Today is Shawn's Birthday

Happy birthday to my Darling Husband! Today, I will bake you a cake! 

(I seriously love working from home.) 

He went to his office, on the other hand, on his birthday. We are both gluttons for punishment; back in June I worked on my birthday, too. BUT: In a wild act of celebration and treating himself, he did not make a lunch this morning. I think he's going to have a Jersey Mike's sub, and CHIPS. And a full-sugar SODA! 

He has some presents to open later and I will make his favorite meal -- say it together, everyone: Chili. :) It's a perfect winter climate for it, that's for sure! I wrote in my planner for January (because I'm so cheesy) that I want to celebrate him and make sure he feels loved on his birthday, and chili is definitely the way.

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Things have been rolling along, here in '22. Kate and I have attended her first club volleyball events, for which I finally broke down and bought bleacher seats with a back to lean on. These tournaments are long days in multi-court gyms, always on metal bleachers, and my lower back is not a fan. Hopefully the seats will help. Still, it's fun watching her have fun. Our determined little athlete. She really plays hard and gives it her all. 

Alex is doing All The Things in his spring semester senior year! And excelling (sorry to brag, but it's my blog and I will keep bragging): He auditioned for the county Honor Band and made 2nd chair clarinet, and then he went on to audition for All-State and made that, too! (He says he's last chair for that one, but I say, it's still a chair!) So there are several concerts in our future, with the preceding day-long rehearsals for him. He's playing cymbals in the Indoor Percussion Ensemble (new instrument!), and I think he's joined the Jazz Band again, as well?! Not to mention his two AP classes. He's a rock star.

Side note: It's so interesting to me, how in my family of origin, one of us kids (me) did all the artsy things (theater, choral performance) and one, my sister, did all the sports (basketball, cross-country, and later, crew and triathlon). History repeats.

All-State Band will be in March in Athens, a 2-hour drive away, and he'll miss a day of school. I booked a hotel. Along with Kate's out-of-town tournaments (one for basketball and one for volleyball), that means I have three hotel reservations at the moment, in the next 2 months. I hope I can keep everything straight. The problem is both kids seem to have events on the same weekends. Shawn and I are having a Big Calendar Meeting this weekend to work it all out -- who's going where and when. I am not stressed about it, just want to get these many ducks in a row. So I don't ...quack. HAHA!

I'm somewhat nervous that my manager is going to throw in work-trips for me, also; we have lots of tradeshows in March, ughhhhh. Pray she doesn't. I suppose I need to tell her about my personal calendar, but you know what's weird? Those things don't really get discussed as much because we don't see each other at the office anymore. We used to go to lunch once a week, but it has been a very long time since that has happened. 

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This semester I am not even trying to make real "meals" every night of the week. Instead, I'm writing "take out" or "fast-food" or a new term we learned from another family: Helpy-Selfy. Haha! I love that. Full meals are for Thursdays, Fridays, and Sundays only. All other nights are spoken for with practices. Here are some of the things we've eaten lately:

• A cheater's version of meatloaf, mashed potatoes and corn: Old Standard. Everyone likes this, possibly even better than "real" meatloaf. I am opposed to the NAME of meatloaf (so unappetizing), but I enjoy eating it. 
• Sushi & Ramen! Using Kate's kit that she got for Christmas, we made homemade California rolls a couple of times. It's fun! ...although the process makes quite a mess.
• Chicken & Dumplings in the crock pot. I like C&D and it seems like something my Georgia native kids should know and love, for some reason. Is it a Southern food? I don't actually know. But this recipe was good, flavorful. I didn't add any vegetables because that doesn't seem right. I want my C&D to be a thick, carby white food. We had salad on the side and crusty bread to dip into the soup.
• Pork Carnitas Tacos (crock pot again). Very yummy. I made a lime crema (learned it from Hello Fresh), and served with black beans, shredded cabbage and cilantro. 

A Gentle New Year to You

I had the nicest start to the New Year. I got to spend the entire morning of January 1 with coffee and my two planners, last year's and this year's. I sat on my front porch with a delicious breeze and sunshine, thinking and writing, reviewing December, filling in calendars, and really thoughtfully giving myself some gentle goals (if those pages in a planner are empty, I don't feel like it's ready to be used yet). 

The first page in my book (I'm using one by DayDesigner, found at Target) is titled, "Big Picture:" 

1. Gratitude every day
2. More focused time with Shawn, Alex before he goes to college (!), and Kate
3. Celebrating 2 graduations (!) and Jilly's wedding/reception!
4. Taking Care: of myself and of my family, including mom & dad, Shawn, Alex and Kate

That's it. That's the big picture for 2022, the things that are most important. After 2 flipping years of weirdness, I think I just want to love my people, find things to be thankful for, and take good care of us. 

Of course each of those can be broken down into smaller goals and to-dos. Number four, for instance, includes smaller goals of Movement, Nutrition, and Time Management to take care of myself. But that's as far as I'm going. I didn't write down anything like, "Workout 20 minutes a day" or "Update my 401K by [date]," because we aren't going to invite Failure to just waltz right in! NOPE. The column called "Accomplish By" in my planner has VERBS in it, not deadlines.

I really feel so proud of this gentler approach to the New Year., and happy that I had such a peaceful experience planning it. I'm checking the goals pages every day so far, but I don't think I'm going to obsess over them; its just to remind myself to notice. Do I still have a "wish list" of things I'd like to get done this year? Yes. Get an estimate for new floors. Explore new refrigerators. Paint downstairs bathroom and our bed/bath. Etc. And I reduced the Screen-Time limit on my phone, with hope for better habits. But those are not the goals. The goals are To Be Content, To Experience Joy, To Be Attentive, To Maintain Work-Life Balance and (silently, because I'm hesitant to even whisper its name) To Avoid Stress. 

We'll see how this goes. Perhaps nothing whatsoever will get accomplished but by golly I'll be blissed out about it. At least that's the plan! 

Successful Christmas Gifts for our Teens

I spent so much time worrying over Christmas gifts this holiday season. Every year, Shawn starts saying in October, "We really shouldn't wait... we need to ask the kids what they want... we should get started Christmas shopping...." and every year, I agree with him. And then don't really start until after Thanksgiving. It's terrible. I would like nothing more than to FIX THAT, but HOW? This year seemed even harder for whatever reason. But Santa's delivery brought enough Surprise and Delight (always my goal) to make it a good Christmas for both kids, even if there were some very random things included. 

For Alex, Shawn happened to find a PS5 available in October or November, and he jumped on it. Alex had not even asked for this, but the boys in our family are gamers and therefore any gaming system is a good bet. This was the main gift, obviously; everything else for Alex was silly IMHO (and I bought everything else). There was a good quality Braves jacket (for a kid who rarely wears a jacket, but oh well)... a poster frame for this year's marching band show poster... some toiletries stuff... some new pajamas... a book by one of his favorite authors (never a bad idea, so point for me)... and some gift cards. 

Kate's main desire was clothing from lululemon. This is the Esprit of the 2020s, I guess; all the girls MUST have it. It's expensive, so Santa brought her one pair of leggings, and grandparents bought some other items. She had also asked for a pair of Nikes, which she and I bought together at Thanksgiving (so she could try them on, and because her size is hard to find). I asked her permission to wrap them and put them under the tree, since they were already on her wish list, and she agreed. Womp, wommmmp, sad trumpet. You know you're mature when you agree to that! Sorry, Kate. She had given us more of a wish list, so she also got a skincare kit (Drunk Elephant brand), 3 vinyl records by Taylor Swift, a sushi-making kit I found on Amazon, a milk frother for lattes, and some new perfume. And gift cards. It still probably didn't add up to the same monetary total as the PS5, but I'm okay with that. We've already used the sushi kit (fun!) and the milk frother (super fun!) so I feel like those gifts elicited the "delight" I'm looking for. Or maybe I like them for myself, ha! They do live in my kitchen... ;)

Stockings were stressful, too, and I do not feel like I did a very good job there. New shower scrubbies (loofahs) for everyone, some nail polishes for Kate (so she'll quit using mine), random travel-size items and candy, and lottery scratch-offs. I was glad they're old enough for those now - I remember getting them in my stocking when Florida introduced a lottery when I was a teen. I should have gotten more gift cards, I think, or put cash in stockings - it just didn't seem like "enough." Which is silly. Maybe I need to start employing a Swistle mentality about stockings and buy/stash away year-round.

Last note: I have never done matching Christmas Pajamas for our family, but this year I kept seeing people's photos who DO that, and I was jealous. So I am doing it next year. I'll order them online from LL Bean if I must, but I think it's so cute. 

