News and Tidbits

Another weekend, another sleepover.

I try not to say no to those, because I have such happy memories from sleepovers when I was young. My favorite ones were when both Jill and I went to the McWhorters' house, or to our cousins' house, each also having a set of sisters. But I also loved spending the night at Melissa's house, Nikki's house, and Marybeth's in high school. 

This weekend it's a girl from Kate's basketball team who has never been over before, but is very sweet from what I can tell. So yay! Except that: 

• Friday at their school is a half-day (monthly faculty meeting), so they'll have to come to my office or else I'll have to beg another WFH afternoon. My boss has been consistently kind about those lately, but it always makes me nervous to ask, again
• my solitary Saturday-morning coffee time will likely be interrupted. Not huge in the grand scheme of things (maybe I'll just get up earlier?), but it is a kind-of ritual that helps me feel like myself
• and finally, the weather is supposed to be bad this weekend so they'll be stuck in the house with no basement and thus, not very far to go to entertain themselves. 

Now that the complaints are lodged, I should say that I'm happy about it, happy she has friends (and last week it was Alex's turn, so it's fair), and I enjoy feeling like "fun Mom" once in a while.

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This morning the United Methodist Church news is on my mind quite a bit, having, as I do, no fewer than 5 Methodist ministers (and many more Methodist friends) in my college friends-list. Emory is a Methodist university and has a well-regarded theology school associated with it, not to mention its "preacher's kid" tuition discount, which brought many a Methodist student into my life. :) Plus, I love the Methodists; sang in their choir as a very small child and went to their pre-school, even. I especially loved when we visited their church some Sunday mornings, and I got to go to Sunday school! Catholic churches didn't have that and it was so cool to me.

Anyway, their #GC2019 news is sad for many congregants, and I feel for them. But the thing it brings home for me, and what I want to tell my dear Methodist friends is that, once again, we've learned that the Church is a human institution, and thus a flawed one. Who runs the Church/churches? Humans.  So, my feeling is, it's never going to be perfect, and simply can't be. I've learned as a Catholic (over and over again, unfortch) that you just have to kind-of shrug your shoulders, appreciate what you learn from the institution, and accept what it is. I mean, in the case of the Catholics, we have to also be very mad and disgusted and feel hopeless sometimes, too, but mostly we have to continue on. We  separate our own personal faith from the deeply-flawed humans who manage the business of faith. I still stay Catholic in spite of it  (probably because I'm lazy). It's home; besides that, it's a tradition rich with meaning and depth. I like that there's always more to study and learn and question. 

I don't agree that you can't be a "cafeteria Catholic," following some rules or believing some things, but not others. Yes, you can. It's flawed, by definition. I have a mind. You do, too. Our thoughts can be as true - and as flawed - as the church leadership's, but they're no less worthy of thinking. There's room for all of us.

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In related news, sort-of, Shawn and I were asked to be godparents! We've never been godparents together before, so this is exciting! Each of us has one other godchild, but now we'll have little Charlie, our next-door neighbors' 8-month-old, and we are so honored to be asked. They had us to dinner and asked in an awkwardly sweet lull in the conversation. We don't know them all that well yet, but I'm so excited to GET to know them better. And be linked in this special way.

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Final newsworthy item, next week I go to Austin for a tradeshow. I'm looking forward to it and hope it helps me feel some new enthusiasm for my company's work. I could use a shot of enthusiasm, heh.

House; and summer panic

One thing that makes me sad about our move back in 2014 is that we couldn't find a house with a finished basement. I mean, one never expects to find ALL of the things that one wants in a house, I know that. But we gave up a lot of our wish-list items because by the time we found our house/neighborhood, we'd seen SO MANY wrong houses already, and ours was under contract and time was ticking.

We had seen a lot of larger houses, with basements... but they all needed a lot of work. Like, old ugly kitchens, plus needing to renovate the basement, plus paint. Or, newish kitchen, but terrible carpet/floors/bathrooms. We're not very good at working on houses, as it turns out. We were wary of buying something that we'd always want to renovate (but never get around to).

