So, I was talking with my best friend the other day on the phone, and what should come up in our innocuous conversation but -- I don't know what we were originally talking about... recipes? shoes? the dollar spot at Target? but all of a sudden WHAMMO! -- topic = Baby Number Two.
Y'see, she had spoken to my Darling Husband during Beach Week, who tipped her off that after AJ turned two, the T-family goalie would be pulled, as Metrodad says, and there would be much rejoicing. :) And this is what DH and I have discussed, of course. But actually sharing that with people and making it real? Color me a teensy bit unsure.
A), -- well, first there's A, The Obvious: How in God's name will I handle TWO little people at the same time???! -- but that's been covered in so many blogs I don't need to reiterate the Fear here. Breastfeeding AND potty-training AND no sleep, oh my.
My real A), is: I don't know why I do this but I think of getting pregnant in terms of my job, and my coworkers. We've had a bit of turnover in the last week-ish, and so making any announcements sorta shakes everyone up. More important, I suspect that a certain coworker who deserves it very much, is also wishing on making a baby at this time. This someone, very dear to me, is also in my department, so to have us both with maternity leave at roughtly the same time, if it worked out that way, might be difficult for the company. WHY DO I CARE about the company, you ask? Heck, I don't know. I suppose the government dictates that they would just have to FIGURE IT OUT, because they can't fault us ladies for gettin' knocked up, no matter when nor where nor how many. But it's a small company, I can't help but think of it as a little family, and you know -- you have to consider the good of the whole, when it's a family. (Note: In the grand picture of the world, I know this is no real reason to NOT have baby #2 whenever the heck we want... It just crosses my mind is all.)
B), I would NEVER want to steal this dear coworker's thunder, which I hope she knows. I heart her very much and if this happens for her and her hubby, I would be the MOST excited for her. (Although it might be fun to share the experience, too. ICE CREAM IN THE COMPANY FRIDGE, is all I'm sayin'.)
But C), I desperately want AJ to have a sibling he's close to. I know from my own experience that IT IS AWESOME. :) I can't imagine life without my sister, and gosh, it'd be neat for AJ to have a playmate RIGHT IN HIS OWN HOUSE. They say that you space them 2 years apart if you want them to be friends, or 4 years for economics. But in two more years? I might be ready to be all done with diapers. It seems like a long time to wait, and besides, they wouldn't even be in high school together, ever. And that'd be a bummer, I think. Because nothing says "I love you, little brother," like ignoring him in the cafeteria or at the football game.
Finally D), It would probably be quite good for ME, personally, to have a baby -- despite getting FAT again and lordy I fear trying to lose the baby weight after #2, because I've heard it's HARD, and I remember my aforementioned best friend working out like CRAZY after her 2nd was born, and I'm also NOT as fit now as I was in 2003 when I got pregnant the first time -- but it would STILL be GOOD for me because if there is ONE THING I love to do, it is to smother AJ with kisses. And I have a feeling that he is going to wash his hands of ALL that nonsense as he gets older and realizes people are LOOKING AT HIM. So another baby would be a good thing to have because, my word! The overflow of LOVE has got to be poured out on SOMEONE. :)
7 comments:
Oh, I think reading this was just what I needed today. I knew I needed to look outside of me and see what others are dealing with. Although as I was already on the verge of tears, just a few spilled over. I've been wondering what you were going to do about Baby Number Two.
I actually thought this week that I had a "pregnancy symptom," but today it is gone. I woke up so sad -- I think because I was worried about hubby and me -- I told him last night I had a "pregnancy symptom" and I could tell he was worried and scared. So I was sad about that, and then when my "symptom" was gone today, I was sad about that, too!
But just know this: If you get pregnant before me, I will be simply thrilled for you!! I don't have that "jealous" feeling that makes you wish nobody else could get pregnant until it happens for you.
I worry about our company, too. And about hubby's company -- I couldn't exactly play my role while pregnant. But if we really did have babies at the same time, the boss men would figure something out. MG would get to project manage, and the podsters and freelance writers (and maybe an intern) would do all the stuff she does and some of the stuff we do. And I can always hope that I'd come back and actually be able to focus on my work for more than 30 minutes at a time.
I love that your "overflow of LOVE" has got to be poured out. You'd be a great Mommy of 2.
Oh, I actually thought in our meeting yesterday morning that your hair looked great!
I just realized how much I use the word "actually." Yuck.
HAHAHA, sdw, you are joking, right? About being "able to focus for more than 30 minutes" after having a baby? Because, hahaha, that makes me laugh. :)
I do just love you, thank you for sharing this exchange with me. I'm sorry your symptom went away. But it may come back, you never know...! And by the way. When I told DH about our positive HPT, back in the day, it wasn't all hooray and confetti, either. He was stone-cold scared. May not have even smiled. So was Walt, remember that day? I think (and I realize you and D have had a long, unique history on this subject, but still) it's just a man Thing.
Bobeana, please don't cry. Family is still family, even if they move away. :)
Hmm...I have no idea what to tell you on the work front, but the spacing experience has been that around two years apart makes them good friends and about three years helps keep mom sane. I never made it to the three year gap though that was twice the goal. But things like this, they are really personal decisions. So talk to the DH, listen to your heart, and do what seems right for your family. All the co-worker and job issues will pretty much work themselves out as long as you are doing what you feel is right for you and your family.
That made ME laugh -- the "hahaha." Love you back!
Because nothing says "I love you, little brother," like ignoring him in the cafeteria or at the football game.
Ha Ha Ha Ha Best line ever. HOWEVER, mighty big assumption about the little BROTHER...maybe AJ will be kicking some guy's bootay for hitting on his little SISTER in the cafeteria or at the football game!
A little brother or sister will arrive at some unknown but "appointed" time and in retrospect you will say, "it couldn't have been better timing." and you'll think it was all your idea...fate and faith are always at work.
Larry, you are wise and so good to me and yes, that was a big assumption! :) I can't quite imagine a girl-baby, I'll admit.
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