Covid diaries: The kids tested positive

I knew we would eventually get Covid. On Dec. 21st, both kids were planning to go enjoy their first days of Christmas Break by hanging out with friends -- Kate at a sleepover and Alex ice skating with a group. We happened to have three home tests, and because there had been reports of lots of cases in Kate's class toward the end of school (a Christmas semi-formal was postponed), and Alex had been congested and Kate had had a sore throat and headache, I thought it was best if they just quickly took the tests before leaving the house.

Both tests showed positives instantly. We were supposed to leave for Savannah on the 23rd. That plan was scrapped, as well as the kids' plans that day, much to their (Kate's) dismay. Kate has adamantly said the home test was "a fake," and she "doesn't even feel bad," so she doesn't believe it's Covid (she clearly has not watched enough Nightly News). The test result was very clear.

That first day, I didn't know what to do. I sent them to their rooms hesitantly (well, Alex masked up, poured himself a glass of water and then took himself up there with a joking, "Okay, BYE, see you in January") -- but I really didn't like the idea of them banished for 10 full days. I called the pediatrician; the nurse advised exactly that, to quarantine them for 10 days in their rooms. Sigh. By the end of the afternoon, Shawn and I had decided we weren't going to enforce it. Our house is not that big, and since all of us would be home for a stretch of days, anyway, and he and I are vaccinated and boosted, we decided that if we all wore masks and social distanced in common areas, we were fine with them living in the whole house. They're teens, they keep to their rooms pretty naturally already. Sleeping until noon helps. 

For the first few days, I did have them eat meals in the dining room, and us in the kitchen. It was weird, but at least those two rooms are connected with an open doorway so we were still kind-of together. We served from the stove, one at a time. And actually, it was fun seeing the two of them having conversations, laughing (probably at us), and enjoying each others' company. By the third or fourth day their symptoms were subsiding -- and it was Christmas -- and I decided to stop worrying about it. 

Shawn and I have never developed any symptoms. He took the third home test since he was going to work on Dec. 27 -- it was negative. (He wears his mask.) I haven't yet taken one because they are nowhere to be found! There's one drive-thru test site near us and its line is HOURS long; I'm not doing that. I'm mostly quarantining with them in the first place, I'm vaccinated/boosted, and I've double-masked when I've been out to look for home tests or to the grocery store. Maybe I shouldn't be going out at all; I feel like the advice on this isn't abundantly clear for vaxxed/boosted ppl who are exposed but not symptomatic -- in fact I've read that we do NOT have to quarantine. But some of the Internet sure wants to make you feel bad if you don't lock yourself down fully. We've taken some walks outside (masked if we come near anyone). I have an appointment for a PCR test on Jan. 4, the first one available within 25 miles of me, but I'm not really sure I even need that appointment. I'll probably keep it so I can go to my office with a clean conscience. 

Yesterday, a friend dropped off 2 home tests she happened to see in a CVS near her. So kind! I'm saving those for the kids, for before they go back to school, and of course still on the hunt for more, for the future, though it pains me to think we may need them AGAIN.

I also don't know when they will be able to get their boosters now. It was on my to-do list for the holiday break, at least for Alex, who's over the minimum age. But does he have to wait a few weeks now? School will start before then and the DOOMSDAY NEWS tells us he needs a booster to be safe. Not to mention Kate, who isn't old enough for the booster, I don't think.

On the 31st, their ten days will be up. There's still some faint lingering congestion, but it's not bad. Everyone can smell and taste now. Of course we all feel terrible that we didn't get to see Susan/Gammy in Savannah. We are considering a New Year's weekend trip instead, but our pet sitter isn't available; I could ask friends, but I don't want them to feel uncomfortable coming to a house that just had double Covid patients in it. Not that I haven't been Clorox-wiping surfaces most days -- I have. But as the news just gets WORSE with Omicron, it once again doesn't seem prudent to travel, when we're going to visit someone who doesn't have her booster yet (update: she got boosted 12/29) and has smoked her entire adult life. I think Shawn is planning to go on his own; I don't love that idea, it makes me feel terrible that she won't get to see her grandkids, but I also don't really want to go (and we can't all go and leave the cats). Bah. There's no good solution.

Otherwise, my/our Christmas was quite nice! HA. Mainly because I had time to read and finish THREE books and have started a fourth -- and they've all been great, so I'll share:

• Louise Penny's Bury Your Dead. I'd seen Louise on lifeofadoctorswife's book lists and then my mom had this one on my nightstand in Pensacola at Thanksgiving, so I grabbed it. I'm not usually a mystery lover, and this one didn't change my mind, but it was entertaining, particularly the snow-filled scenes of Quebec, perfect to read during a Georgia holiday break when temps have been IN THE 70s. The mood was just right. 
• Marley, by Jon Clinch. Ohhh, how I loved this! If you have any love for Dickens or even just the Christmas Carol story, I highly, highly recommend it. Well written tale that weaves Marley's story perfectly into the myth you already know.
• Scarred, by Sarah Edmonson. This was my Christmas gift, a culty book by an author whose podcast I listen to weekly, and I finished it in less than 24 hours. So good.
• Flight Behavior, by Barbara Kingsolver. Just started this one but already it's amazing, making me laugh out loud. It's set in Appalachia and the main character is just a hoot. I have a feeling that, like most of Kingsolver's work, there will be deep meaning as I get further in. 

Today I'm back on the laptop, although I think it's going to be a very quiet day with my manager still out (she told me yesterday she tested positive!). Mom and Dad also have reported colds; we're waiting to see if they can kick it quickly or if they'll need to test, as well. I can't believe we're still not done with this virus, can you?

Oh hi, December, is it?

12/8 Wrapped a gift this morning. Not one I had bought, mind you, but one my Mom sent for Kate because she is on top of things. I am not fully behind -- I have placed at least one Amazon order and half of it arrived, my Christmas cards are printed and picked up, and my house is decorated. So that's all good news. Naturally, though, I feel wayyyy behind on shopping. I am hopeful to get a lot of it accomplished in the next 4 days.

Tonight, for example, after my bi-annual work meeting at a hotel across town (I'm guessing dinner will be over by 8:00...?), I will pop across the street to the mall and pick up a few things on Santa's list. Doesn't that sound light and breezy? It will be so FUN to go to the mall! Hooray for malls being open until 10 during the holidays! hahahahaha. And Shawn has suggested we go out together to look at things for our nieces (etc.) this weekend. So there is a light sketch of a plan, at least, and that makes me feel mostly okay. I don't think we'll FAIL at Christmas. 

Of course we will be traveling on Christmas Day. Home from Savannah. You know what that means: Pizza Rolls! 

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12/15 record scratch. I didn't finish the post. Life got in the way. This is the neverending story of these days. Let's see... the work meeting went well, although the mall was NOT open after 8:00 pm! So there went that. I have had to go IN to my new office way too many days lately. Although it's a lovely new place, I'm not loving having to leave the house again. And so many MEETINGS lately.

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12/17 I just this hour finished a project that has been WEIGHING DOWN my to-do list (work) for the past 3 months. It didn't have a firm deadline, but did require several subsequent tasks, and I just COULD NOT for the life of me start it. But now it's finished. Thank the Elves Above! Now, after today's Early Dismissal and pickup at Kate's school, which begat a somewhat impromptu trip to the Marietta Market for an 8th graders' lunch, including me driving two girls there and being asked to "watch out for" another girl whose mom was also juggling other things. It was nice enough -- and a lovely day to be eating outdoors! In December! 66 degrees, sunny! -- but of course set me back, work-wise. Eh, I thought, as I drove us home at 2:00, it was a long lunch, big deal. And where was that attitude all of November and these preceding weeks?? lol.

ANYWAY. I have now finished that task and can coast to the end of the workday (maybe) by getting things prepped for when I login again on December 29th AND NOT BEFORE. Hence, this draft finally getting finished. (We'll see.)

As I told Suzanne (remember that no one reads this blog but us, it's private), I have felt behind so often this last month or so. And I guess it's good to write that down for posterity. Every workday seems to be a race -- even when I've been working from home. Maybe especially when I work from home, because I try to do HOME things as well as WORK things. I have forty-three things I need to do, and 5.5 hours to do them, with 2 meetings on the calendar seems like every day. The worker-bee part of me says, "I should not DO home things on work time!" but the kinder, gentler me says, "Hey. You are allowed to live your life. You are allowed to take 30 minutes to workout or unload the dishwasher. Or sit, away from the laptop, to eat lunch." And again, you'd think that I'd have figured out the balance at this point in our pandemic lives, but somehow I haven't. Or, when school started back in August it all went out of whack. 

