1. I find the barest of information from our Textiles designers on a server in Germany (thankfully it's in English -- well, Germish).
2. I copy and paste the basics into the Excel template I need to prepare. Easy step.
3. Based on the Textiles info, I then write the Product Description (at least 75 words), taking care to included proper keywords; the Meta title (65 characters); the Meta description (155-320 characters); and 5 bullet points (Unique Selling Points) for each of 50-100 styles per season, once in fall and once in spring. If I'm lucky, I have a set of physical samples of the products that I can look at to ensure accuracy. 
4. If there are any color extensions of previous styles, I have to add those in. Half the time I don't know where to find out. Check for any particular USPs for new colors; edit meta fields to include correct new colors.
5. Do a huge spell check and format the file correctly.
6. Do a huge Find/Replace from US to UK English (I'm supposed to provide the UK version, even though I live in the US, lol. What's worse is that, once it's uploaded to the US site, the person in charge of the US site doesn't ever change those spellings back, so we have "colours" and "favourites" and "accessorise" which makes me crazy.)
7. Send it off to the e-commerce guy, who doesn't even look over it before he uploads it (I assume).
8. (I don't even know how the translation to German, French, Danish, Spanish, Dutch and all the  other languages takes place.)

After that, I hear all kinds of comments about how this or that isn't accurate, or this style has been cancelled, or this new one has been added in, and I take it all personally, even though I've done my very best.

I both love it and hate it. I love it because it's a good lot of work and keeps me busy, and makes me feel like I know things. I hate it because of everything I said above.

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It helped me to type all that out, so thanks for reading or skimming -- or skipping -- it.

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We spent our Christmas in Savannah. Well, just a couple of days of it. Drove down on Saturday morning, and came back Monday (Christmas Day) in the afternoon. I don't know how I feel about it. It was lovely in many ways -- Christmas Eve dinner around Nanny's table was particularly poignant and nice. 

I do love my mom-in-law and I feel bad for her, she's had a really tough run of it lately. Since about 2013 when my FIL got sick, and probably long before that, to be quite honest. She's so kind and sweet and good. She's got some habits that drive Shawn and me both crazy, and, as is usually the case, they seem to be getting worse as she gets older. She needs help around the house and my BIL refuses to help her, though he lives only half an hour away. We feel like he should be at her house at least a few times a month, especially since October 2016 when Hurricane Matthew dropped a tree on her roof. She hasn't lived in her house since then, until just this past weekend, because we were coming to visit. When we arrived, she and the friends she's been living with were in a frenzy of cleaning. Vacuuming, dusting, bathrooms, mopping -- because of course she hadn't gotten around to it yet. We definitely caught them all off-guard by arriving early, and I know she was trying to make it seem like she was ready all along. 

We presume that she wouldn't have moved back at all if we hadn't said we were coming. And maybe that would have been easier for her, but we thought we were doing the right thing, going to see her out of love and respect. You know? We don't want her to feel unloved by us, or lonely. She can't or won't come up to visit us, for some reason. It's really hard to know what to do, and where it's all going to go next. We probably should plan some more weekend trips to help her put things away (including her mother's things, who died this year, another emotional blow) and/or sell/trash other things... but we also have our own lives here, with plenty to keep us busy on weekends, and not a real huge desire to get involved in her mess down there -- it's not much fun. Of course, we're called, I guess, to GET INVOLVED IN THE MESS, as Christians. God got involved in our mess down here on Earth at Christmas, in fact (I learned that from an Advent prayer program, didn't think of it myself. It convicted me a bit, I'll admit!)... but it's hard. I love you, Shawn, and I love your Mom. I want us to do right by her. It's hard to know what to do, though, isn't it? 

The kids had a good time in the two hours we visited with their little cousins. There wasn't enough time to visit with their Gammy, but I know they were happy to see her. And they enjoyed the opening of presents (Santa made it). Shawn said at one particularly frustrating moment, though, that 'we won't be going down there for Christmas again,' and... I was not sad he'd said it. I'm not sure I want to send the kids to her house for a week in the summer, either; I just don't know that she can handle it, or that they would have a good time sitting in her house mostly, with the secondhand smoke. 

So pray for us, that we know the next right thing.

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It helped me to type all that out.

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We have no major plans for New Year's, except that I get to have Jan. 2 and 3 off work. So next week will only be a 2-day week, hooray! I don't mind working THIS week since I get so much of next week off. I mean, I would RATHER be at home enjoying the rest of the holiday, but I'm okay here. 

Better get back to my descriptions so I can get them done before the deadline (Jan 8).

Memorial Day Weekend: Relaxing, Actually!

We had such a nice weekend. Shawn and I even woke up today saying, "It even felt like a long weekend. Like we had extra time." That's so unusual! We're back at our respective offices, with the kids happily cared for by Carli, who showed up at 7:00 am this morning and who seemed tired, but is still awesome... and I'm still just wanting to re-live all the fun things that happened.