So we are grateful for our house and neighborhood, yes. It was move-in ready and in good shape. But 1) a basement/media room (more space in general) and 2) the master or a guest room on the main floor were things we really did want, and still don't have.

Kinda a bummer. I'm not sure why I'm thinking about that today.

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One of the things I think I'm terrible at, is medium-term planning. Long term, we're finally doing okay, although we have some paperwork we owe our financial planner this week. But medium-term, the time it takes to, say, plan a trip -- or plan summer -- is hard. Summer 2019 is looming, and we have a teen and a pre-teen who don't need a babysitter but don't need to be sitting around on YouTube all day long. They're going to their 2-week, no-devices camp in early June. But what else? What will they do after that?

I tell you I am so weary of setting up summers.

One of my church friends is looking for a very part-time, like one day a week for a couple hours a day, babysitter for her grandson. I think Alex would be great at it; he's good with kids. Is he interested? That I don't know. Should he think about getting another, "real" job? He'll be 15, but not until July. Most things I'm reading say you really need to be 15 to be hired, and even then, it's slim pickings. So maybe babysitting is it? And what, pray tell, will I then do with Kate on those days?

I'm considering a request to work from home one day every week during the summer, for a start. Maybe I can find a pool and take the kids one day a week? I just seriously don't know. I can't deal with the thought of them doing NOTHING.

When I started thinking about summer, that got me thinking about driver's ed. Should Alex be taking that this summer? From what I can see online (today), in our county the 30-hour classroom course is only offered in April or May. He won't be 15 yet, so does he take that the following year, before he gets his actual license? But he has to pass a written test for his permit, at 15... panic panic panic I need a book to give him to study in the meantime, I guess, and how in the HOW am I supposed to teach a kid how to drive? What if I don't do it right? What the heck??? My kid is old enough for me to be thinking about this?

Musicals! Revisiting the me of my teens

I finally listened to "Hamilton" about a month ago. I'm about 4 years late, I realize. It is so good. I want to hear every. single. word. when I have it on. It has made me want to revisit all the musicals I used to love, so today I pulled out my London cast recording of CATS. Ha!! An oldie but a goodie. I had forgotten about the Jellicle Cats and Jennyanydots and Bustopher Jones. My other favorite soundtracks, from back in the day, included:

• The Phantom of the Opera (which I had on cassette)
• A Chorus Line (ditto, a recorded copy)
• Les Miserables, of course - any theater kid must
• Guys and Dolls (THE BEST musical of all time, imho)
• Little Shop of Horrors - dream role, Audrey
• Godspell - when I'm feeling spiritually moved
• Into the Woods - dream role, Cinderella, the end makes me cry 
• Sunday in the Park with George - also makes me cry

Maybe I'll listen to a few of those this week, too. The "well-being" challenge this week on the WLC is to listen to music, 1 song a day at least, that "moves you." Pretty fun.

Day to day I typically just listen to Sirius radio in my car, and a lot of times I prefer either the Symphony channel or Spa. Calming. No lyrics to get in the way of thinking. Sometimes I put it on the Broadway channel but I don't know a lot of the more recent stuff that they play. Then, once the kids are in the car, they flip between Hits 1, The Message, and Disney (Kate) or Alt-Nation (Alex). So having music on that's completely my own, my favorites, is somewhat unusual. I haven't really used my iPhone for music, ever. Had ripped all my CDs to iTunes once, 3 computers and an iPod Nano ago. I guess it's mostly lost to that tiny hard drive now; I've thought I should try to charge up the Nano and see what's still there.

Shawn loves to buy music, and still does, although he got us a family subscription to Apple Music last year, and I like it. I just stream whatever I want to hear (like Hamilton), and don't pay anything extra for it. I can't really understand how to "do" music anymore. I know I don't own the things I stream, and I guess I'm okay with that. Shawn also got a record player this year and is getting back into vinyl, which is fun and funny.

What do you listen to?