I haaaaate to go on and on about the same thing (tl;dr - Lee is in a busy stage of life). My sister told me over the phone that she's trying not to say the word "busy" anymore. She says, instead, that her days are "full." I like the sentiment, and I agree it's BORING to say, "I'm/we're so busy." Everyone is; shut up. One thing that helps me is to just keep telling myself to KEEP GOING. And that it will all end abruptly one day when the kids are up and gone, and THIS is the MEAT of a good, good life, the exact life I wanted and wished for. (Sometimes it helps.) Just one foot in front of the other, do the next thing due.

As discussed elsewhere, Christmas spirit seems to be hard to come by this year. Again, just want to record it for Future Me: 2021, it seems, isn't feelin' it. For me in particular, my kids are (still okay, as kids go, but) at an age that appreciates very little. That's hard. They don't seem to care or worse, they openly roll their eyes and sigh in my direction. [I'm laughing at my own joke, they're "still okay, but..." haha.] Guess I've not done a very good job modeling GRATITUDE. To the New Year's Resolutions List it goes. 

Okay. So, yesterday I put my Christmas cards in the mail, wildly without return addresses, so if they get lost, TOO BAD! I didn't have time to get the nice, rounded-corners-matte card stock; ours are just glossies from Walgreens. lol. The photo is one of all four of us that already got posted on Facebook, so everyone's seen it -- not to mention there's a random guy in the back that I couldn't crop out -- but they're done, and I hand-wrote a small message on EACH ONE, so take that! I think I have most of what I need for my own kids' gifts, and maybe even enough time to figure out the rest in the next couple of days off. 

First, I'd like to drink a large Peppermint White Russian, read some of my mystery novel (Bury Your Dead by Louise Penny, which I'm enjoying), and take a nap. Just as soon as I set my out of office. 

Here's hoping the brain cobwebs clear out and I start focusing on what's GOOD, real soon! Merry Christmas!

Lots of Proofreading and Memory-Making

It's a busy time for me at work. Our product catalog is in production, as well as another mini-catalog, so that means I'm doing a lot of proofreading. Most of our publications originate in Europe, so that means I change a LOT of "fibres" to "fibers" and "colours" to "colors." And all the "-ise" words to "-ize:" Realise, minimise, accessorise. It's tiresome, but easy work. I can put on an album and get into the flow of it. Our office has moved, but we're still waiting on final inspections before we can actually GO to the new building. I've seen my cute new office (I got a real room, not a cube, woo!), but I can't set my stuff up yet. I LOVE the idea of putting things away in an orderly new way. A place for everything (except all the old stuff I happily threw out) and everything in its place. I bought myself a little violet plant for my new desk (no windows, so it has to be something that does okay in fluorescents), and I have new school pictures to put in my 5x7" frames, so come on, building inspectors! For once, I want to be there! 

For a day or two. Then I want to work from home again. ;)

Updates: Band

Alex's senior marching band season has come to a close! Or, it will, tonight at the Fall Awards Reception. We made it! All the Friday afternoon/evening meals, all the competitions, all the football Fridays have finished, as well as our memorable trip to Orlando. The poor kids did not get to march in a parade at Universal  after all: Weather prevented it. I had seen the forecast for "90%" chance of rain, and thought, "Eh, it's Florida. It will rain for 10 minutes and then clear up again. This happens every afternoon." 

I was so wrong. It POURED rain from 6:00 am until 10:00 pm, non-stop and hard. And cold, for Florida. The high that day was about 65. But we put on our ponchos by golly and endured it, because we had paid money to be there! I guess the band kids were happier, even, because it meant more time on the rides than they would have had. 

Anyway, the Thrash family enjoyed our time at Hogwarts/Diagon Alley, drank our butter beer (yum), practiced magic with our $60 (!) wand, and rode every ride we could fit in. Most of them were simulators with 3D video, which I enjoyed at first. But I'm here to warn you: at age 47 after several of those in a row, the inner ear is not a happy inner ear. I closed my eyes in each of the last 5 or 6 rides we did, and breathed very deep, slow breaths. I still feel a little sick remembering it. 

On day 2, we hopped over to the Magic Kingdom, leaving Alex behind but happy to be in the Happiest Place on Earth. (We really did like Universal, though, and want to go back. Lots of rides were unavailable because of the rain.) I'm so glad we took Kate to Disney again. Last time she went, she was four years old. So this time was completely different -- we rode all the "roller coasters" they had. In quotes because Disney roller coasters are not very scary or big. She was scared of them! But brave! And we loved them all. Seven Dwarves Mine Train (a first for all of us), Big Thunder Mountain (my very favorite), and Space Mountain! We even stayed until the fireworks show (also a first! when the kids were little we never stayed late) at the castle. It was a Magical day, for sure. And we were so tired, after 2 days of it. But it was so worth it.

Volleyball

Club volleyball started last night with Kate's first practice. Here's what I was hoping for: All the moms who've done this before welcoming newbies like myself... someone asking where we live... perhaps finding a neighbor who asked did I want to carpool (the practice locations are a 25 minute drive for us)... coaches giving us parents a friendly welcome speech and "here's how it's going to work," and Kate receiving the $500 worth of uniforms I bought a month ago.

Exactly none of that happened. 

Maybe it will, on Wednesday when the practice is JUST our team (last night was a "master coaching" practice with a mix of several teams). But so far my eyebrow is raised. I can see 2 tournaments on the calendar so far, one local and one in Montgomery, which isn't too far away. So that's a positive...

Meals

When we got back from Orlando last Sunday, what sounded good and was easy was a good old spaghetti dinner. Yummy. The rest of the week we ate:

• Chicken enchiladas
• Chicken and Rice skillet
• BBQ shredded pork (bought for a fundraiser), which we've had two ways so far - once as sandwiches on buns, and once as a "pork plate" with green beans, baked beans, and King's Hawaiian rolls. There's still a lot leftover.

I'm planning one other interesting meal this week, which is:

• Pineapple Pork with Coconut Rice

I'd also like to make a tortellini/sausage soup recipe my sister sent me, but not sure anyone but me would eat it. Bummer. Maybe I should make some for my lunches.

Next week is Thanksgiving! Can you believe it?? We're going to Pensacola to be with my parents and I can't wait to make sausage dressing with my Mom, and Apple "Waldorf" Salad for my Dad. :)

Podcasts I Love

It took me a long time to get interested in podcasts. And I still only listen to them sporadically -- usually in the car. Sometimes on a walk. I don't like to "subscribe" to them, really, because then I'll feel like I'm "behind" if I don't listen on the day an episode drops. But when I'm in the right mood, there are a few that I really enjoy. I've found, lately, that listening to a podcast keeps me more calm than listening to SiriusXM radio, because the radio plays all the same songs and therefore, my mind wanders. Or, more accurately, frets. With a podcast, I can just fully immerse in whatever topic is being discussed, and the faucet of frets gets shut off. So, here are a few of my favorites right now, and what I like about them:

Terrible, Thanks for Asking - One of my first favorites. I haven't listened to it in a while, actually, but there have been some amazing episodes. They're generally about people's sad or difficult stories, which you think would be depressing. But it's not -- it's more like, "we're all in this together, and sometimes it sucks." I am a big admirer of the host, Nora McInerny. 

A Little Bit Culty, with Sarah Edmonson and Nippy Ames. These two have quite a story, as documented in HBO's The Vow, which we watched a year or two ago and LOVED. They were in a cult, but then they woke up, as they say. In fact, they were some of the whistleblowers who brought the cult down. And I'm so happy for them that they did. Their guests talk about things and groups that are either a little bit culty or a VERY LOT culty (they've had Mike Rinder, ex-Scientology guy, and Stephen Hassan, ex-Moonie). For this podcast, I really DO wait with bated breath for the next episode to drop.

The Dream - I'm not sure if I heard about this one from the previous one, but possibly. It's produced by a journalist -- one of my requirements for podcasts is that they're well-produced, not just some dude in his basement recording himself -- and season one was in the same vein as Culty: it was all about "The American Dream" as it relates to Multi Level Marketing/MLMs (culty!!). Super eye-opening. Lots of history about how MLMs came into being and how far they are embedded into the American culture and politics (it's pretty bad, y'all). Season 2 was about the Wellness industry -- potions and "treatments" and even multi-vitamins -- and equally eyebrow-raising. I hope there will be a Season 3.

Office Ladies - On a lighter note! Who doesn't adore Jenna Fischer and Angela Kinsey? When Kate started us watching (re-watching) The Office last summer, this was a fun one to start listening to. It's interesting to learn how TV shows are written, and sometimes they have guests who were in the show, which is fun.