Friday was the last half-day of school, and I happily requested a work-from-home afternoon so that I could pick the kids up on time. There was a birthday party to attend in the park at 1:30, and we'd been asked to drive one of Kate's friends, so we went to Panera for lunch, and then over to the park. It was a perfect, perfect day for it -- sunny but breezy, and not too hot. I loved getting to stand in the shade with the moms and dads while the kids ran around, ate ice cream, and lined up for the pinata. I hadn't been planning to stay there that long, actually, but it ended up just fine since the ol' manager was on vacation. Wink, wink. When we got home at 3:30 I sat down with the laptop and worked for 2 hours, and called it good enough. (I still feel the need to log each hour, and Friday I only worked 6, but I hadn't taken many lunches during the week so it evened out.) **Note to self: I love this kind of flexibility. This job allows it sometimes.** 

Friday night (after Shawn had mowed the grass since he got home early, too), Kate convinced us we needed to go to the pool to celebrate. We knew it would be cold water, because it'd been raining most of the week, but she didn't let that stop her... and the idea of not cooking dinner was definitely appealing to me! I'm glad we went. Even though I annoyed her by not getting into the pool myself (just sitting with my feet in), I think she and Alex had fun. Even Alex admitted, though, that the water was cold. We ate some delicious fish tacos (me) and wings (Shawn), then headed home.

Guess who fell asleep at 9:00 and didn't wake up until 11:00? That's right, Shawn. Not me!

Saturday morning we didn't have piano lessons, which was another nice break. Instead, we got dressed and went to test drive a car! With ice water in our veins, we said. "Just to drive it," we said. But they got us (of course they did) with an offer of $10,000 off a 2016 model. That's four zeroes off. Lucky I'd brought the checkbook just in case. A deal we couldn't pass up, and a car I love! Leather, heated seats! Back-up camera! All the tech I've never had! I had fun driving it a little bit over the weekend, and in to the office this morning.

I had to cantor Saturday night, but had put a pork shoulder in the crock pot all day, so we had BBQ by the time we got home and it was delicious! SO much better than the crock-pot shredded chicken that's been my go-to. Not anymore, I declare. Pork -- the other white meat -- For The Win. Everyone loved it. 

Sunday morning I had to sing again, with the choir, but that's the last time until fall. Hooray! As much as I love our new director Alvin, I am so ready for a break from Sunday morning obligations. Then it was time for a lunch-date with our good friends from when Kate was in pre-school. We haven't seen them in a long while, but the girls just fell right back into friendship as if no time had passed, asking each other about their schools, favorite subjects, friends, etc. Fourth graders! I still think of the two of them as Four-Year-OLDS! Anyway, we had a lovely time at Ted's Montana Grill. One thing the mom said struck me -- she, too, stays in her kinda annoying job because.... drumroll... it is close to her daughter's school. And it pays the bills. We decided it's the way of the world.

[[Is this boring? I'm not sure I even want to finish it. I mean, how could I write the daily details better?! I don't know. I always think LL's posts are so interesting, and they're just like this -- does she insert more personality into it, or something?? What gives?! Photos. Hers always have illustrative photos. Okay... uploading now... does this help?]]

Sunday afternoon, guess what Kate and I did? Went shopping. ;) This is becoming a regular thing, which may not be so good for my bank account, but I think it is definitely good for our relationship. Mostly I was after two errand-y things: Popsicle molds and a new coffee pot. My beloved Black and Decker 12-cup, with its stainless steel carafe, went dead Sunday morning. (I had to boil the water myself, then pour it slowly over the coffee grounds! Not gonna work long-term.) As it happens, the Target is right next door to a Justice, so Kate dragged me in there, too. It's not that I dislike you, Justice, it's just that I despise all the shiny STUFF you hang next to and around your cute clothes. We do not need another fluffy keychain or another tiny purse with a "K" on it! And Kate wants ALL of that stuff. It's really hard, having to be the bad guy in there, but bad-guy I was, denying her a pineapple-shaped boogie board ($29), a third hairbrush (with a K), and a $30 t-shirt with sequins. We did, however, buy a one-piece swimsuit and two pairs of shorts, which she needs for summer camp. And then we went to have our nails done. So I'm still Fun Mom.

I hadn't had my nails done in AGES and AGES, and they needed doing. Kate can't have hers painted during the school year because of the dress code, so this was a big treat. We closed the place down, in fact. But I think she and I need some good girl-time regularly, just the two of us, and now we're all prettied up and ready for summer. The boys played video games, some together and some apart, and you know, I think that qualifies for them as quality time, too.

Can I go on for just another minute? Sunday night we watched Mockingjay #2 (just the grownups), Monday we had no plans, did a little laundry here and there (kids helped), I did my ten-minute workout, Shawn did some work, we cleaned up the Highlander so we can sell it soon, we read books, we napped, it rained then stopped, so we grilled our dinner, and it was just a perfect day off. Nothing fancy or too much trouble.

I'm already counting down until the next weekend.

Snapshots of both kids right now

On a weekend or holiday, if we're in the house, you will likely find Alex and Kate on the couch, on the staircase (seated), or on the chair in the living room, legs dangling over the arm, with their iPads. We knew this would be the case when we gave them the iPads at Christmas, and we know the state of the digital world, so it isn't a shock. But it's still sometimes annoying. Kate fires hers up on the floor of her bathroom sometimes, waiting for the shower to get hot. They watch while they walk. It's mostly YouTube that they're into, but there are also some games. Tap Titans is one that I despise, because its beeps and noises are loud and it requires them to just tap, with all 10 fingers, on the screen. As if they're typing, but they're not, just making ONE MILLION fast taps on the hard surface. They both love Rolling Sky and Word Cookies (at least there's one that engages their academic brains - it's anagrams). Alex is just now texting/messaging with his friends. We let him have a Google/YouTube account (had to fudge his age) so he uses Hangouts, I think, and/or iMessage when the other friend has an iPhone. Kate iMessages me (on days when she's home but I'm working, for example), but to my knowledge, no one else.

