Friday Five: Health, books, friends, and (2) kids

1. Health update: I finally got a negative Covid test this past Tuesday, thank goodness! Took forever... and I punished myself, I guess, by continuing to test so many times, hoping. But anyway, I'm so glad that's over. I still feel some lingering effects, like a persistent need to clear my throat a little, and by the end of the day, I get a little stuffy nose. For those general two weeks, I was having to allow myself some afternoon naps -- I got so tired! Made me even more grateful for WFH, not that they would have allowed me to the office with Covid. Both the nose thing and the fatigue seem to be getting better now. (I would still like to allow myself naps, however!) I never lost taste/smell, thank the heavens above.

2. I got new books! One afternoon last week, while both kids were at a graduation party from 2 until 8, I took my solo trip to Barnes & Noble. It was so fun. I came back with a copy of The Borgia Confessions, which I hope will be good. It's been a good while since I've read a 15th-century Catholic-church-scandal-drama, lol. From now until the beach trip, I downloaded from the e-library an Emma Donohue novel, The Pull of the Stars, set during the time of the 1918 flu epidemic. Appropriate! So far I love it.

3. For my birthday we had a double-date! We never do a ton of double-date-nights with friends, well... because we don't feel like we HAVE that many couple-friends, really. Or schedules don't line up. (People who have kids, y'know?) But for my birthday, I decided that's what I wanted to do. We made plans with Allegra, my best band-mom buddy, and her husband, and had a lovely, lovely time! A couple of peach bellinis helped, to be sure, but even without those I think we would have enjoyed it. (I only felt slightly bad that I chose to go out without the kids for my birthday. Then I stopped that thought; sometimes you have to allow yourself a wish granted. I deserved it.) Last night, we met up with the family of Alex's future UGA roommate for pizza. It was also fun, and they said they'd like to get together a few more times before the boys head to school. A little as if they're interviewing us repeatedly, Shawn pointed out, but I still want to. ;) So yay!

4. Alex is enjoying some downtime after a very full, very non-stop senior year. I'm glad for him. He deserves to rest and relax; he's reading for pleasure, gaming, sleeping really late. I even think he's been bored some of these afternoons. (Good!) This week, though, he had his very first job interview. Fingers crossed, because I can't have him bored all summer, and a little spending money will be nice for him to have. Yesterday he and I went to lunch at Panda Express, one of his favorites. I'm trying not to think about the finite number of days we have left with him at home....

5. Kate is away at WinShape. In every photo we've seen, she seems utterly happy, no surprise. But I woke up in the night thinking, among many other things for over an hour, about how she's cut off from her 8th grade friends this week (phones aren't allowed), and the minute she gets back we'll be going away again, to the beach. I guess July will require some social events planned for her. I want her to keep those friends close.  

Hooray for Fridays! We have Alex's senior piano recital tonight, and maybe tomorrow we'll see a movie (and maybe do some dorm shopping? At least that's one thing I'd like to do...). 

Welcome to the Back Half of the Year!

Uh, yeah. This year's half-over already!

I did a little review of June this morning in my paper planner and, I gotta say, it was a fast month! One of the things I wrote down as a "win" was this: Being more open to "yes." I haven't mastered that, not by a long shot, but there were a few examples. 

• On a random weekday, Kate asked if her friend Anna could come over to hang out. I would be working a full day at home that day AND we had an orthodontist appointment. But I said yes. Thankfully there was no additional driving for me, so I let her do it, even though it required a bit of set-up and a lunch out that I hadn't planned. 
• When she forgot a critical bag for her trip to Kentucky (stupid of ME, actually), I said yes to fixing it by overnighting the bag to her. Never mind it cost me $160. Never mind she'd only be there for 4 days. We live in the 21st century and things can be overnighted, so I did it. To make her happy.
• When Alex asked to have the whole clarinets section over the DAY BEFORE we left for vacation, during a busy work-week... I let him. He handled most of the setup (all I had to do was make one extra trip to the grocery store and hand him some serving bowls). It helped that he didn't ask me permission for the backyard activity of water balloons, because I might NOT have said yes to that... but actually he and his friends and his sister cleaned ALL of the pieces up meticulously afterwards. 

So even though it kinda makes me feel scattered and unplanned in the moment, saying yes was a good thing about June. :) 

Today I did something else rather spontaneous. I have been harping on Alex to work on his college planning, and he has been, slowly but surely. We set some deadlines for ourselves (him). I really do want him to take the lead but it is like pulling teeth. Anyway, this week he was supposed to start scheduling some campus tours. He asked me last night how, exactly, to do that, and I explained it to him (go to the school's website, look for an "Admissions" or "Visit" link, click it...) The fact that he asked that question made me think mayyyyyybe I need to just go ahead and get more involved. Which.... argh. But whatever. So today I hopped onto one of the websites for a local university, one of his top 6 choices, just to see if what I'd advised him was as EASY as I thought it should be. It was. I clicked "campus visit" and noticed they only had availability TOMORROW for a guided tour -- nothing in August. So I booked it. I asked him first, but good gravy, that was close. I think if we'd waited one more day we'd have had to wait until November. So at lunchtime tomorrow we'll be on a guided college tour! Yay!