Smartless - Big thanks to my sister for suggesting this one! It is, as she said, "complete brain candy," but still: who doesn't love Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, and Will Arnett?! No one, that's who. Each of them has a voice I could listen to all day, and they surprise each other with other big-name actor or musician guests, and they're just FUNNY. I mean, I think all of them consider themselves comedians, so that's bound to be good. 

Sharon Says So - Sharon used to be a high school government teacher, and a good one if her pod and Instagram account are any indication. I actually prefer her Insta to the podcast, but once in a while I like to tune in and hear what she has to say on a topic -- which include a lot of history, and random history, at that. Example: She did an episode about Jean Lafitte and the battle of New Orleans. She stays very non-partisan, but talks about current issues: I definitely appreciate that. And her episodes are usually short, which is good when I have a half-hour commute. ;) 

Unorthodox - Ohhh, these are my Jewish friends. I haven't listened to it in quite a while, but I do love it. I don't have any claim whatsoever to Judaism, except that my ancestry.com DNA test showed I have 3% Jewish DNA (!) and I had lots of Jewish friends in college and was always interested in reading about their faith tradition in books like (well, honestly, Are You There, God, It's Me, Margaret was the very first) The Chosen when I was in school, and Bee Season in adulthood (both SO GOOD). The three delightful hosts comment on current events from a Jewish perspective, which I think is so nice as it very much widens my own. And bonus, they're very funny.

Jesuitical - After I started loving Unorthodox so much, I felt a little guilty for not exploring my own faith tradition in a similar way, ha! (Guilt = appropriate for Jewish AND Catholic sensibilities!) This is another one I haven't clicked in some time. But my favorite part is when they do "Desolations and Consolations" -- each host talks about something that either bummed them out (Desolation) or made them aware that God is good (Consolation) at the end. Such excellent Catholic words. 

I've listened to other podcasts, as well. I suggested Harry Potter and the Sacred Text to my mom, and she liked it more than I did (I only listened to 2 episodes, I think). Also Leah Remini's Scientology: Fair Game, Mike Rowe's The Way I Heard It, NPR's Hidden Brain, Serial, when it was popular, and of course This American Life -- but they don't all compel me like the ones above. 

What about you? Got any great pods to suggest? 

Band-tober Continues

So much marching band! Since Oct. 14, they competed in their highest priority BOA competition in Alabama (came in 5th overall and 2nd in their class, which is not their best showing), played/performed at 2 home football games (those are the busiest, with Events feeding the kids both before and after), and had Senior Night, where Shawn and I got to walk out on the field with our Senior for recognition.

I had a painful blister on my heel in that moment because of setting up the Senior Night reception beforehand -- I stupidly wore "nice" shoes for all the pre-game stuff, because I couldn't figure out how/when I would have time to change clothes before the game. Also I hardly ever wear nice shoes anymore, thanks to Covid! [[Side note: The reception came together beautifully despite the early troubles. We had tons of help, we set it up in an odd location (gym lobby) but it looked really nice in the end with our balloon bouquets, the Pinterest-worthy die-cuts Allegra bought, and my idea of Mason jars with twinkle lights inside. We hadjust enough tablecloths. I got some beautiful frosted sugar cookies made, we gave each senior a small gift, and the food was perfect and perfectly estimated -- not much leftover! Best of all, since I am a senior parent, everyone was making a big deal about me NOT helping too much, so once the party started at 6:00, I was allowed to do no more! I enjoyed it!]] No blisters could dampen the joy of being there, celebrating this sweet, talented class of kids. I love that I know a few of them now, can recognize them when they come to sign in for their meals (never thought I would learn their names, like Luke and Davis and Michael and Carter and Ashley and Maggie and Sarah and Lily, and Rocky and Mason and Kate and Zeke). Not that they care who I am, but it's still fun for me. ;)

I am so grateful for the ones whose parents I consider real friends. Like, GOOD friends. Cindy and Dalia and Heather and Teigha and especially Allegra. I had hoped for this additional benefit of Alex being in band, but wasn't sure it was going to happen, especially with last year and Covid taking away all that time we could have been volunteering. We are trying like heck to get Kate interested in band for next year (she doesn't play a marching instrument but could surely play keyboard in the front ensemble, or join the Color Guard - no experience necessary!), just so I can continue hanging out with my friends who have kids younger than Alex. ;) It's a tough sell and won't work, I'm afraid. Kate wants to forge her own path and we understand that. But I'm going to really feel the loss of these daily interactions with these particular friends. I may have to volunteer with them for a few things on the side, next year, and will definitely have to do my best to get them together for lunch or dinner once in a while. I guess we will still go to football games; Kate will want to, and won't want us around her. We'll be free to go sit in our normal section with the band parents. I also think about the future: Who will Shawn and I hang out with once our kids are all grown and gone? At least one set of the band parents I know is a set I'd like to include in the answer to that question (Allegra and Lawrence). 

All this to say, the high school years are VERY short. I know we still have half the year left, but everything from now on feels like it's "the last" thing. The last football game. The last competition. The last Night of Jazz. Sunrise, sunset.

In the meantime! I pulled Kate from her piano lessons. It was a very, very fraught decision for both of us. But last night after having a few weeks off from it, she reassured me, "It actually wasn't that much fun anymore," so maybe I can stop feeling guilty. She had a say in it, don't get me wrong, but she didn't want to be the one to disappoint me or her teacher, so I had to make the call. Maybe it isn't forever -- maybe she will want to go back to it. But the scheduling, combined with her homework load, combined with She Never Practiced, and I mean Never, and therefore she often came away from lessons upset because her teacher was a little hard on her... it just didn't make sense emotionally or financially to continue. 

Her volleyball practices start soon, and she will be glad to get back into that. And basketball for St. Joe's has already started. Sports! Here we come!

This week and last, I have managed some meals. We eat at 7:30 or 8:00 pm, but at least we eat. You know what's getting harder? Keeping all the ding-dang PHONES turned off and away during a meal. Sometimes we'll get to talking, and need to look something up, either about our calendar or something more fun, like a movie quote or the definition of a word, and then, whoops, whoever looked it up has a moment and Snapchat or Twitter is open. I'll continue working on that. The meals are reeeeeal basic, but they still count:

• Easy Chicken Pot Pie with Bisquick topping (a handwritten recipe from a former coworker that calls for cream cheese in the filling, yes, please)
• Dr. Pepper Pulled Pork (not as delicious as I'd hoped it would be, but serviceable- it made a great taco yesterday for my lunch)
• Hello Fresh Carnitas Tacos - a request from Kate and SO yummy
• Crock Pot Loaded Potato Soup (Alex rightly says, "If I didn't know what this is, I wouldn't think it looked very good." It does indeed look like slop, but add bacon, green onions and cheese, and it's *chef's kiss*)
• Oven Baked (from Frozen) Chicken Tenders/Fritters, with a pasta side dish including some  zucchini I need to use
• Bulgogi Meatballs with rice & broccoli (if they ever stop carrying our Bulgogi sauce at Publix, we will be SOL and very sad)

Guess what? We have a trip coming up, right around the corner. We're going (with band of course) to Orlando for a weekend in early November. They'll march in a parade at Universal Studios and then get to play in the park for a couple of days, and we'll be hanging out with Aunt Kimmy and Uncle Art. I'm excited, when I can stop to think about it for a minute. We haven't gotten to go to Orlando in YEARS. On the 2nd day, we're going to Magic Kingdom (the band is staying at Universal). So, without Alex, but he'll have more fun with his friends anyway. Kate's excited about Disney, since all her friends go there all the time and she doesn't. We plan to pack the day and stay for the fireworks show at night, and we know we'll be bone tired but I think it's going to be worth it. 

Let no one say we aren't making memories this year! I'm grateful for a place to record them, here. I sometimes feel like my blog must be so boring, as mostly a recap of the run-around schedule. Why would you read mine when you have one of your own?! I don't take the time for insight or contemplation, or well-written phrases that make anyone laugh or bring a tear to your eye. I wish I were that kind of writer. But right now I'm a memory record-keeper, and that has to be okay.

Big Wins

Alex Update:

The Harrison High School Marching Band won their first competition of the season, with a huge score of 92.1 (usually scores are in the 80s)! It was a great night, a local competition here in our county. They worked SO hard. Just a week prior, we had seen the end of practice (a "Parent Performance," the night that we had our dinner party) and it was a sad, sad state of affairs. But hard work and adrenaline made it all come together and it was a beautiful performance. So proud of them! We go on to our out-of-town competition this Saturday.