After years when we heard nothing BUT the Disney Channel, it has largely disappeared from their TV habits. Thank you, YouTube, I guess! Whereas last summer it was endless episodes of "Walk the Prank," "LIv and Maddie" and "Jessie," they hardly ever put it on channel 864 anymore. Nor Cartoon Network. Farewell, Teen Titans Go, Clarence and Regular Show! We don't mind. Kate has also stopped watching so many episodes of Chopped and Pioneer Woman on The Food Network - they were a staple at one time, as well. If we watch TV lately, it's Jeopardy, The Middle (my favorite, too), or AFV (America's Funniest Videos). Alex likes to see the morning (local, just for the weather) and evening news, too, so we sometimes watch ABC World News Tonight or NIghtly News w/Lester Holt on NBC, on weeknights. Oh, and The Flash. They both love it.

Thank the Lord Jesus, they stopped playing "Baby." This was a game where Kate was the "big sister" of various names, "Riley" (pronounced Raleigh) was the most frequent and Alex, MUCH to Shawn's and my chagrin, was "Baby." He was funny in the role -- quite the actor, really -- but ugh, it was grating. Though there is/was a SONG and other family characters. The MaGoogin family, I believe. I hope they'll remember it always and that I'll rarely have to hear it again. ;) Alex put a stop to it, finally, because he is 12 and acting like a baby isn't cool anymore. They do still pretend a little; "Scooter City" seems to be popular, where they pretend to be Razr Scooter champions on a competitive tour (or something) on the driveway, and sometimes a kind-of spy game in the backyard. This year, they're jumping on the trampoline more.

Most times, playing ends in a fight. Either Kate wants to win (at Horse or "Basket Bounce" on the trampoline) or Alex wants her to follow the rules, or both -- so neither one is getting what he/she wants. It's very hard not to play referee and I usually get myself involved, knowing how badly it will turn out. Oh well. At least they're friends for the most part.

Left on their own, Kate will always want to Make something. Artsy-Craftsy, that one. She'll whine that she wants me to help, and do it with her, but she really doesn't want or need my help. (She wants someone in the room with her.) She has her idea of how a project will turn out, and she goes for it. Alex will want to play video games online. He's found several classmates with PlayStation or Xbox profiles and, as we always knew would happen, this is where he chooses to spend a LOT of time lately. Just this weekend we moved one of the game systems up to the bonus room, so we can have the family-room TV back on Friday and Saturday nights. I'm happy about that but it's also -- gosh, he's getting so grown up. In the back room, door closed. Just like a teenager.

Alex is studious and organized. He'll do his homework on Friday night as much as possible, to get it out of he way for the weekend. He is earning awards in Math and has pretty much maintained a 99 average in every class, pre-algebra included. Math is serving him well in music, too. He's playing clarinet in middle school band. Piano lessons for 2 years and really coming into his own there. He and his teacher had a nerdy conversation about scales and chords the other day (she is a total music theory nerd and I love her for it - I am also enjoying these theory lessons as an observer!). He is rational and kind and he has a great developing sense of humor and timing. He understands so much -- I see in the way that he puts up with his sister, that he's trying really hard to help her, but also knows (mostly) when to back off, and that she just isn't wired the same as he is. His blow-ups over homework have MOSTLY stopped (jinx), but there is the occasional stress-out over a project or a hard problem. He's very excited to be an eighth-grader next fall. In Student Council, by the way. A leader.

Kate is also studious and does very well with schoolwork, but wants it over with as soon as possible.... or leaves it until the last minute - often, the morning of, instead of eating breakfast. Not all homework, mind you, but "finishing touches" on projects. Or, "I want to make a [random] card for X" so it has to be done right this minute. She is still not much of a morning person. She'll be one of those people who can't talk/function until she has her coffee, once she's old enough. She is well loved at school, not just by her own teachers, but everyone. Everyone knows her. All the teachers. The eighth-grade girls. Sweet and funny and outspoken in school, I think. Not in a way that gets her in trouble, just that she knows the answer and inserts herself in grown-up conversations sometimes and it charms people. (And makes me cringe a little since I was NOT that way at her age.) She's in Art Club (and everything else) and her Battle of the Books team won 2nd place in the Archdiocese this spring, for all third grade! Her favorite is still gymnastics - says she wants to BE a gymnast - and she's learned a lot in her tumbling class this year - her form has gotten better. It's not a competitive class and I wonder if I should get her into one, but... not sure I'm willing to be that committed to it. She loved basketball this year, too, but mostly for the social aspect of it. Her team won 1 game. ;) She's trying really hard to control her emotions, and doing better, I'd say 65% of the time. Still a little too dramatic and over-reactive for my taste, but we're all working on it. Oh, and she had her first piano lesson this past weekend.

This is going so fast, this "school years" time of our lives. I really can't believe it. I want to bottle it up and keep it, so I've been meaning to write this post for a long time.

Two best things

Two of the best things my sis and I have done together, lately:
Dad's surprise 70th birthday party 5 years ago, and Mom's less-surprising but also amazing 70th birthday party this past weekend! :)

I'm going to tell you about this weekend. We had fun surprising Mom via email, that we both planned to come to Florida to celebrate with her. We knew she wouldn't want us to just show up one Saturday, especially if she already had plans for a pedicure or a DAR meeting or something, and then bring 25 people to her house with no warning. So we told her in August, I think. Something to look forward to!

