Nothing to Say? And 2018...

We had an unexpected day off Monday, because of a threat of ice. Nothing at all happened, but it was lovely to work from home. (Except I hadn't brought home my laptop, so I had to drive to the office on Sunday night at 9pm to get it, after we got the school closing announcement. I really must start bringing that thing home every night. You just never know when someone's going to get sick or the weather will threaten. WHY don't I do this already? Because it's heavy.....so lame.)

I find myself wanting to write something, but don't seem to have much to say. I feel like my phone conversations are like that too, lately -- definitely want to talk, to Jill, to Mom and Dad, but don't have much to talk about, except the daily round. The weekend's activities. It's a life of doing, right now, I guess, without time to reflect and create feelings around the to-dos... just to do them and move on to the next ones.

It's good, really, and I do try to make time for introspection -- at my desk before I start really working, and on weekend mornings when I can get outside (where it's quiet) with my coffee and my Calm app/Bible app/journal/brain. But a lot of that time is simply a release -- a moment to be still, grateful, to breathe and let my mind wander -- rather than process big feelings (am I feeling big feelings lately? Not sure). I trust that the self-care of releasing and breathing allows my brain to process what needs processing. I hope so.

But as a result of all that, I feel like my 2018 has started completely Mindlessly. I did a small 2017 review in my pen-and-paper journal, and scribbled out some little, brief ideas about this year's goals:

• professionally -- Grow / Learn from my new Development Action Plan (ugh, terminology) which has me visiting clients (medical professionals) with another team member. To learn about marketing to doctors, essentially. Maybe interesting. And to also get some kind of Content Marketing certification.
• personally -- what areas need refreshing? Fitness, definitely. I've let it slide but I know I feel better when I'm active  -- what do I want to focus on (4-6 things): being PRESENT for both kids and for Shawn. More self-compassion practice. Trip to Seattle. Maybe making up the trip to Disney. Whole Life Challenge/creativity in the kitchen. Back Porch remodel.

And that's as far as I've gotten. Doesn't feel very deep, but maybe it doesn't have to.

Moving on.

This week's menu is pretty decent, in the 2-week build-up to the next Whole Life Challenge... let me share it for your perusal:

Sunday - We had Lag Liv's Mexican Rice, for the 2nd time, and it was well-received again. Yum  yum with Fritos.

Monday - Breaded Chicken Breasts. I used to make this when I was newly married, and I remember thinking it was one of my "fancy" recipes. It sort-of is, but... not really. Served with frozen broccoli and parmesan noodles.

Tuesday - Took the kids to Jason's Deli, where I tried their new Papa Verde Sweet Potato. Oh my! This thing is delicious, people. Totally worth missing out on their awesome Salad Bar to try it.

Wednesday - Chili with rice!

Thursday - Is an eat-out-between-activities night.

Friday - Crock Pot Tortilla Soup. Have made this so many times, even I'm a little tired of it. But no one complains! I'm sure I'll freeze some and then eat it during the Challenge, even though it has beans and corn.

**I've been writing this post for 3 days. Yesterday at work I got nothing done and today has started out similarly, plus a server difficulty that was frustrating, so I've got to get out of blogger and get going. Some days are like that, even in Australia, I guess.

Update: Allergy/Asthma, says the Nurse Practitioner

The best thing about the doctor's appointment was I met with an NP who told me she herself has FOUR cats, and a young son with asthma. So it kept the (dumb) guilt factor out of the conversations. I've heard doctors before say, "When people knowingly have allergies to pets, but they have pets anyway, that's their fault." It may be true, but it's not very nice to say.

Anyway, I'm armed with Singulair, Symbicort, albuterol for emergencies, and an instruction to not let the kitties sleep on my bed (or in my bedroom, probably). She admitted that part would be hard. Last night Ash snuck up onto the bed and I didn't even realize it until I woke up, so... yeah. But we'll get it worked out.

I should have known it would happen, really, but no guilt. The kitty love is worth it.

Allergy / Asthma?

In other news, my allergies might be flaring up.

We went two months with the cats and I had not a single allergy symptom. I was taking Claritin or Sudafed every day and felt absolutely fine, even with them sleeping on my bed, even spending lots of time (as much as possible, really!) petting them, and even allowing myself to deal with the litterboxes (because despite all their promises, the kids don't just "remember" on their own to do it, surprise surprise). (Supposedly there is a lot of histamine in feline urine, and isn't that a pretty sentence?)

Anyway, I was fine. Hooray for cats! I do love cats.

