Piano

I've been playing the piano again, a little bit. It feels calming and restorative to me. I'm terrible! I stumble over the notes and the rhythms start and stop and speed up and then slow again. It's like a fourth grader who's never had lessons! But I like to think I could get better if I keep practicing.

I started playing the piano when I was five. Thank you, Mom and Dad. I enjoyed it and was fairly good for a five-year-old, and then for a 6, 7, 8, 9, 10-year old. I had a good teacher. During middle school and the beginning of high school, I had an even better teacher. He had studied at an actual conservatory and liked to talk about that fact. He also liked to think that I was a better pianist than I was. He wanted a "star" pupil, and my sister and I stood in that role a little bit, I think. We played Chopin nocturnes and Beethoven sonatas, and even Rachmaninoff (how I hated Rachmaninoff), and we played in a few competitions and won medals once or twice.

And we -- or specifically, I -- got burned out. Same way I had with tennis a few years before that. I can't remember what year it was, but at age 15 or 17, I decided I couldn't take the weekly lessons anymore, and really didn't have time, with school, cheerleading, community theater and being a teenager, to practice for hours a day. Not even one hour a day. I know it broke my Mom's heart in some ways. It was sad to let it go, but a relief. I've justified it to myself because since then, I've spent much more time singing than playing, and piano was, of course, the perfect foundation for a musician. I took voice lessons, too, and I think I'm more talented vocally than my fingers ever were. (Although, when people comment about how fast I type -- and I love to type -- I often credit ten years of playing the piano.) I have loved being part of choirs, and music performance is definitely part of who I am.

Anyway, a few years ago DH bought me an electric piano. Our house doesn't really have space to  accommodate a real one, but the electric one fits well with our still-not-totally-mature interior design style.  We got it with the kids in mind. Maybe they'll take lessons one day soon? I haven't played it nearly as much as I've wanted to -- and believe me, I've wanted to. Life gets in the way, you know?

But right now I'm coming back to it. I've found a book in my old things that has sonatinas and gavottes in just about the right difficulty level, and because of the years of singing, I'm a much better music reader than I ever was as a teenager.

I'm having fun. I try to sit down during KT's baths. It's just ten minutes, usually, before she needs my attention for something. You do sort-of have to lose yourself in playing/practicing to get good, and there's hardly ever time for that. I'd like to try to make some time.

I have this desire to someday be able to play well again -- to accompany the choir for rehearsals, if needed, or pick up a book and play Christmas songs if anyone wants to sing with me. Oh, and this weekend while standing near the organ during Mass, I really got to thinking how FUN it would be to play THAT instrument! It's silly in a way.

On the other hand, it's a part of me that's been missing. Like I said, it's a stress-reliever now (ironic how it used to cause me stress). I was wondering recently, what would be something FUN to work at every day? And I thought, playing the piano would be fun work. So. I'm not changing careers or anything (I wish!), but I'm going to play.