We made lots of yummy food after a fun sisters' grocery-store run (and liquor-store run) Saturday morning:

• Sweet Potato and Bacon skewers -- as delicious as they sound! Sprinkled w/a brown sugar and cayenne mixture that gave them just the perfect level of sweet/spice! 
• Maple-Bacon Crack -- also delicious and decadent... but these weren't as crispy as the recipe promises. They were soggy and sticky, in fact, and we didn't serve all of them.
• Green salad w/cranberries and spiced pecans
• Veggie tray w/hummus AND Ranch, because we're just that crazy
• Fruit and Cheese
• Meat and Crackers
• Rotel dip and chips (it's not a party without them)
• Turkey Roll-ups w/cream cheese
• Frozen Mini Corn Dogs for the kids
• Cake!

And our signature drink, an Apple Pie Moscow Mule that you must try! So delicious! I could have had three of them, I think! (I only had one.) And I'm not usually a MMule fan, I'll admit. But these were light and delicious (apple-flavored vodka!) and now I need my own set of copper mugs!

Of course, it's not all about the food. (Most, but not all.) ;) We had fun with Mom and Dad's friends from next door, our awesome cousins and their spouses, our favorite aunt and uncle, and all of the next generation, too. I feel like I was a sweaty mess (working in the kitchen and chasing the youngest kids), but I had fun. Only person I didn't get a chance to talk with was (as usual) Shawn. We laugh about that a lot, after parties. But then again, I guess we talk to each other most days so it's cool. ;)

Sunday morning the kids got a quick swim in, in the backyard, and then we had to head home. Weekend, you were too short!

But I've been thinking about Time, this morning, after a little stress last night when Kate couldn't fall asleep and I got frustrated because of it. I realized I rely so heavily on my carefully calculated schedule to get through weeknights, that when my plans/schedules get disrupted, it causes me stress. But if I could just LET GO of my arbitrary rules about time, I'd be better off (and a better mom). Because all time is limited... and all time is also infinite. We have nothing but time. Sure, it HELPS me to get a full night's rest (I really like getting 7 hours exactly)... but if my lunchbox-prep gets pushed later than I'd like, for whatever reason, it's not going to kill me (unless it becomes a bad habit)... I should let time run, do what needs doing, in whatever time it takes, and just TRUST that God will give me what I need to get through being tired the next day. For example. I have more thinking to do about this, but it is a welcome insight.

Anyway, our time together over the weekend was much too short, but it was just what it was meant to be, and what we were given, and therefore it was perfect. :)

Love you, Mom. Happy birthday tomorrow.

Sunny springtime, 6 pm in the backyard

I've just got to capture, for future-me, the immensely happy feeling I had yesterday, and all the past weekend, before I forget it. It will fade away, guaranteed, with all the things that will happen between now and the future.

It wasn't any grand adventure or big event. It was just us. Just a very unplanned, no commitments weekend in spring - the kind I love best. In fact, I was SO spontaneous that late the week before, I texted the mom of a friend of Kate's, to ask if she could spend the night. And she could! So I drove her home with us after school on Friday and the two girls were very happy. They were so BUSY in Kate's room -- creating an "office" in her closet, and their "business," and asking me to come shop at their store, complete with pretend money. They drew/colored the paper money and cut it out themselves. They stayed up until nearly midnight. I let 'em. Kids love doing those kinds of "dangerous" things when it's a radical night like a sleepover, right? :) I was happy to let them. (Honestly, I snoozed on the couch while they watched multiple episodes of Disney sitcoms.)

Saturday I woke up and made just-add-milk-easy muffins for them, then left! Haircut and color. I hope Shawn wasn't upset with me for leaving him with the extra kid, but it had to be done. I have a feeling they played better without me there. Kate still tends to need me to be with her. We took Reese home Saturday afternoon and then went out for dinner at our new favorite BBQ place. So yummy. We played frisbee in the backyard afterwards, AND jumped on the trampoline. That's where the magic started -- our backyard. These spring nights have been just perfect. Low humidity, lots of sun, cool breeze, no pollen, no bugs. I mean... right?? We had to have dinner outside on Sunday,  because I couldn't be kept away from that weather. (Chicken fajitas, yum.) And we played more frisbee and then the kids trampolined some more while I sat, enjoying their giggles and the breeze. I called Mom and Dad.

Other little things making me happy:

• We bought outdoor pillows for the front porch bench and chairs and they're a lovely little touch I didn't realize we needed. I love them (red, of course).
• While we still haven't extended the back porch or fixed the fence, I think our backyard is looking great and inviting, thanks mostly to Shawn's hard work (with Alex's help) to plant some azaleas and lillies, and lay a brick border. And my firepit. :) All that it needs are four $20 chairs from Target.
• Monday, today, I have been able to hold onto this Filled-Up-With-Sunshine-&-Family-Time feeling. I've really really worked at staying filled up (still am). Not letting the office burst my bubble, no sir!
• One funny thing: I managed to do some yoga last night before the kids went to bed. However, while I was trying my new pose (Fish pose - not too hard, surprisingly, but in fact I AM rightly sore from it this afternoon)... in the living room next to me were three different soundtracks: Shawn's video game - gunshots mostly, rapid-fire; Kate's YouTube video - no headphones so I could hear the guy's British accent distinctly; and Alex's YouTube video he was watching -- same British YouTube gamer guy, different episode, also no headphones. I was trying to find my zen inside my head. [[big eyes of wonderment]]

Gifts we've given Hailey (so I don't repeat)

--age 1 birthday: Ball Popper!
--age 15 months Xmas: Melissa and Doug cookies set
--age 2 birthday: Disney Baby Princess. It was Aurora (pink).
--age 2.25 Christmas: Build-a-Bear pink bear with outfit
--age 3 birthday: Princess Cupcakes stacking game and Color Wonder markers set (princesses)
--age 3.25 Christmas: Sofia the First puzzles, clothes.

