Stories to tell, and New School worries

So, it appears that blogs like mine are EXACTLY what the blog-world needs to hold on to. Little stories like mine, told in my very own authentic voice, with no want for swag or ads or paid promotions, are what makes blogging great. I am so glad to hear this.

(...I AM GOING TO BE SO RICH!!!!!)

Just kidding.

But it does make me feel good that I've not had the guts wanted to take my blog to "the next level." I can't believe I spent an hour this morning reading all the comments at the BlogHer09 website, though. I don't know. Maybe a part of me does kinda dream of going there. I mean, some women who go to the conference ARE just small-time, like me. Anyway.

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What I really wanted to write about today is my number one fear right now. I'm feeling really worried that AJ isn't going to like school. I'm worried about his little feelings, his admitted nervousness about making new friends in Kindergarten. Which is so NORMAL, and I know that. But you know how it is, a Mom hates to think of her little guy being sad or afraid. Mostly, I'm worried he won't think school is fun -- that he'll feel like it's drudgery at a young age, all the way through the 12th grade, because he's been going to school so much of his young life already.

I'm worried he won't be motivated to do homework. Homework that it's CRAZY to HAVE at age five, but nonetheless, they have it now and he's going to have to DO IT. I bought him a little numbers "activity" book, as the school suggested, to work on during the summer. But every time I bring it up, he finds something else (video games) that he'd rather do instead. And I don't begrudge him the video games; they're part of his generation as no other generation before. I want him to be able to play them, actually. But when I was a kid I used to do "pretend" homework. I'd just grab any book off my Mom's shelf, open it up at an angle on my desk, and pretend to take notes from it, on a piece of paper. So I don't understand NOT wanting to do a Brand-new! Numbers! Activity! Book! (I was a nerd, yes.)

I'm worried about logistics. HOW are we going to get homework done? Will it be during his After-Care program at the school, or with me (somehow) at home... um... after dinner? I can't sacrifice his 8:00 bedtime to do homework, and I certainly can't sacrifice his bath... so like I do, I'm worrying over it. I'm sure in the end it will only be 10 minutes of homework at the most, but one never knows.

Despite my eensy hesitation, we ALSO signed him up for tee-ball. Now, I will say that on the one hand, what could be more AWESOME than little boys in baseball pants? I am excited for our first "team" experience, and we're hoping to be on a team with a little friend of his from daycare, which would be great for him. (Otherwise we would surely lose touch with that family, and the 2 boys have grown up together.) There's a requirement that the parents work the concession stand sometimes. Fun!! There will be something to do OUTDOORS every weekend. Score. The season is short, ending in October. All of that makes me giddy.

But the logistics, again, of having 2 practices a week until the games begin, and everything else that comes with a new Committment... worried.

Suppose it would be better to focus on the things I'm excited about, yes?
>> School supplies!! I was putting his name on pencil box and glue bottle last night.
>> Volunteering for lunchroom duty once a month. squee!
>> We got his textbooks -- there's a Spanish one! Yay for foreign language!
>> UNIFORMS!
>> He seems to like Harry Potter quite a bit already. (I can't wait to get to the Sorting Hat!)

Shameless attempt to WIN

They're giving away some lovely natural body scrub at Live Well Spend Well, and I get another entry for posting about it on my blog. And I get even MORE entries if YOU go over there, and leave a comment saying "el-e-e sent me."

And people, if you'd seen my feet lately, you would do this for me, as a kindness.

Sorry, TMI. But lordy, my feet in the summer are an embarrassment. All that fresh air and none of the armoured protection of socks. My worst grooming habit is to pick at that dry skin. I haven't allowed myself real pedicures in probably a year becuase, hey, you gotta save money somewhere and I'm NOT GIVING UP STARBUCKS.

Anyway, I'm sure you'd like to win, too, and if you do I will be happy for you. My feet will cry, but *I* will smile politely. Go forth and enter, and please put my name in the box!

7 Quick Takes Friday - with logo!

1. I cannot even tell you how sick I am of a particular project I'm working on at the office. It's a long "training guide," and I've never written anything like that before. Even in college I managed to graduate without ever being required to submit a paper much over 10 pages long. This one, so far, is at 18. AND IT'S BORING. My first draft is due today (Friday) and I will be so happy to kiss it goodbye.


2. After that, I am indulging. I've been invited to a single gal-pal's condo for pooltime!! I had forgotten that one of the best things about apartment/condo-living is having a pool. (Our subdivision has one, but we're too cheap to pay for membership.) Anyway, I simply can't wait. I bought a jar of fruity salsa and some chips, and we are going to lounge and swim and chit-chat and I am really looking forward to it. TODAY! In 5 hours!