Edit: I popped back in to say that when it wasn't musicals, what I mostly listened to in my youth (heh) was light alternative (not the real hard grungy stuff, but REM, U2, etc.), acoustic-guitar singer-songwriter types and mainstream pop, and in the '90s I listened to a lot of country. ;) Once I got married I sort-of defaulted to whatever he listened to, because he has good taste in music. Sometimes I do miss my own music, but apparently not enough to do anything about it.

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We have a weird work week with some extra extra curriculars Monday/Tuesday, plus Valentine's Day, and then Kate's birthday on Friday, but here are 2 meals I have planned anyway.

Ranch Chicken Thighs with Rice - But I'm wanting to bake this instead of cooking it entirely in a skillet.

UPDATE: Verdict on this? A good, if a little bland, weeknight meal. I don't think there was a point in marinating the chicken in Ranch dressing; we couldn't taste it at all. Would use Ranch seasoning instead next time, or add garlic and onion powder.

Spaghetti and spaghetti squash with meat sauce - I have decided I'm not a fan of zucchini noodles, but spaghetti squash works. It feels more substantial to me under sauce. With a Caesar salad and garlic toast for the bread-eaters, lucky ducks.

...and here are some recipes I've pinned lately, that I want to try. Maybe you will, too:

This marinade, I did try already, and the fam concluded it was the best pork tenderloin ever. And even though I normally don't love pork tenderloin, I enjoyed it too.

This Pollo in Potacchio is SO not me! Chicken and tomatoes just don't go together, in my mind. But I'm curious about it, and it's compliant. So it's a maybe.

I used to watch Sara Moulton ALL the time when I was a new bride, newly cooking every night. :) Happy memories. This looks pretty yummy, once I'm eating flour again: Salmon Cakes w/Corn.

My lunchbox vs. your lunchbox

Since this blog is mostly private, I feel okay sharing my honest thoughts, and after spending a weekend with 8 other moms, I'm feeling ... I don't know, weird... about What We (Collectively) Pack Our Kids for Lunch. I hope this won't offend anyone.

I think I'm a normal mom, but I know I'm more lenient about food than most moms these days. It was so apparent to me this weekend.

One mom on our trip made a big deal of telling us, "I haven't bought Pop-Tarts since Ana was BORN." She had brought 2 big boxes of them to share because we were all assigned to bring something for breakfasts in the house we rented.

P.S. I make sure we never run out of Pop Tarts at my house.

Another mom, with whom I drove tandemly (is that a word?) made her daughter choose between getting a small soda at one of our road trip stops, or having any dessert after pizza that night.

I'm not trying to be a jerk, but... it's a road trip, isn't it supposed to be fewer rules, and little treats and snacks along the way? Isn't that what makes it fun?

I was just reminded about all of this, reading another mom's post about a school lunch. She wrote, "Seeing what was offered by the school -- chicken nuggets, rice with about 2 pieces of vegetable, chocolate milk (skim, filled with additives), juice, and cookies!? Yeah, we’re going to keep packing lunch for the foreseeable future."

Look, I get it, chicken nuggets are not that healthy, and vegetables are, but... they're kids. That seems like a pretty decent lunch to me. I feel like the school is probably also trying to manage its waste, and if they give a big serving of vegetables, it might all get thrown away. (I mean, I have no idea, I've never cooked for a school.)

So, in her situation, what is she going to put in her kid's lunchbox that's so much better? Kale chips? Carrots and dip, of course, but in my house that would be Ranch dip, not beet hummus (which one mom brought to the house this weekend), because kids don't eat hummus in my experience. Lightly salted nuts/raisins? My kids turn up their noses at the very idea and would trade that for chips if they got the chance. A sandwich cut into stars on 9-grain bread? Sure, go for it, but know that the bread might get peeled off and thrown away, and now you're headed into Bento Box territory, my friend.