4 More Days...

Have I mentioned how much I MISS ALEX??? A lot. Alot, a lot. I want him back home with us, and I'm glad there are now only 4 more days until he will be here to request taco night and stare at his DS for hours on end. We, of course, have seen plenty of the aforementioned happy-kid pictures (refresh.... refresh), and even received a postcard from him, so I know he's enjoying himself. But still.

We had a nice week last week, and I had a nice 41st birthday. I was determined to enjoy the heck out of my day, even though it was a workday. Because we were "slow-living," Kate had time to kick me out of her room for a minute before breakfast ("I need to ... do something, Mommy..."). When she emerged, she had hidden behind her back a homemade birthday card, made with a gray marker on loose leaf paper. So sweet. She signed it, "Kate Kate," since I'm still allowed to call her that... occasionally. The weather was cool and cloudy, just the way I like it. Shawn gave me a gift card to the spa, which I want to schedule ASAP. For lunch, I had a bologna sandwich. That was funny. I was trying not to feel sorry for myself that all my co-workers, who might've taken me to lunch, were away in Europe. And I didn't. Actually, I'd rather they all be away in Europe, ha! So that was actually a gift. My manager even had flowers sent -- a yellow begonia plant that I hope I won't kill with my black thumb. The colleague who bought/delivered it told me she chose it because the color was bright and cheery, like me. Hahahaha! I laughed and said, "I hope so! Some days!" but what a compliment! A gift, to be told I'm seen that way, when I certainly don't feel like I project "cheer" around the office! After work and gymnastics camp, we went to dinner at the local delicious Cajun place and ate until we felt sick. (I think this is good?) There were both a molten lava chocolate cake and a pink vodka drink.

The rest of the week was equally fine. Kate enjoyed her time at gymnastics camp, I think, and made a new friend, who lives in our neighborhood! On Friday evening, the two of them played in the cul-de-sac and I met the parents. We exchanged cell phone #s so now we're friends, I guess. ;) It's great for her to find someone to play with! I hope they'll make lots of memories together. Tuesday evening, Kate and I swam at the Country Club. Just to check it out, you know. It was good! I accidentally talked to another mom, just for a minute, after her son looked like he might drown and I offered him a hand. She seemed nice. We intended to go back yesterday, but after a sleepover, Kate was invited to swim at their country club instead. The fancy-pants one, to which it seems a lot of her classmates' parents belong. She had fun and was well worn-out last night, crying spectacularly at bedtime to prove it.

This week (it's Monday, boooo), more of the same. Except the coworkers are back and so I'm  fast-living again. ;) Meh. Not complaining. Work, Shmerk, right? Type type type and act happy and collect the money (and carefully monitor the interesting "Senior Copywriter - Virtual" job op I've recently seen) ....and go home to the actual life. It's all one reality, but the good part is clearly good. No need to dwell on the other.

Anniversary

Fourteen is my lucky number.

And on this day, fourteen years ago, right now, I was having my hair done for my role as THE BRIDE. What a lucky girl I have been, then and now.

This morning I woke up, gathered up my gift and card to take downstairs to the kitchen table to leave waiting for him, when he got up. Of course, he had already beaten me to the punch, and I found a gift bag with my name on it right by the coffeemaker, where he knew I would see it. Two beautiful new charms for my Pandora bracelet, exactly the ones I was hoping for. (He's been filling up charm bracelets for me since we started this gig, the first one being a tiny diamond-ring-shaped one, the night he proposed.)

I don't know how to say all the things I feel about our marriage and our relationship, and they're not the things for a blog anyway, really, but this morning I am definitely thinking about us, reading the tales and memories I've managed to capture, and how it has been so perfect all these years. I want to bathe in it. I feel secure in it.

You still make me laugh. You make me smile (even when I don't want to). We go well together -- work, play, tedious or exceptional days. That's love, that's marriage. That's all there is to it. xo

Shawn & Lee

Est. 4.28.01

Email Eliz. and other random things

I left a note in my work To-Do notebook last Friday afternoon: "Email Eliz." -- with the check-box-shaped bullet point I use to indicate tasks.

Monday, and still today, I have no idea who "Eliz." is, or what she needs from me in an email. I really don't. There is no Elizabeth in my immediate circle, and no one I can think of in my work circle. Mystery!

The mind is strange, I tell you, and getting older is even stranger.

* * * * *

We had a delightful weekend, with Mom and Dad arriving Friday afternoon to celebrate Mom's birthday. They are so good and generous to drive up here for us. They think it's a gift to themselves, to come see their grandkids, but it's really a gift to Shawn and me. I truly, truly wish we had more time to drive to THEIR house for regular visits, but we have to just be, and accept what is. So we can't go there as often as we would like. That is the reality, and it's okay. So I'm just grateful that in their retirement, they don't mind a weekend road trip or four, per year. :) We talked about Thanksgiving, and I think we'll go to Pensacola then, so I'm happy about that. It will be a luxurious three-and-a-half days there, something so precious and rare.