Maybe there will be more Yes for the rest of 2021. I mean, I guess that will be up to me and my mindset. "Can-do" attitude goes a long way for motivation, I guess. Fake it 'til you make it. Yes, and. 

January wins

The first win, I guess, is that I'm working at my kitchen table this afternoon ("working"), and this is the 2nd time this month I have done so.

The second win is that January is finally OVER, and I say that with love, but man, did this month pile on the Busy. It felt like it would never end, with the weekends going thusly:

• New Year's weekend, which we spent in Pcola and was lovely
• New bed delivery (Th), and middle school semi-formal for Kate (Fr), and basketball (Sa)
• Painters in the house (Th and Fr), and then JTF (Sa-Su, skipped basketball); thankful for MLK Day off (roofers)
• Aladdin, Jr. weekend and Mom and Dad's visit to see the play (loved having you!), plus basketball
• This current weekend will be basketball - hopefully the last game on Saturday but only if Kate's team loses (it's bad to want them to lose, right?)

Weekdays were rehearsals for all of that, of course. So, yeah. Stick a fork in me, I'm done. (Thank goodness the marching band is off in January!) All of those things were still wins, though. 

The NEW BED! We gave in to the Sleep Number pressure and I think we both like it! I won't say "love," because we're not hopping out of bed in the mornings with zero pain, but it seems to be significantly less pain. I love how, when I first lie down to go to bed at night, the bed pauses and then slightly adjusts to me. It's like a gentle hug: "Welcome to bedtime!" I wonder, will my Sleep Number need to go UP in the years to come, as the bed starts to wear (up is more firm, down is softer)? Probably. Still, it's a significant improvement over a bed whose springs were legitimately poking us in the back/sides while we slept. 

The Paint! Of all the rooms in our house, the entryway was going to be hardest to paint, because it's open to the 2nd story. So we hired it out. I went with Ellie Gray in the entry and Silverplate in the hall (both Sherwin Williams) and they look good together; actually there's barely any difference between them, but that's okay.  

Hello, Fresh. ?  I think this is a win. I'm certainly glad we've tried it. It isn't blowing me away, but it's good food and proper portions and it helps me not serve the same-old same-olds all the time. And helps me have an answer when Kate asks "What's for dinner tonight?"

One more tiny win: At work, I was given the [hokiest, dorkiest] "Kinda a Big Deal" Award for the month. It's supposed to come with a gift card which I haven't received yet, but still, it's nice to be recognized and the person who nominated me (I found out later) was not who I would have expected. I want to do my best at work, but I am having a hard time settling on what that looks like. I also got an adjustable desk so I can stand up twice a day for an hour or so! I love it -- something I've wanted for a long time, work-wise. I think I also got out of having to travel to an event in April, woo!

I'm reading "Where'd You Go, Bernadette." It's funny, but I really dislike every character -- they're terrible people, all of them! Still, a quick read that has felt light in an otherwise stressy month, is a WIN.

Happy Friday!

Let's Go Out for Drinks

You guys, I SO do not want to do my work today. Good thing it's "fake Friday." Two days off for Easter, hooray! So instead of work let me tell you what I did FUN last night: I went OUT. After choir practice ended at 9:00pm. To a Taphouse.

!!

So rare are the occasions of me going out for beer after an event, that I can't even think of the last time it happened. College, probably. I'm not much of a beer-drinker. In my 20s I drank beer, because pitchers were the easiest and cost-effective option at Manuel's Tavern and at Melton's App & Tap, two places my friends and I frequented in those days.

But then I guess I grew up and started drinking wine instead. Beer had too many calories, back when we counted calories. Lately we barely even drink wine. If I open a bottle for one glass on a Friday night, the bottle sits, corked, for at least a week on my counter, sadly not being drunk (drinken, as Kate still says). Not for lack of wanting to, just lack of time, really. During dinner at home, there's no guarantee that I don't have to go out in the car again for some activity. And when I get home from said activity, when it would be nice to sit down in front of TV with a glass, it's already bedtime (9:00 pm! We are so old). Bah. I know I'm not really missing anything.