Alex was also named one of the top 50,000 kids taking the PSAT for the National Merit Scholarships, and was recognized for that. Top 50K doesn't seem that great unless you think about the number of high schools in your own state, let alone the whole country. Then it's pretty impressive.

Kate Update:

After a harrowing day of tryouts -- mostly because she was shooting daggers at me the whole time -- Kate made the volleyball team she wanted to make. She was mad at me because I wouldn't let her try out for the National/Travel team. Her 3 friends from school were all trying out for that highest level (only one of them made it). But sorry, girlie, I still have a full-time job and I knew I simply could not make that work, especially since this is our first go-round with club volleyball. Still, she played her heart out and maybe the anger even fueled her to do better. On day 2 of the tryouts, I watched from across the gym as she was pulled aside during a drill. She went to the sidelines and the coach said a few things to her and then fist-bumped her. Kate smiled ever so slightly, but her whole body relaxed and got lighter in that moment; she hopped off to get back to the drill but I knew they had offered her a position on the team. And, oh, my heart just swelled with happiness for her. What a moment. 

My bank account may never recover from this, however. Did you know that sports (outside of the little Catholic schools' league we are used to) are Stupid Expensive?! Imagine me looking at the grand total just for the uniforms (because there are so many "optional" pieces that I know she will want) and blinking slowly, repeatedly. Yikes. (Mom and Dad, don't worry, we have it covered, it's just surprising.)

Shawn Update:

Yes, there is a Shawn update! He also had a big win this week, in that his Atlanta Cornhole League team, The Sigourney Fevers 2, WON the local tournament last night! I'm so happy for him and his buddies. I like that he has this way to relax and have a beer with friends during the work-week. And I love that they WON! They now go on to a state ... wait for it ... Corn-ament! ;) 

Me Update: 

My Events Planning band job is kicking my butt. Everything that can go wrong has gone wrong. My partner got Covid, for starters. We have a home game and a competition this weekend so I'm having to manage those without her (thank goodness there are plenty of volunteers). And our next event, Senior Night, has had hiccups as well (the location we wanted is unavailable; the caterer is unavailable). It will all work out but it's caused me to wake up THINKING in the middle of the night, and that's always terrible. 

Last night was the first one in a while that I've gotten to stay at home after work. Alex had his piano lesson, and I did run to the grocery store, but after that, I sat on the couch and read my book. A luxury! I'm reading The Book of Lost Friends by Lisa Wingate -- a book I picked up while just browsing at Barnes & Noble, and how long has it been since you've done THAT?! so fun! -- I really like it so far. I was tired from getting my flu shot the day before, so a night off was just what the doctor ordered. That was MY Big Win for the week! :)

Getting Through the Days, vs. Enjoying Tiny Moments of Joy

The days are long, my people, but the years are short. Gretchen is right.

The days are indeed long.

We survived the last week of September, although I cringe to even type that -- "we survived." Of course we did. The only difficult thing we had to deal with was a calendar with too many things on it. Not the Plague that still plagues us, or a death or a catastrophe. Why does my brain default to, "Just get through this long day," instead of waking me up with thoughts like, "Okay, today has some FUN stuff in it, like a Sales Meeting in a pretty hotel with your out-of-town co-workers, and then tomorrow we get to go downtown to the Big City to see a concert at the Arena! On a school night! That we bought tickets for 2 years ago! Wheee!" 

Instead I thought, "Ugh, I have to drive on the Interstate THREE days in a row and I hate driving on the interstate. Meanwhile, I hate to ask other people to rearrange their lives to pick Kate up from school because of this work meeting. Also, I don't even really LIKE Lauren Daigle's music -- and I feel awkward around the people we're going with, as nice as they are -- I wish I didn't have to go to this concert and be out late on a Thursday in scary downtown."

It could have been the pull of the moon if ya know what I mean, but I felt all week like I was pushing myself, that I was constantly behind, especially with my professional work (still trying to pound out 8 hours a day, which hasn't ACTUALLY happened since March of 2020, and I should be okay with that by now), and that I was surely going to crumble from stress. I didn't, of course. I got through it with the help of Shawn, and of kind friends. In fact, the meeting was fine, the Interstate was fine, the concert was quite good -- and no one upon no one knows or cares if I work 8 hours or not.

Tuesday was the best day. It was Alex's college visit at Georgia Tech, and I took the day off work. He loved the campus, and I think it energized his college search/application motivation... at least for that day. ;) We did the official info session, the student-led tour, had lunch on campus, bought a t-shirt, the whole works. He is not sure he wants to go to an engineering school, but I can see him there... maybe. We still have a few other campuses we want to look at, and a lot of work to do, application-wise. But that was a good day.

Saturday was the craziest: Alex had a 9 to 9 band camp day. Kate had a volleyball tournament across town. Shawn had invited friends to our house for a little casual dinner party. Thank goodness the work event for THAT day (oh yes, there was one) got cancelled. I left my own dinner party early to go help at the band camp concession stand.

Through the whole week, I was really trying to find tiny moments of joy. Here are a few I wrote down:

• A short walk with Alex in our neighborhood on Monday
• Talking w/my aunt Kimmy about an upcoming trip to Orlando
• Sitting on the front porch in the cooler fall mornings
• Being in a college bookstore (swoon!)
• Feeling "part of the team" (work)
• Listening to a great podcast while on the Interstate
• Driving safety
• Seeing a sunrise when getting the newspaper 
• The smell of making gumbo reminding me of the holidays and my mom

------

Last night Kate and I went to her first "clinic," or "Train for Tryouts," for a club volleyball team. One of the things I have loved about Kate's school volleyball team is her coach's emphasis on having fun. He's a parent volunteer coach, a really good one, and before every game, I heard him tell the girls, "Hey, let's just have fun out there." I think that's missing from so many kids' sports these days. And it was missing last night, I'll tell you that. This club, while not the MOST aggressive in the area, is definitely in it to win it. The 2-hour clinic was a fast-paced, drill-heavy workout, and Kate left it feeling like she isn't good enough and definitely won't make a team. I'm sure she will, but I'm NOT sure it's a good idea to commit to that level of difficulty. 

She says she still wants to try out, and while I'm hesitant, I guess we'll go to the next clinic on Wednesday. 

This week's evenings are packed with activity, as well, including one Alex just told me about this morning -- his induction into the music honor society at school. Also on Wednesday, ha! When I was planning our dinner menu this week, I decided that since none of us was going to be home at the same times this week, I did not need to plan any sit-down meals. I bought hot dogs and buns, pasta and sauce, pizza crusts and toppings, frozen black bean burgers, and we have leftover gumbo & rice from the weekend. It is WEIRD to not have planned a single weeknight meal! 

Monday Update

I read a really good book this weekend, called The Leavers, by Lisa Ko. I can't remember how it was recommended to me -- possibly the e-library recommended it based on something else I read -- but I enjoyed it a lot. It's about a Chinese American boy and his mom, and how he loses her when he's about 12 and gets adopted by a white American family who change his name and help raise him to young adulthood. I've already recommended it to both my mom and my sister so I thought I'd share it here, as well. Two thumbs up, it's well-written prose and sympathetic characters, and a true-to-life American story I've never really considered very deeply.

Last night I chose my next book; I have several on my Wish List, and the choice was between At Home in Mitford, which I read 20 years ago, and loved, and feel like is a calming, soothing setting and non-stressful characters, and Sharp Objects, which is the complete opposite of that (I watched the HBO series but never read the book). It's a murder mystery with some seriously damaged people. Heh. I think Mitford was the wise choice in These Stressful Times. 

Today on my list, besides work, which is ever-present:

AC repair. Our upstairs AC has been broken for 2 weeks. In Georgia. In the heat of still summer. Thankfully the last 3-4 days, temps have been very mild, but we did buy a window unit for our master bedroom to get us through, and the kids have five fans between their bedrooms. We've survived it but I am REALLY glad the repair guys are here this morning early. 

Fill 125 goody bags with candy and then tie them with grosgrain ribbon, for 8th grade night this Friday at the football game. 8th graders who may be interested in band come play in the stands with our high schoolers, and we feed them pizza and give them goodies. I like doing crafty things and am glad I took this particular task on, I just hope I can finish them by Friday! Maybe I'll do 25 at a time, as a work-break, a few times a day.

Sign Kate up for a few club volleyball "train for tryouts" clinics. Her life is about to be all-sports-all-the-time, because she wants to play both basketball for her school, and club volleyball. I wish she didn't want to play basketball -- it's a bit of a hassle to drive all over Atlanta to the various Catholic schools in the league... and I don't love a couple of the parents. But she's done it since 3rd grade so she might as well finish it out. She's not destined for high school basketball, I don't think, so this will likely be her swan song with this particular sport. And club volleyball -- the one reason I'm glad about it is that she may meet some girls who will attend her high school next year, and that will be a help as she moves from little St. Joe's to giant Harrison High. (KT baby!! In High School next year!)