The night that we had snow, our power went out for about 5 hours. Being Christmastime, I had several candles around the house already, and I lit about 6 of them, downstairs. We all kind-of camped on the couch during those hours, with the candles. Sure smelled nice! The kitties did come around, and they curled up on the couch with us for an hour or two. Around 11:00 pm, still in the dark, I noticed I was wheezing a bit. I felt sure, since I'd had no trouble with the cats so far, that all the candles were probably affecting my breathing. (At this point I was a week into taking a generic Zyrtec -- I don't know why I bought it instead of Claritin, but I did.) So I blew most of them out, and the power came back on after a little while longer.

(That day I had also vacuumed downstairs pretty thoroughly, which probably kicked up a lot of dander in the living room and on the couch.)

But my lungs still haven't really recovered. It's been more than 2 weeks and I've been carefully NOT lighting candles, but I've had this tiny little wheeze ever since; if I get to coughing, it gets worse. One night I was miserable, and miraculously found an old Albuterol inhaler, which I used. (I think it was Alex's, actually, from one time he'd been sick as a toddler.) I'm trying NOT to use it, but I've used it more than twice. It helps a little. The wheezing is worse at night.

I'm back on Claritin now and really hope it kicks in. I want to just tough this out and am hopeful it  will go away on its own. But if it doesn't in another week, I guess I'm going to have to see a doctor. (Side note: In my 20s, a primary care doc had diagnosed me with a touch of allergy-related asthma, and given me a prescription for albuterol to keep around, just in case. I had a few attacks of wheezing when I visited friends with cats. But 3 or 4 years ago, a different PCP, whom I didn't particularly like, told me I did NOT have asthma, and she didn't know why that previous doctor thought I did. Hmph. I'd like to go breathe on her now and see what she says.)

Am not happy about all this.

Work break

I'm taking a small break from the product descriptions I'm supposed to be writing, even though I've not made as much progress as I would have liked today. Oh well. It's such a frustrating process:

1. I find the barest of information from our Textiles designers on a server in Germany (thankfully it's in English -- well, Germish).
2. I copy and paste the basics into the Excel template I need to prepare. Easy step.
3. Based on the Textiles info, I then write the Product Description (at least 75 words), taking care to included proper keywords; the Meta title (65 characters); the Meta description (155-320 characters); and 5 bullet points (Unique Selling Points) for each of 50-100 styles per season, once in fall and once in spring. If I'm lucky, I have a set of physical samples of the products that I can look at to ensure accuracy. 
4. If there are any color extensions of previous styles, I have to add those in. Half the time I don't know where to find out. Check for any particular USPs for new colors; edit meta fields to include correct new colors.
5. Do a huge spell check and format the file correctly.
6. Do a huge Find/Replace from US to UK English (I'm supposed to provide the UK version, even though I live in the US, lol. What's worse is that, once it's uploaded to the US site, the person in charge of the US site doesn't ever change those spellings back, so we have "colours" and "favourites" and "accessorise" which makes me crazy.)
7. Send it off to the e-commerce guy, who doesn't even look over it before he uploads it (I assume).
8. (I don't even know how the translation to German, French, Danish, Spanish, Dutch and all the  other languages takes place.)

After that, I hear all kinds of comments about how this or that isn't accurate, or this style has been cancelled, or this new one has been added in, and I take it all personally, even though I've done my very best.

I both love it and hate it. I love it because it's a good lot of work and keeps me busy, and makes me feel like I know things. I hate it because of everything I said above.

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It helped me to type all that out, so thanks for reading or skimming -- or skipping -- it.

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We spent our Christmas in Savannah. Well, just a couple of days of it. Drove down on Saturday morning, and came back Monday (Christmas Day) in the afternoon. I don't know how I feel about it. It was lovely in many ways -- Christmas Eve dinner around Nanny's table was particularly poignant and nice. 

I do love my mom-in-law and I feel bad for her, she's had a really tough run of it lately. Since about 2013 when my FIL got sick, and probably long before that, to be quite honest. She's so kind and sweet and good. She's got some habits that drive Shawn and me both crazy, and, as is usually the case, they seem to be getting worse as she gets older. She needs help around the house and my BIL refuses to help her, though he lives only half an hour away. We feel like he should be at her house at least a few times a month, especially since October 2016 when Hurricane Matthew dropped a tree on her roof. She hasn't lived in her house since then, until just this past weekend, because we were coming to visit. When we arrived, she and the friends she's been living with were in a frenzy of cleaning. Vacuuming, dusting, bathrooms, mopping -- because of course she hadn't gotten around to it yet. We definitely caught them all off-guard by arriving early, and I know she was trying to make it seem like she was ready all along. 