3. My husband is a dear for giving me the afternoon/evening off. Love you, honey.


4. AJ starts Kindergarten in T-minus 3 weeks. Do you guys remember that just the other day, he was a teeny baby?? (Those are from the way-back machine, and MAN, have I been blogging a long time.)


5. Book Club is reading Twilight for August. Yes, we caved. Yes, we're planning to watch the movie at the meeting. I am more excited than I ought to be to finally get in on all the Edward hub bub. Meanwhile, I have started reading the first Harry Potter with AJ. I can't decide if he's really old enough, but took the plunge anyway. I know he's dying to see the first movie, but I just couldn't bear it if he didn't experience the book beforehand. We only manage to read a few pages at a time, but I think he likes it so far.


6. One of my coworkers seems to bring her kids into the office (ages 9 and 14) pretty often. I don't mind this, but I think it's odd. Have you ever done it? I mean, somewhat regularly? I know it's summer and all... maybe it's just that I've never worked with people who have that age kids before.


7. Latest TV pleasure (sorta): Extreme Logging: Ice Loggers. I don't love the show, but am somewhat intrigued. Mostly I love the cute Canadian accents. Eh? I keep thinking a lot of those dudes look much too young to be driving such heavy, dangerous machines. (I am getting so freaking old.)

go read more Quick Takes at Conversion Diary... happy weekend!

Good lunch hours

-- Walking across a Midtown street, on a 75-degree spring day, to a little park with a fountain, with your sweetie. He brings the sandwiches, you bring the chips and drinks. (Years ago, before DH was my "H.")

-- Driving home since you only work 7 miles away, patting the doggie, making a yummy sandwich or burrito, and watching a little noon-time news or BravoTV for 40 minutes. (Less often than I'd like - I somehow forget about this option.)

-- Driving home and eating, then cleaning a bathroom or vacuuming the bedrooms. (Not fun, but sometimes necessary.)

-- Going to the mall which is only 1 mile away; finding great shoes at Payless for next-to-nothing, picking up a sandwich, sniffing some stuff at Bath & Body, not to mention getting a "walk" in because you parked at the wrong mall entrance for Payless. YESSSS! (Last week.)

-- Being asked to lunch with a friendly coworker, and trying a new taco place that has patio seating. (Monday.)

-- Taking a 15 minute walk around the pond behind the office building, then going back in, heating up lunch, and reading a Philippa Gregory novel for 45 minutes while eating. (Yesterday.)


P.S. I don't include a lunchtime trip to Target in this list because 1 hour never seems long enough to peruse all the different sections of Target. Even when I have a focused objective and go there? It's never quite long enough!

Long overdue photo

The new cube-view

*forehead slap*

DH and I had a good, long talk last night about AJ. He had threatened a whiny meltdown RIGHT before he went to sleep, and MAN, are we weary from his fits.

We realized by talking about it that, DUHHHH, in daycare "summer camp," the kids don't get the 2-hour nap that they got all during Pre-K. I am such an idiot. They get "quiet time" with a movie, but OUR KID? Will do anything to stay awake during a movie. Perhaps THIS is the reason for his recent behavior. He's TIRED. (This, and the fact that his baby sister is no longer a little lump of sweetness, and is demanding extra attention and learning to throw her OWN fits, and he feels the need to compete.)

---> Mom guilt. I let him sleep an extra 10 minutes this morning.

It's tough because DH and I have always kept early-morning work schedules. When we commuted long distances, it was simply to get there on-time. Then it just became habit, and now I like being able to leave the office in the 4:00 p.m. hour. But this little revelation makes me want to reconsider our routine. Of course, Kindergarten begins at 8:00 sharp, and if he were taking the bus, it comes around at 10 minutes to seven in our neighborhood. (Get this -- the young kids' bus comes before dawn, but the middle school bus doesn't come until 8:30 or 9:00. Who planned that? Someone without little kids, that's who.) What I'm saying is, he's getting older now and the option to sleep a little later won't exist in a few weeks, anyway.

DH and I concluded, therefore, that we need to make 8:00 BEDTIME a priority. Since it's summer we've been pretty slack, letting him go 'til 8:30 or 8:45. But no more.

Did I say "idiot" already? ----> little bit of Mom guilt. Sigh.

Don't much like

One of the things I don't like about a (continuous, ongoing, lifetime for.ev.er.taking) weight loss effort is that you eventually have to become obsessed with it in order to succeed. Linda's article, and Swistle's, talk about the outward motion of obsession, where you "preach" to other people. I have definitely been there, preachy about fitness and diet when it's going well for me. I get especially preachy about yoga, which I love. Which is all probably a bummer to everyone around me who has to listen.