We celebrated with a new (to them) Mexican restaurant and a very lime-y guacamole on Friday night.... and crashing on the couch later.... then with a lazy, gray Saturday (well, lazy after doing a quick volunteer job at school, and excluding Shawn, who had busy Cub Scout duty).... a Cajun dinner out with Uncle Jim and loud music and so much fooooooood..... and crashing on the couch later..... and then Sunday Mass with a Mozart solo I was proud of, and happy to be able to share with my Most Importants.... and some shopping, just the girls. Shopping is fun and I don't do it often enough. We didn't even venture into any grown-up ladies' stores, only Gymboree, since Kate was determined to have a new outfit by the end of the outing. We did have fun in the Yankee Candle store, as well.

What I remember about shopping with Mom when I was Kate's age, is the grown-up stores. Mom trying on things in the fitting rooms. And then, going to the kids' sections and trying on clothes. Kate doesn't do much of that yet. I can be pretty sure that the 5s or 6s will fit her. But someday, we'll do more shopping, and do it right. And have a latte afterwards. :)

Oh, and one other milestone, we had our first meal and birthday cake in our new house's dining room. I was happy about that, and so happy that it was spacious! No squeeeeeezing around the table like we used to in our old house! Plenty of space to move out a chair, sit down, get up to grab something from the kitchen, take photos...! Dining room is christened!

* * * * *

Today (Thursday) I'm fighting a cold, ugh. How luxurious and wonderful it would be to take a sick day, and fight a cold from my bed, using my new book (Jodi Piccoult's The Storyteller) and several naps as my effective weapons. Sigh. Do people my age do that anymore, ever?

I guess DayQuil is effective, too.

Success w/pajama walking

Just reporting in: Last night we convinced Kate to try everything on the list. No dessert after dinner, no screentime after dinner, and a pajama walk. She went to bed and didn't get out until this morning. The pajama walk was awesome, even thought it started raining pretty hard at 7:50 pm, right as we were putting on our shoes to head out the door. We waited just a few minutes for it to stop and thankfully, it did. Just a pop-up. (One of my favorite childhood memories is of a late-evening walk my family took after a rainstorm once. I think we saw a rainbow, even -- I can still picture the way the sunset and clouds looked. I go back to it often.)

Anyway, we saw a family with three young kids. Didn't stop to chat, just said hello, but maybe next time. They were splashing in puddles. At first I was adamant that we all stay together and go slowly, but Shawn convinced me to let Kate go on ahead. And he's right -- her mind was wandering without us and I bet that helped wind her down, even though she was doing more skipping and running than I thought she should.

We still didn't get her to lights-out until 9:05, so we'll work on that. But I am encouraged.

Frisbee

I can't remember when or why we started playing Frisbee with the kids; I mean, we always had frisbees around, I guess, because people like to do them as giveaways and, for whatever other reason. (From my own childhood, I remember ordering a free one from the back of the Frosted Flakes box, with my Dad. It was a very important endeavor to 6-year-old me; I remember keeping the Proofs of Purchase and putting them in the envelope. The frisbee was white with Tony the Tiger on the front (orange, obviously), and I also remember how quickly he faded. But that was our family frisbee.)

At the house we just left, the hilly, uneven and tree-covered lawn meant that the best place to play was the driveway. It... wasn't ideal. One person stood near the garage on the "down" part of the slope, and the other person was near the street on the "up" part. But we played pretty often. Especially as Alex started growing into it, instead of flinging the thing directly into the ground, or under an overgrown tree. It was easy to teach, even for someone like me who knows nothing about frisbee-throwing -- at least I knew to say, "Use your wrist" and "Face your target." Or something like that. I was always worried about skinned knees, but I don't think frisbee ever caused one.

We're lucky, living in the climate we do, that lots of days of the year are good for it. So we'd play, on the driveway, sailing it straight to and fro, grumbling when it rolled under one of the cars, or out into, then across, the street, or under the azaleas. Kate learned, too (or, is learning). We'd count to see how many times we could throw and catch without dropping it. I think Alex and I got up to 12 or 13 once.

I really like it because it's one of those things like a Dad and son throwing a baseball. You can talk or not talk. But the opportunity's there.

One of the things we love about our new house is the backyard -- for lots of reasons. Of course I want to "decorate" on the patio -- even extend the patio -- and there's a firepit in the way-back woods, that I'm excited about. But the main "living area" is a large square, basically -- flat and grassy. No trees except on the perimeter. And so when the weather this week was in the 70s -- in JULY -- we knew it was time. After dinner (and right after Shawn had cut the grass, which was so nice), no humidity, no mosquitoes.

Such freedom!! To throw diagonally, one of us in each corner, or go all the way around -- it's a surprisingly huge improvement. We can run to catch it, jump without worrying about scraped knees, and really FLY the thing. I was just amazed at the difference, after throwing "uphill" so long.

It's not that big of a deal, but I'm excited about frisbee. The prospect of fall weather. The idea of getting exercise -- but playing. The built-in stress relief. The idea of having little family "competitions." (Last night, our 2nd night in a row, we determined when to go inside by saying, "When we get to 10 'errant' throws, we're done." It was fun! And funny!) The popsicles afterwards. ;)

Just the picture of us out there together in the fresh air. It's total bliss.