Fall Concert tonight. Aside from all the marching, our band members are also in class, and have to show their progress. So tonight they'll march until 6pm, then have one hour to eat something, change into tuxedos and take their places on stage. Of course, Kate has (school) volleyball practice at the same time, so one of us (Shawn) will miss the concert. Bummer.

But as a result of all that, I barely have to plan dinner for tonight, yippie! The rest of the week we're going to eat these things:

Chili or chili mac -- the family standby! And it feels like fall, sort-of, so yay!

Pork Chops with Shake 'n' Bake (old-school!), field peas and rice -- Kate will complain about this meal but then will eat it and remember it's pretty tasty

Chicken Quesadillas -- because they're fast

Last week Kate mentioned wanting spaghetti Carbonara. I said that I couldn't eat it, being a person with high cholesterol. But I made it last night with whole wheat spaghetti, and then I guess it was so rich (and I'd worried people talking about egg yolks and bacon being fatty) that no one really ate much of it!! I myself had noodles with pesto instead. So now there's a lot of Carbonara left... and who is the person who mostly eats leftovers because she is at home? Me. Seems a shame that most of it will get thrown out. Oh well: at least pasta and eggs aren't expensive.

Hope you all have a good week! 

Oh wait! Edited to add some thoughts on groceries! In my area, we have noticeable shortages of:

• Gatorade and Gatorade Zero! For weeks! I think it has been about 4 weeks, actually -- the shelves are simply bare and we like Gatorade at our house. Can't find it in the 12-oz size anywhere. Google says this: "According to Beverage Digest, an Atlanta-based newsletter that tracks the beverage industry, several factors are behind the shortage: a particularly hot summer for much of the country, an increase in consumption tied to COVID patients, COVID outbreaks or quarantines among Gatorade production workers, and a tight supply...."  
• Mott's Apple Juice in small bottles. This week I found two 6-packs at Publix and bought them both, because they've been out for weeks, as well.
• Eggo Mini-Pancakes! This is my kids' go-to breakfast item because they can eat them with fruit, or syrup, or Nutella -- but NOPE. We are sorry this item is out of stock.

I'm Back to Checking the Curve Every Day, You?

What the hell, America?! Can we not BEHAVE and get this virus into the rearview, please? 

I worry every day that I'm going to get the phone call from school. The kids will one day talk about their memory of what it was like when a friend was "contact-traced" (v.). So many of them have been made to stay home for three days, or 10 days, or whatever the quarantine period is now. Even if they don't have symptoms. (But so many of them HAVE symptoms.) Last night I was at a band boosters meeting and a parent got that call from school -- at 6pm. The schools are working overtime to keep it OUT of the buildings, and yet it's still getting in! (We jokingly-not-jokingly spread our chairs out, away from him, after he hung up.)

And yet, we're not supposed to worry. The Bible verse I read TODAY, from the Sermon on the Mount, was, "Do not worry about tomorrow, tomorrow will worry about itself." Ummmm, okay, but.... (I asked for a grown-up Bible for my birthday. The only Bible I've had since I was a teen is a "teen" Bible. I love my new one, with its faux-leather cover and ribbon bookmarks, and thought I'd make use of it. So I'm reading Matthew and Romans, to start. The font is so pretty. I read about half a chapter at a time. Big thumbs up for the Sermon on the Mount. Half a thumb for the beginning of Romans, with alllllll the talk of righteousness and the law. But I'm trying to just take what speaks to me. It's nice. I take maybe 15-20 minutes in the morning, after coffee, as a work-break, and do that, plus the Calm app. I do think it helps keep me even-keeled.)

Anyway, stupid virus. 

We're good, considering. So far so good, I mean. I do think the kids will get COVID, or get contact-traced; they're bound to. Thank goodness they're vaccinated, and us too. We're wearing masks in places like Publix and Target again. I think Kate wears hers a good bit at school, maybe. I don't think Alex does. I don't know what to say or do about it. Should I make him? Probably. I have worn mine sometimes, and sometimes not, with events I've attended. The football game last Friday night, for example; I did when I was pressed in at the sides by the crowd. I took it off a few times while seated, mostly because it was 90 degrees out.

Work told us to stay home again as much as possible. We had a case at our office 2 weeks ago. 

I finally, FINALLY made myself a desk space at home. Only took a year and a half. It's not quite big enough, but it's muuuuch better. Faces a window, so I have good lighting for Zoom calls as well as for daydreaming. ;)  

I struggle with long-term planning. Week to week, day to day, I can do; it's the long-view stuff that I get stuck on. What to do with fall break... how/when to visit colleges... should we plan vacations... sometimes I worry our kids get a raw deal, since we don't vacation in exotic places. It's hard to justify exotic places right now, though. Can I get away with blaming the virus? Instead of admitting that I don't really want to plan or pay for such things? I'm going to try. "Oop, just when you were old enough to take nice vacations, Covid hit! Sorry, what a bummer!" 

State of the Garden and other Updates

Despite the extreme heat of the last 3 weeks, my garden still looks okay. This isn't typical for me! This year I have tried not to water every day, but to definitely water every other day. We've had a lot of rain, too. Most every weekend, I've added fertilizer to the water. Here's the state of things:

Tomatoes: We've harvested several, and they taste delicious. They've not all looked lovely, however; some have had cracked sides which I read is from.... too much water! They're too heavy and they just crack. A couple were attacked by squirrels or birds so they were pock-marked. Unless they were really gross, I've cut them up anyway and added them to salsa or salad (cutting around the eaten parts, obviously). I figure, not every tomato in a field is going to look nice, so why should mine? There are three more on the (single) vine at the moment, and last week I saw a blossom but I'm not sure if it will be fruitful.

Petunias: I cut them back by a lot 2 weeks ago and that helped. One pot in the front yard got destroyed when we had the pressure washers here in June. Another pot in the front just burned up and I replaced them with some white Vinca. I'm sick of deadheading them all but it definitely helps them bloom.

Lantanas: These two hanging baskets are the saddest things when they're thirsty! But even when they look nearly dead, a good soak usually brings them back. They've flowered twice and it looks like they might one more time (?). They're supposedly a butterfly attractor, and I'm disappointed to not really be seeing tons of butterflies - but at least they're still alive.

Impatiens: So pretty. So easy to grow in the shade. One in the far backyard looked peaked on Saturday morning but I tended to it and today (Monday) it seems a little happier. I've had to spray to keep critters from munching on that one.

Begonias: Flowery and big! No trouble from these guys at all, they just grow and bloom no matter what I do.

Coleus: These are on the front porch in the shade and I'm not sure if that's the best spot for them, but so far they're okay. I love coleus; the ones I bought this year are green and red.

Jalepeno! Kate convinced me we needed a pepper plant and she was RIGHT! We've used several in our weekly salsa. 

Japanese Maple and Bridal Wreath (3) bushes: These, we planted in the front yard where we took out all of our Bradford pear trees. They seem to be doing okay despite being mostly ignored by me (bushes = not as fun to tend as flowers). 

All in all, it's probably the best garden year I've had, spring to summer. Not sure what I'll do this fall. I would definitely like to plant some kind of bulbs, but I can't decide what type/color or where. 

In Band Mom updates:

I got the pizza place sponsorship, AND one from a chicken restaurant as well, woo hoo! I've learned that people respond better to phone calls and that persistence pays off. And that I don't ever want to be in sales. This week is the first football game and we are taking orders now to feed the kids on Friday afternoon before they board the bus. It's a lot of work and I'm trying not to be stressed about it. The hardest thing is that my co-chair took a full-time job at a school and therefore can't really do any of the behind-the-scenes work during the day, so it's now all falling on me. Argh. Kinda annoying but I am TRUSTING that it will all be fine. We get along well and it's kinda fun having a friend texting me constantly, I must say. I think the worst is really behind us, lining up all those weekly meal sponsors. 

In Extra-Curricular news:

Kate has joined her school's volleyball team! It's been exciting because she has impressed her coaches. They ask me, "Where has she been playing? How much experience does she have?" because they say she's doing so well. But this is her very first time! I think she loves it, and it's a pretty low-key team. Maybe it will lead to more volleyball for her. I feel good about that; especially since the Drama club is still on hold until at least January. 