ANYWAY. Last night was the 60th birthday of my friend who does not look 60, so her husband texted me early in the week with this: "Drinks after choir for bday." I didn't know he had my number, and wasn't certain whose bday, but figured it out fairly quickly and decided I would join them. Turned out to be a great (small, thankfully) group of people I genuinely like and yet rarely spend time with, outside of choir. I would love for Shawn and me to go out drinking with them again. (We have been, one other time, when we were all invited to a wedding and pre-partied.) Also, I need to have Chris and Lisa over to dinner sometime, because apparently that is a thing I think I need to do to express "I like you." They're great.

It gave me one little glimpse into the future, and I said, "Sometimes I can't wait for the kids to be all grown up so we can do what we WANT again." Immediately I wished I could take it back, nearly slapped my hand over my mouth, because I know, I KNOW that we will be so sad the day they're all grown up and gone. (Unless they come out drinking with us!) Chris said it takes about 6 minutes to get over it. HA! But I know that statement is also false. Life is funny, isn't it? And Time Marches On: This week, we went to our first end-of-year Band Banquet for the high school. END OF year. Alex's first year of high school just began, and is nearly over. He walked away from the 3 of us quickly after we walked into the banquet, off to sit with his lunch-table friends. Praise Jesus.

Sooner than I think, he'll be the one going out for beers with his friends, heaven help me.


P.S. I had one glass of Atlanta Hard Cider and a taste of a friend's Lord Grey Sour Ale, and they were both delicious. So head's up, DH: We will be visiting this Taphouse again, probably while the kids are at camp in 7 short weeks.

This Week's Wins

Something new... instead of calling out my complaints in the title, let's see if naming it positively shifts my perspective a little. (Oh, don't worry, I'll get my complaints in there, no doubt. Plenty for you to commiserate with, if that's your thing.)

1. First win of the week goes to MONDAY, because the kids went back to school, thank the good Lord. It was time. It was soooooo time. We humans thrive on routine, and my young humans were sorely lacking theirs. Naturally there are screen-time related details. I'm fully conflicted: It's our fault as parents, it's not our fault -- it's not going to kill them, it IS definitely going to kill them, or at least their developing brains -- I am top of it with rules/limits, I HAVE NO IDEA how to set and enforce limits -- he'll be fine and get into college somewhere, he DOESN'T DO ANYTHING BUT THE iPHONE and HE'LL DEFINITELY NEVER GET INTO COLLEGE!! -- et cetera. Today while driving Alex to school, he wasn't on the phone (a minor miracle). But he wasn't talking to me, either. He hardly ever starts the conversation; I always try, but it usually ends with a one-phrase answer. Is this simply because he's a teenage boy and they don't get chatty with their moms, anyway, or has his screen addiction (?!) ruined his ability to start conversations? That's my latest worry. #momlife

back to wins... 

2. Also on Monday, I went to Bed, Bath and Beyond looking for an iced tea/water server, you know the kind, big glass jugs with a spout on the front, in a little twin set? There was only one option, sadly, and it didn't have quite the perfect metal stand for my design taste, nor did it have the Pinterest-worthy chalkboard labels, but I don't have time to quibble and it was something like $29 which seemed like a good price, so I bought that sucker. I am hosting a birthday party in T-minus 9 days and every second counts.

3. Big win on Tuesday, and the accomplishment of one of my 2019 goals -- I had lunch with a friend. The official goal is to invite at least one non-work friend out to lunch each month. Tuesday I went with Jackie, a buddy from church choir, and we ate Mexican food and giggled about gossipy stuff and she told me some deep family stuff she's dealing with, which I felt privileged to know, and so. It was awesome. 

4. I got my car back from repairs. All better. Except it smells severely of new paint. I will not miss my rental car, a Chevy Cruze which was perfectly nice but it had that auto-eco-engine-off feature where the car just shuts off at stop signs or red lights. I know I could have probably cancelled that feature somehow, but I wasn't interested in reading the manual for a car I only had for a few (8) days. It was kind-of interesting, too - dead silence in the middle of a busy road - so I just experienced it. 

5. My company's president (US office only) resigned, after only 2 months on the job. Hahahahahaha! Nothing new at all, happens all the time. Gave us the little shot of office drama that we feel lost without. Ugh. I mean, it's not a win, really, except I guess he wasn't the perfect fit that we (really, truly) thought he was, so in the end it's probably better this way. And it will engender MORE office drama, probably, in the hiring of a new one. Woo hoo!  

6. 9 days of yoga so far! I haven't quit the 30-day program, although today my right wrist was not having it. But that's the beauty of a home practice, as Adriene would say - I can do (or not do) what I want and no one can even see me! Stupid aches and pains. 

7. Sunshine! After weeks upon weeks of grey, misty weather - which I enjoy, don't get me wrong - we have finally had a week of clear skies. Relief! It's nice to not feel like you're in a cocoon, or in a literal fog all day long for days on end.