Things that were fun this weekend

• Friday night dinner was Alex's choice, after his long 2 weeks away from Mommy's table: Taco Night!
• Saturday morning: Haircut/color/shampoo/style for me. Glad I got started at 9:00 am so I could finish early.
• Saturday evening: Cantor at Mass, then dinner (free! thanks to a giftcard from a sweet Uncle Jim) at Applebees. I let myself coast and order whatever I wanted. Which happened to be a salad, but I also loved our Potato Twists appetizer.
• Saturday night: Kate wanted to show Alex a movie that she apparently likes a lot: "Escape from Witch Mountain." It's from 1975 and creeps me right out (when it isn't boring me), but she's watched it twice in the past week! She wanted Alex to see it, too. (He fell asleep.)
• Sunday morning: Breakfast out AGAIN! This time with both kids. Mmm, gouda grits.
• Sunday afternoon: Shopping (the whole family!) at Kohl's. Got kids a couple of things they needed, and Daddy, too.
• Sunday afternoon (later): A quick card tournament (Blink). What a fun game! Easy for everyone, and FAST. This is very good for the parental-types among us. It's over-with quickly, and then the kids went to watch Gremlins. Haha! So many GenX old movies!
• Sunday evening: Lemon-basil pasta for dinner. So yummy and summery. And the kids loved their version, and ate their broccoli, too.

So it was a very good weekend, after all. I'd been thinking the opposite*, but all it takes is a little gratitude and blessing-counting to really see what's true.

*A couple of things threatened to ruin my mood. (okay, maybe they did ruin my mood over the weekend at various times). One, our upstairs AC drain pan overflowed, leaving a nice leak/hole in the master BR ceiling. Two, I was really impatient with the kids/Kate. The constant ASKING and NEEDING! Arrrrrgh! Again, my default mode with them/her seems to be "you're bothering me." I am such a work in progress and it's taking God a really long time to get through to me on this one. Three, it was hot after we turned the AC off. Four, the work is neverending. Shawn and I both feel like we can never just sit in our home and relax. There's always the guilt that we should be cleaning/fixing//laundering/doing.I want to remedy this feeling. We need and deserve to enjoy more of our life. :/

Going back up to re-read the bullet points again.

There was a surprise party

...and it wasn't even a result of my impolitely requesting one right here on this blog.

Evidently, my Darling Husband began thinking about this, and told my parents to plan for it, LAST year around my birthday. He is so smart. And kind. And good.

Through all the stress of moving he has also been coordinating this.

It was wonderful, of course. He rented a space, even, and sent Evites to my friends for whom he had to go digging up email addresses. Even if I HAD known about it, which I did not, it was still SUPER surprising to see friends gathered at the top of the stairs, yelling, "Surprise!" (I laughed and burst into tears, naturally.) There were girlfriends from our kids' school (it's hard to know what to call these friends, btw; "school friends?" No... "Mom friends?" I don't know. Anyway, my current girlfriends whose kids attend my kids' school. Ha.), previous job friends, current job friends, friends from college (!), and Mom and Dad peeking through the crowd to ultimately surprise me all the way from Florida.

I.

Loved.

It.

There are only a few instances in life when a person gets to feel so beloved and special, and I'll float on this high of knowing people "like me, they really like me," for a long time to come. And anytime after that, if I'm feeling down. I'll never forget it. Black "Over the Hill" signs and all. I'm so happy for Shawn for pulling it off! He didn't tell the kids, so they were confused/surprised, as well, which I think is so fun. I racked up a lot of bottles of wine! Wooo! But really, more important, I was so, so happy. It was perfect.

So, hello FORTY. You're looking great so far.


*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *


This week, summer has hit full stride. I mean, it's been stupid-busy since the kids got out of school because of the move. We haven't had a "regular" summer week yet - and maybe we won't at all, this year. Last week was hijacked by two things: One, I had a 2-day meeting on the other side of town, for which I stayed in a hotel, Monday-Tuesday. It felt really weird to have just moved into the house and then pack a bag to spend the night away from everyone, for work. (The meeting itself was mostly awful/boring, to boot.) Tuesday while I was away, Kate had a fever/headache and had to stay "home" from camp, i.e., at the office with Daddy. Wednesday she seemed to feel better, and it was a swimming day for her, so she went to camp. But that evening she was feverish again, so I kept her home with me TH, took her to the doc and she was diagnosed with strep. So we worked from home together again on Friday.

THIS week, Alex is at his Comic Book Art & Manga camp at KSU. I'm so excited for him, ...and apprehensive. He's really wanting to learn some drawing techniques and loves everything about Manga. I know that if there are other kids in the class who are already excellent artists, he's going to feel "less than." This is just the way he is. But I hope, hope, hope he'll enjoy it and do well, and learn. We've had the "don't compare yourself to others" discussion but it's a tough lesson to ever learn (pretty sure I haven't fully learned it yet; pretty sure most adults never do).

NEXT week, they're off to Pensacola for a week with the grands and cousins. Then: BEACH WEEK!

Many reasons June is my favorite. ;)

Stage mom

Tonight is Kate's first singing solo. She was asked several weeks ago, after sitting near the drama teacher at our school, to sing the special solo before the middle school musical -- apparently this is a thing they've started doing, where they ask a younger kid to warm up the audience with an awww-worthy song. Last time it was a first-grader. I've not told everyone I know at school for fear of sounding braggy, but yesterday her teachers asked her to stand up and tell the class her big news. So today I've been getting messages from the moms, saying, "Sienna said Kate's singing tonight at the play? Is she?" Hee hee. I'm in heaven. I'm so excited for her. And nervous for her. And all of the feels! And Grandmommy and Papa Joe, I promise to take video.