The only bad part is that the practice schedule makes our weeknights a bit crazy. This is the first year where we just may not eat dinner together many nights. I'm planning casseroles, freezer things, and crock-pot meals as a result. I'm not mad about it. ;)

Sunday: Chicken Tetrazini, made with zucchini instead of mushrooms

Monday: Frozen black bean burgers or chicken patty sandwiches, and fries

Tuesday: Bulgogi meatballs with broccoli and rice, if I can remember to stop at Publix and buy the sauce which wasn't available at WalMart this weekend

Wednesday:  Crock-pot chicken soft tacos (chicken, black beans, salsa, corn in the crock pot, sooo easy)

Thursday: Maybe pasta, maybe Leftovers on Parade (I imagine we'll have plenty)!

Friday: Football game!

Saturday: Band tailgate and parent performance!

It's a very full time of the year/of our lives, that's for sure. 

His Senior Year Begins

 I've been thinking a lot about this moment lately.

Today's the first day of his senior year of high school.

I'll just be over here in my corner, silently dripping tears.

First 2 Days, Done!

The first 2 days of Alex's band camp are done. They were busy ones, with nighttime Events both nights. Hooray, the hard part is over! All we have left are 3 lunches this week and then one noon-2:00 event Tuesday next week. (...Until football starts.) I'm exhausted but happy.

Allegra (my co-director) and I were the last 2 people in the school building yesterday when we left at 9:15 pm. We had a potluck for 250 people in the cafeteria, cleaned it up, including "pulling trash" from all the cans and taking it to the back dumpster (I didn't know the phrase "pulling trash" until these days of volunteering/clean-up duty; very custodial). But I thought, as we walked out the door, THIS is the kind of thing that they always talk about that makes memories -- being out late, being exhausted together, but having accomplished a good thing. I was glad I was present enough to notice.

And Bless Kate: She is enduring this week like a champ. She came with me on Monday to the Directors' Lunch, and was properly bored. So Tuesday she elected instead to stay home in the morning -- she watched Gilmore Girls and made friendship bracelets -- but came with me in the afternoon to set up for the potluck. And she was really helpful -- earned herself a service hour! I know she kind-of hates all the focus on band/Alex; she's not very good at being a "background" character, lol. Next week she gets to go to the beach with her best friend's family and I'm so glad. She'll kind-of be their "special guest" so that will hopefully make up for this week. I did take her thrifting and shoe-shopping yesterday in between events, which was fun! (I had taken the day off work.) She helped me pick out a few things for myself, too. 

When I drive by the practice field at school, Alex is usually supervising his section. In his sunglasses, looking like he's in charge. Makes me so glad to see him developing leadership skills, growing and becoming. It's just one of the very best parts of parenting, isn't it? 

How to handle stress dreams/stress

What happened Friday was interesting. Some of these things are steps I have learned from reading self-help books, particularly Nataly Kogan's Happier Now: Acknowledge your feelings. Let them be felt. Find gratitude. Ask for help. Accept help.

Others of these things cannot be explained by science. They're either coincidental, or they're proof of God.

1. I had the stress dreams and woke up stressed.

2. I acknowledged the stress, to myself and to Shawn, and then here.

3. I found things to be grateful for anyway in my journal, as I do every day.

4. I wrote an email to the pizza place I am trying to secure as a band sponsor, feeling anxious/nervous about it, and sending it off with a wish and a prayer. (Nothing to do with anything, but got one task off my plate, relieving some of my stress.)

4. I asked for help in prayer, preceded by reading the Bible app Verse of the Day. The verse was Isaiah 41:13 "For I am the Lord your God, who upholds your right hand, Who says to you, 'Do not fear, I will help you.' 

5. I cried actual tears at this immensely directed-to-me message from God, Himself. 

6. I tried to then enjoy (accept) the feeling of being heard and helped. 

7. I felt a bit better. :)  I had other moments of feeling panicky during the day Friday (weirdly; I imagine a big shot of sugar that I had at lunch had a lot to do with it), but I took my time, took deep breaths, and ... yeah. Got through it. 

Stress Dreams

I had 3 different stress dreams, maybe 4, last night. Want to hear about them? No, I'm sure you don't. But I want to record them, for some strange reason. Maybe just to clear my head. 

1. Tornado. Big, dark grey swirling storm was visible and then was clearly a large tornado and clearly coming for the 4 friends I was standing with. We were outside a strip mall. Obvs we went inside, opening the glass door of a little cafe-type place, but the glass door and another big glass window meant we could still see the storm approaching. The only thing I could do was grab onto the legs of what was right in front of me, a cheap coffee table. I woke up before it carried anyone up into the swirl, but it was on top of us for sure.
2. Driving dream #1. Going down some odd red-brick road. I don't remember being in a car but I was moving forward, and then suddenly the road tipped upwards into a steep hill, and next thing I knew I flipped over and was face down on the bricks.
3. Band camp dream. I am chaperoning at the high school. (Alex's actual band camp starts in 10 days.) It's indoors and I'm having to find my way around the enormous hallways to a back-building theater. My Mom is also a chaperone, and doesn't know what to do, and Kate is there with us. The kids I'm supposed to be chaperoning aren't where they're supposed to be; the director asks me to do some errand for him; and then I notice that Kate is missing. I learn later she'd gone in a car with some teen I don't know, to play pickleball (yes, really. Yesterday I saw a sign in front of a church: "Learn to play pickleball! Saturday at 7:00"). I am mad at Kate and give her a stern talking-to about leaving without telling me.
4. Driving dream #2. Alex and I are driving in tandem on the interstate. He is leading. He doesn't take an exit ramp, but I do, then I realize it's headed straight UP (again), a hill but more like a vertical plane.... covered in ice. It is under construction and therefore doesn't connect to anything at the end, but is simply an edge. 

SO YEAH. That was fun. Dreams always sound less terrible when you write them out, but each one gave me panicky feelings and I woke several times.

I have been pretty busy, but haven't felt outwardly stressed, really. Still trying to say Yes and keep the girl entertained in this summer of no day camps. I took her to lunch with a friend yesterday, for example. But this morning when I looked at my planner, I had to laugh. Even though these tasks are not difficult ones, here's what it looked like:

I had thought lunch was at 11:30 but it turned out it was 1:45, which changed the timing of the ribs going into the oven for 2 hours. We baked a cake because it was Alex's birthday. Oh, also, I was supposed to be working a full day yesterday.

I guess that is an accurate indication of the way my mind feels this morning, with lots of things competing for attention. I will also detail them here, also to clear my mind. I apologize in advance. 

• Band Board stuff - must call the pizza place (4th one I've tried) to try to secure a sponsorship
• Need to take a day off work next week, to be available on the day we host a potluck for Band
• I just now remembered I will also need to make something to contribute to that potluck!
• I have to pick up tickets for an event at the bowling alley for the band kids.
• I need to schedule a mammogram.
• I should probably schedule a dermatologist appointment (basic skin check)
• Need to pick up some prescriptions, and get cash
• Wondering how my labs will turn out (cholesterol re-check after being on a statin for 6 months, fingers crossed)
• Kate is bored and not doing her summer homework to my liking, or practicing piano. How much attention do I give it?
• Kate needs me to return/re-order something from lululemon (that I didn't want to buy in the first place, too $$$, but Summer of Yes). Online returns are a PITA and I hate spending money unnecessarily.
• Alex's college planning. He needs to start looking at application dates, academic programs, and campus visits.
• Alex liked GA State Univ. but I don't know that I want him in downtown Atlanta.
• WHEN will we do these other college visits?!
• My actual job; I'm supposed to be going in 2x/week now, but this/next week, that is impossible. (Until school starts again, really)
• Our bathroom is really in need of a cleaning.
• My tomato plant is being gnawed on by chipmunks or birds; after months of tending it, I may get to eat one single tomato from the whole thing (out of ten that were/are growing)

There's plenty more on the to-do list I keep on my phone, but that's the basics. I feel a little better spewing all of it out through my keyboard, and don't expect anyone to offer solutions. I also know I TOOK THIS ON my own self, I have made this bed. I know I said before, if I just keep a positive attitude it'll be fine! Fun! Great! And that is true. 

My brain, however, reminded me overnight that, OH JEEZ, I am handling a lot here. Not to mention planning meals and groceries, lolz.

Welcome to the Back Half of the Year!

Uh, yeah. This year's half-over already!

I did a little review of June this morning in my paper planner and, I gotta say, it was a fast month! One of the things I wrote down as a "win" was this: Being more open to "yes." I haven't mastered that, not by a long shot, but there were a few examples. 