I do/did try to make sure my kids have fruit in their lunch if possible (I don't pack Alex's lunch anymore, he's 14). Kate is a fruit lover, so she's all for it, apple slices, grapes, clementines, berries. She'll even do carrots and Ranch once or twice a week, and she loves a good Caesar salad. But otherwise, it's a deli-meat sandwich on Whitewheat bread, chips or crackers (usually chips), 2 cookies, and a drink, which is Gatorade these days, because juice boxes and Capri Suns are too babyish and they don't like plain water. We buy "Fun Food" when we can, and it's pizza with salad, or a burger with chips, or (gasp!) a Chick Fil A sandwich with a Welch's fruit snack. I don't feel bad about it.

I don't know, Kate and I had a talk after our trip and the Pop Tarts comment. I think if you deprive your kids of ALL the yummy snacks, you're setting them up to binge on them when they're finally independent. Freshman 15, anyone? We talk a lot about moderation, and I try to include veggies with dinners most nights, but it's difficult when they only like broccoli, corn and green beans. And while we're at it, my kids eat candy, and sometimes they sneak it up to their rooms and... I don't punish them for it. Do I wish they wouldn't do that? Yeah. Do I think it's worth fussing about? Not really.

Maybe I've got it all wrong, but I guess I'm not planning to change my lunchbox ways. I think we're fine. Guess what? When Alex buys his lunch at the high school cafeteria, he chooses a side of broccoli on purpose, to make sure he gets his vegetables. I just find it interesting that so many moms want other moms to know how very healthy they are.

Review of January, Preview of February

With my new planner I am finding that I want to do monthly reviews, and I've been working on it a little bit this last week of January. Here's what I've concluded about January:

• I accomplished four of my goals: 1. Host a party at our house, 2. Make an appointment with a financial planner and move our accounts to a local branch, 3. Yoga with Adriene's 30-day Dedicate series, and 4. Invite a non-work friend to lunch. 
• As a bonus, we recovered our kitchen chairs. I didn't even speak it as a goal, but it was one, and it got done!
  
  This is a LOT more "accomplishing" than I think I typically do! I don't know if having the planner had anything to do with it, but it makes me feel good at any rate.
  
• I/we did not manage: 1. Buying a new mattress (it was supposed to be our Christmas gift to each other... now it might be our Valentine's gift? Or Anniversary (April)? LOL, we'll get it when we get it, I guess) 2. Getting the cats to a (new?) vet for a yearly checkup. Although, after reading online I'm not sure they actually need one unless they are sick or really too fat for their own good, and I don't think ours are... kinda unsure about it but I also don't recall taking our cat to the vet once a year when I was a kid, so.... maybe I'll let that one go.
• I also did not do as much prayer/meditation time as I have in the recent past (pre-December), and I'll have to work on adding that back in. My quiet mornings at my desk have been supplanted by driving Alex to school on all these cold mornings, lately, instead of him walking to the bus stop (in his HOODIE). It's fine, and I like having time with him for sure, but when I get to my office (late-ish), I feel like I need to skip the excess me-time. So come on, Spring. (I think next week we're supposed to have 70s!)

I am also noticing that the "planning" mindset has me thinking about the future so much, it's hard to be mindful of the present moment, and I would like to do better about that. Interesting.  

In February, I'm looking forward to our Girl Scout Troop's weekend trip to Savannah (today!), having a half-day off for that and for Kate's birthday the 15th, and the Big Project at work being over on the 24th. I'm anxious about Alex having a week-long break from school when the rest of us don't. Not sure how to handle those, and I feel sad that he's probably going to be bored that week. :/

Meals have not been that great, I will say. The Whole Life Challenge is a challenge in that regard. My kids/family don't want to eat butternut squash soup, salads, veggie omelets, or plain chicken breasts, I can't imagine why. I planned next week's dinners super-quickly this morning, since I'm leaving town tonight and won't get to do the grocery shopping (darn). It's a mix-up of our usuals. Tacos, pork chops and field peas, one-sheet meal with sausage and chicken sausage. Easy, but completely unoriginal. Check back next week, maybe it'll be better.