Hosting, and other notes

I think I'm going to get to host something Christmas-y this year. Well, besides Christmas dinner and the Christmas/New Year's Holidays -- we're already hosting those. :) I am so happy. I think it's the perfect plan: Grandmommy and Papa Joe arriving on Christmas Day. It's actually our first Christmas (Santa) morning in our own home, with no guests. That, in itself, is exciting and a small blessing, I think. Having guests is lovely, too, but I'm happy about it just being us. And then later in the day, we'll have our favorite guests-who-aren't-guests, but who are family, to join us for a real Christmas Dinner, and the rest of the fun stuff about the holidays: sitting around, watching movies, enjoying time off, playing with new things, reading new books, napping, chatting, drinking yummy beverages and eating cookies. ;)

But BESIDES that hosting, I think I'm going to get to host my little group of mom buddies, next Friday night. Another woman had volunteered, but one of our group is allergic to cats (so am I), and she asked if we could not go to that friend's home. (No offense.) So I volunteered. It's an easy potluck and BYOB, so as long as I can keep the place relatively straightened up, and it's already pretty straight because of Christmas decorating, I'm good to go. I love this group of girls, and like Swistle said, I definitely feel like it solidifies my place among them to host something. I've been wanting to -- I don't know why I don't ever send that email to INSTIGATE a get-together. Maybe after this I'll feel like I can.

I would love to do a "whole families" party, too, and not just the moms -- but I just don't think our house is big enough for that. Not in the winter, when the back deck is unavailable. This is yet another reason I'd like to try to find a new home. I really like having parties, and being stifled by the lack of space is hard.

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The "other notes" are harder. We're still having a hard time with Kate. That's all I want to say. I wish I could make it funny, like all the bloggers do. I wish I could laugh and say, "She's like a tiny drunk, one minute saying one thing (GET ME A SNACK!), and then next minute, the exact opposite (NO! DON'T TOUCH MY SNACK BOWL!"), and expecting me to believe both hahaha, isn't it hysterical, how illogical they are!" But it has become less funny. I'm seriously considering the question, "Where would I even buy a lump of coal?"  (...was that funny?)

Bless her. I pray for her so much. I pray for me. She gets her flaring temper from both her father and, I've learned, from me. I pray for Alex, who loses out. I pray for Shawn who has to deal with her irrational emotions, and then feel bad for mine. I have extremely HIGH expectations of my kids because that's the standard I was raised by, and I met it. I WAS A PERFECT CHILD. ;) (Really, I was.) I wouldn't have DREAMED of telling my mother she was stupid or bad or any of the things Kate says to me on a daily basis. But I need to let GO of those expectations. Every single one.

And yet, she's still so sweet when she decides to be. Today there was a glimmer of hope when she apologized to me for "being bad," with no prompting (that I know of). That's a tiny speck of hope. (and also breaks my heart)

I've said too much. Just... Mom, say a prayer for us. Say a prayer that this will be the worst of it and the teenage years will be a breeze. PLEASE, say that prayer. Because, Jesus.

So I'll remember

I don't do photo albums much anymore. I feel extreme guilt about it. I really, truly want to do photobooks, and maybe I should make a goal of catching up in 2014. But at least I will have snapshots in words to help me look back at the beautiful things in my life.

• Kate losing her first tooth. We're (Mom and I) hanging out in the kitchen on Saturday, she's watching TV in the den. She calmly walks over to us and says,"Look what I did." And shows me a tiny little bloody tooth in her hand. Her purple and pink tooth pillow had JUST arrived the day before from Etsy. Whew!
• Alex and Shawn going on yet another Cub Scout campout. This time on an aircraft carrier, the Yorktown, where they slept in bunks stacked 4 high, with barely enough room to roll over between them. Might have been better than sleeping in a tent, but not much. I know they're going to treasure the memories they made together in Charleston, even if the time spent there wasn't all roses and unicorns (or, in their case, it wasn't all gunfire demonstrations or cool programming or soft mattresses). I know that this time with his dad is the best foundation for Alex's heart and will make him an amazing man and (hopefully) father one day, too. I can't wait to see the seeds Shawn's planting someday grow big and strong. 
• I mean, I CAN wait. Slow down, time. But it will be a satisfying sight.
• Another volleyball state championship game for my cousin, Amber, a junior. This year, it was a loss. (Last year, a win.) Seeing her all grown up, but still so young. High school doesn't feel that long ago when I'm there, and I know it won't be long before my kids are in that amazing time of their lives, too -- it's one long mind- and time-warp-trip, going to her games. It felt appropriate that she had to learn the agony of defeat this year. Tough on her, but made me proud of her. And here's hoping her senior year brings a come-from-behind, satisfying victory.
• Quiet afternoons with MY Dad, doing our 'project' -- a word that has bonded us since childhood, when he'd wake me on a Saturday with "Lee... got a project for ya..." -- in the very definition of a companionable silence. (We painted the deck rails.) The fall sunlight was perfect and there was even a nice breeze sometimes, and we shared a comment here or there, about a dog barking, or about Kate wandering off to play with the neighbors, or about our paint running out. It was hard work, on one hand, and easy work on the other hand. Something about the meditative action of painting, too -- whitewashing -- was calming. I enjoyed being in those moments, so much.
• Kitchen table with my Mom. There's nothing better. Our adult friendship is built on the kitchen tables.
• Easy, but big, beautiful family dinners. I mean, a frozen lasagna. A Caesar salad. Garlic bread. There's nothing fancy about it, but for sure pulling the extra leaf out from under the table, and gathering around it, is one of life's biggest blessings.