• On a random weekday, Kate asked if her friend Anna could come over to hang out. I would be working a full day at home that day AND we had an orthodontist appointment. But I said yes. Thankfully there was no additional driving for me, so I let her do it, even though it required a bit of set-up and a lunch out that I hadn't planned. 
• When she forgot a critical bag for her trip to Kentucky (stupid of ME, actually), I said yes to fixing it by overnighting the bag to her. Never mind it cost me $160. Never mind she'd only be there for 4 days. We live in the 21st century and things can be overnighted, so I did it. To make her happy.
• When Alex asked to have the whole clarinets section over the DAY BEFORE we left for vacation, during a busy work-week... I let him. He handled most of the setup (all I had to do was make one extra trip to the grocery store and hand him some serving bowls). It helped that he didn't ask me permission for the backyard activity of water balloons, because I might NOT have said yes to that... but actually he and his friends and his sister cleaned ALL of the pieces up meticulously afterwards. 

So even though it kinda makes me feel scattered and unplanned in the moment, saying yes was a good thing about June. :) 

Today I did something else rather spontaneous. I have been harping on Alex to work on his college planning, and he has been, slowly but surely. We set some deadlines for ourselves (him). I really do want him to take the lead but it is like pulling teeth. Anyway, this week he was supposed to start scheduling some campus tours. He asked me last night how, exactly, to do that, and I explained it to him (go to the school's website, look for an "Admissions" or "Visit" link, click it...) The fact that he asked that question made me think mayyyyyybe I need to just go ahead and get more involved. Which.... argh. But whatever. So today I hopped onto one of the websites for a local university, one of his top 6 choices, just to see if what I'd advised him was as EASY as I thought it should be. It was. I clicked "campus visit" and noticed they only had availability TOMORROW for a guided tour -- nothing in August. So I booked it. I asked him first, but good gravy, that was close. I think if we'd waited one more day we'd have had to wait until November. So at lunchtime tomorrow we'll be on a guided college tour! Yay!

Maybe there will be more Yes for the rest of 2021. I mean, I guess that will be up to me and my mindset. "Can-do" attitude goes a long way for motivation, I guess. Fake it 'til you make it. Yes, and. 

Interesting Title Here

It's the week before vacation week, a.k.a. the Longest Week Of the Year, and I'm feeling it! Lots to do at work, and more interestingly, lots to do for my second "job" for the marching band. Unfortunately, a couple of those tasks are phone calls and require me to ASK PEOPLE for things, which isn't ever fun. I could never be in sales, ever. 

First is to set up a party, which naturally falls to the Events coordinators. I'm less worried about that call, except that the first time I tried it this morning, I was holding-slash-being transferred, and I heard someone pick up the line and then hang up before saying hello! Ugh. I gave them 10 minutes and then called back, only to go to Voicemail. So that creates an additional task: Follow up. 

The second call is infinitely more daunting -- it's asking for a Large-Dollar-Amount Sponsorship from a restaurant, so that we can then order food for the band from them. That will require all of my Girl Scout Cookie Sales skills, for sure. On the plus side, all they can say is, "No thanks, we're not interested." But on the minus side, then I have to call someone ELSE. 

Well. I'm trying to have a good attitude about the whole thing in order to keep from letting it stress me out. "This is just for fun!" and "I totally wanted this job!" and "I'm just a PARENT, if I do a mediocre job no one can fault me!" and also a bit of, "Come on, ANYONE can do this and I am a SMART PERSON, so it is no big deal." These are the cheerleader-y things I tell myself. It's all oooohhhhh-kaaaaayyyyyyy. Breathe.

 - - - - - - - -

Next week while we're at the beach, I think I am going to take a 100% social media break. I'm sure I've done it before, and definitely want to again. I find, so often, that I am seeing the same posts again and again. There's nothing NEW. Even if it IS new, it's not that interesting, and certainly not critical to my life. And of course it makes me feel deflated and unfocused and bleh, if I allow myself to think about how I feel as I scroll along. Gross.

Social media is so complicated, isn't it? I'm not one to post every day -- far from it. I figure that's the best way to get yourself unfollowed, so I try to keep it pretty sparse. I post pics of the holidays, the special events, the kids' milestones. On one hand, I do want to share and celebrate our life with our friends ("friends") -- but on the other hand, I don't want to exploit my kids, one, or be too braggy, either. (I HATE braggy on social media.) Or think that other people CARE if, say, Kate and I wore matching shirts or something. I mean, it's silly, right? I definitely will not show you my painted toenails facing the ocean. 

And now that my kids are both also ON Instagram, I can't tag them without their permission, and don't want to embarrass them (further). I can't figure out the balance there. I could share photos of inanimate objects (books, my coffee cup, my garden), maybe the occasional selfie, but I don't have a "persona" or a "theme"... I do like the idea of capturing small moments and remembering them, but when I'm 90 will I want to see coffee cups? I just don't know. 

Anyway, I need a break from it. So instead of picking up my phone for Faceblech or Twitter or IG, I'll pick it up to TAKE PHOTOS of my family. I will pick up books instead. I will pick up playing cards or the newspaper. Or I will take a nap! Go for a walk. Visit a cousin in the condo across the parking lot. 

This is the plan! 

47 in '21

I definitely should have taken today off work - my birthday. Because it isn't even 9:00 am and I'm dealing with 3 ANNOYING work situations already, and have a meeting scheduled to start shortly. BOTHER.

This is a mistake I won't repeat! Grown adults should always take PTO for their birthdays!

If I had my druthers, I'd be drinking my 2nd cup of coffee on the porch, and finishing my book. (It's a good one!) 

Instead, I will power through this stuff, and then go to Starbucks for my FREE birthday drink (at Kate's urging, of course, so she can have a drink, too), and then probably work on my grocery list and menus for the next week. Don't worry, I find that a fun task. The kids leave for camp on Sunday, so there's gonna be some SPICY FOOD on the list while they're gone! (Do you think about spicy food, and how our taste buds diminish as we age, so we like spicy food more when we're older, as much as I do? I think about it a lot.)

Swift subject change: I just had to do something unpleasant (on my birthday!). I have a friend from college, my "big sister" in the sorority, actually, who is doing a MLM jewelry business. She's been leaving me not only text messages in Facebook Messenger, but also voice memos, so it feels more personal, asking if I want to host parties or buy X for just $10, or whatever. I've been ignoring them for the most part. I did buy some jewelry from her a few months ago, because I was looking for something hypo-allergenic and that's what she sells, but... some of it turned out not to be exactly what I was looking for, and it's not cheap. It was fine, I'm not mad about that, and happy to support her once. Anyway, she had left me a salesy message yesterday (which I ignored), and then this morning sent a Happy Birthday. Argh. I couldn't ignore that, so I had to say thank you, and also "I'm sorry I haven't responded to your other messages. I'm guess I'm not that interested....? Don't want to hurt feelings and I wish you well in the business but I don't want to host parties or anything." Ugh. Makes me feel terrible to write it but please STAHHHHP. (Is it too mean? I'm having Send-button regret! Ack.)

The weird thing is, she's a lawyer. Her husband is a successful real estate agent. It isn't like she depends on this money (I don't think). I just wish she wasn't' so pushy. (She always was kind-of a big personality, though, it fits her.) 

ANYWAY: Fun spicy menu options, let's go! 

Nearly every year they've gone to camp, I've made one of our faves that we used to eat regularly Before Kids: Shrimp Durango. It's super good, but I might need a break from even our once-a-year tradition of eating it. Other options I might try....

Chipotle Shrimp and Rice Bowl -- wow, that looks good. With some guacamole on the side....? Heaven.

Baked Buffalo Wings -- YUM. Definitely a favorite of mine and Shawn's, and I could even make homemade Ranch to dip them in (and bleu cheese for me). Better if I can make them without full-fat butter, and not fried... Or maybe we'll just go to Taco Mac. 

Fish Tacos -- I don't have a good recipe although this one does look good. Usually I use fish sticks, which we keep in the freezer, and make a jalepeno tartar sauce by mixing mayo, diced pickled jalepenos and some of their juice, garlic, garlic salt, and lemon juice. It's always a trial and error recipe but when I get it right, it's excellent.

Sweet Pork Enchiladas - I have a can of green enchilada sauce just waiting to be used... this would be slightly different from the usual enchiladas... but only slightly. It's a maybe.

The dinner-planning funk has been verrrrrrry apparent this last couple of weeks at my house, so it's nice to think about different things to try. Allrecipes.com is so old-school, isn't it? One of the first websites I remember subscribing to, in 2000, probably. 

I might rather eat out all 5 days they are gone, though. We shall see! 

Happy birthday to me! Forty-seven, my goodness.