But this time around, it's a bummer for me as well. It's mentally draining, and lordy is it time-consuming, to constanly count calories and be mindful. I spend time working and re-working my menu in FitDay to get the right numbers of calories each day. With the stair-climbing I've decided is a fun new tactic, I find I'm thinking about it all the time -- When's my next "stair break?" Have I accumulated 20 minutes yet? Are people wondering where I am?

I also like online support; I think I've said before, I've used a message board in the past with success and made friends (one of whom still reads this blog sometimes, hi Stacy!) in the process. So today I signed back up for that, and damn if I don't want to check it obsessively to see new posts for recipes, tips, and responses to my questions. It's like another whole JOB.

I don't want to be obsessed with this. I want to be obsessed - and AM - with my kids. I am paid to be obsessed with my job. I am currently in the middle of a book series (Philippa Gregory) and obsessed with Tudor England, wanting to rent movies and watch TV shows about same. I don't really have time to add another bucket-load of time and mental energy to this, but I feel like I need to if it's going to work. I also don't want to obsess over it and make this a diet blog, which it sometimes already is and I'm sorry for my readers who are uninterested in that.

And it's just 10 little pounds! Just a little belly fat and arm jiggle! It doesn't seem to DESERVE all the stupid attention it's getting.

Two, 4, 6, 8, How do we Procrast-in-ate?

BLOG POST! BLOG POST! YAAAAAAY, BLOGS!

I'm supposed to be writing a white paper. My first. On a medicalish topic which I know very little about. Isn't that fun! Wheee! Wikipedia, here I come.

I would much rather talk about Nothing in this text box than about Something in that one. So...

-- My new cardio program is called "Running the Fire Stairs at my Office 4 Times a Day." I'm aiming for 5 minutes each time and it works out to almost that much. Currently going down and back up twice (I'm located on the 4th floor) definitely gets my heart pumping. The first time down, I'll walk back up 2-at-a-time. The second trip, I'll jog up 1-at-a-time. I never wanted to be one of THOSE people who had to workout by "taking the stairs" and "parking farther away," but hey, whatever it takes. I can't seem to motivate for a damn 20-minute session at home, so this will have to do until I get tired of it. (Or until tonight, when AJ gets his birthday present -- a Wii! Note his bedtime is at EIGHT SHARP.)

It's kinda fun, really, and clandestine and all. I just go after I get up for a bathroom break. I hate not wearing supportive shoes, but oh well. Hopefully my knees will manage.

-- KT's latest thing is wearing hats. Last night we had her all souped up in a backwards ballcap, with a string of mardi gras beads around her neck. She was all, "WHAT UP, YO?" It was cracking us up.

-- AJ's latest thing... I don't really want to talk about his latest thing. The word "bratty" has come into play. It's unpleasant.

-- KT's not all sunshine and rainbows either. I think the 16-month-stage was really tough with AJ, too, as in: CLING FEST. She wannnnnts MAAAA MAAAA. She's funny when she gets mad, too -- she goes over to our fridge and SWIPES! all the alphabet magnets harshly onto the floor. SO THERE!

-- Home life's been a little nuts, is what I'm saying. These kids are both WILD MONKEYS.

Everybody's Fourth of July

I'm loving stories of everyone's Fourths of July. The picnics, the "must-have" foods like corn-on-the-cob and watermelon, the fireworks.

For us, it was a perfect weekend. Friday afternoon, we swam at a friend's house in water that was cool and refreshing (unlike our condo's 85-degree pool from vacation week!), grilled hot dogs and chased kids around the yard.

Saturday, we relaxed with some other friends, let the kids play in their backyard where KT climbed the ladder and slid down the plastic slide with NO FEAR, and ... grilled hot dogs. And burgers. And brats. (Our must-have foods included baked beans, potato salad, and watermelon, for those of you playing along at home.)

Then we drove to a most unspectacular place, a nearby office park, where we had a most spectacular time! The kids ran around throwing a football (AJ tried really hard to throw it -- he's used to a smaller ball -- but he got in a couple of very good catches), and then they enjoyed sparklers and cupcakes while someone's iPod kept us entertained. "Jack and Diane," which I normally dislike, just sounds RIGHT on 4th of July, you know?

When the fireworks began, AJ hightailed it to the car with his Daddy -- poor little guy, the noise was too much for him -- but he still got to enjoy the amazing show. He and Daddy "COOOOOL!!!"ed and "AWESOME!"d every blast together. :) We were RIGHT underneath the display. I mean, it was directly above my eyes - I was almost worried the sparks would fall ON us. Beautiful. Loud. Smile-inducing. KT fell asleep on my chest as I sat in a lawn chair, next to neighbors and strangers, under an almost full moon.

In all my summers, this July 4th was undoubtedly one of my most contented and happy.

Swimsuits, smiles