We presume that she wouldn't have moved back at all if we hadn't said we were coming. And maybe that would have been easier for her, but we thought we were doing the right thing, going to see her out of love and respect. You know? We don't want her to feel unloved by us, or lonely. She can't or won't come up to visit us, for some reason. It's really hard to know what to do, and where it's all going to go next. We probably should plan some more weekend trips to help her put things away (including her mother's things, who died this year, another emotional blow) and/or sell/trash other things... but we also have our own lives here, with plenty to keep us busy on weekends, and not a real huge desire to get involved in her mess down there -- it's not much fun. Of course, we're called, I guess, to GET INVOLVED IN THE MESS, as Christians. God got involved in our mess down here on Earth at Christmas, in fact (I learned that from an Advent prayer program, didn't think of it myself. It convicted me a bit, I'll admit!)... but it's hard. I love you, Shawn, and I love your Mom. I want us to do right by her. It's hard to know what to do, though, isn't it? 

The kids had a good time in the two hours we visited with their little cousins. There wasn't enough time to visit with their Gammy, but I know they were happy to see her. And they enjoyed the opening of presents (Santa made it). Shawn said at one particularly frustrating moment, though, that 'we won't be going down there for Christmas again,' and... I was not sad he'd said it. I'm not sure I want to send the kids to her house for a week in the summer, either; I just don't know that she can handle it, or that they would have a good time sitting in her house mostly, with the secondhand smoke. 

So pray for us, that we know the next right thing.

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It helped me to type all that out.

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We have no major plans for New Year's, except that I get to have Jan. 2 and 3 off work. So next week will only be a 2-day week, hooray! I don't mind working THIS week since I get so much of next week off. I mean, I would RATHER be at home enjoying the rest of the holiday, but I'm okay here. 

Better get back to my descriptions so I can get them done before the deadline (Jan 8).

Snow days, Christmas prep and whatever else comes to mind

This time last week, we were anticipating snow, and SNOW it did!

Friday, Dec. 8, 2017 | Early release from school!

In total, we got around 8.5 inches at our house, while the area where we live officially reported 12 inches and I'm not surprised. It was gorgeous, but only because we made it home before the roads turned icy. I was feeling that old post-traumatic stress in the last few miles of our drive home from school, but nothing some hot pizza (thank you, Shawn!) and a little Kahlua in my afternoon iced coffee couldn't cure. I managed no work the rest of the afternoon, although I tried.

Shawn and the kids built a snowman - it was a great wet snow for building and for snowballs - and the power even went out for several hours. I regret that we didn't build a fire in the fireplace (we really need to get it inspected before next time), or make hot cocoa or play board games like the fairy-tale power outage families do, haha. It was around 6:30 pm so we mostly camped on the couch under blankets, listening to a Brian Regan comedy show via Shawn's phone, which still had some battery power. After 2 hours, the lights came back! ...And then went out again. We all slept on the couch with lots of candles burning and kitties purring, until around 11:30 pm. Mama's back was SORE. 

Saturday we cleared the driveway so that we could drive as soon as the roads were safe. Honestly, I was so glad to have another full day of being stuck in the house. After all the busy-ness I've been complaining about, it was good to balance me out. The kids didn't even whine too much ;).

And just like that, it's the middle of December! We're doing okay with our Christmas shopping, although I definitely still have a few things I need to hurry up and buy/wrap/ship. As always. 

We're going to be in Savannah on Christmas Eve/morning, driving back that very day so that I can come back to work on the 26th. Sucks, but eh. I'm off next week instead, the 19-25th, and the week of New Year's, and the quiet at my desk on the 26-39 will be helpful as I try to write a bunch of words for our next fashion collection, due January 12. Every day from now until my vacation, I have lunch plans, so that's fun. ;) 

Here are twelve things I love about this year's Advent/Christmas season:

1. Santa's White Christmas coffee, and coffee coolers (iced coffee)!
2. Our wooden Advent calendar. I didn't get it out last year and I missed it. Found some good candies to fill it with this year, and I have had fun writing up dumb Christmas jokes, too. Even snuck in some spiritual prep for the kids on a few days, like "Be a good elf: See how many people you can help today."
3. The Atlanta Christkindl German Market! I got to go yesterday with my lovely friend Shan, and drink Gluhwein during the workday! Our company's German, after all.
4. Amazon Prime, like everyone else. I do wonder if UPS and the people who work for Amazon logistics hate Christmas, though.
5. TheGrommet.com - found some cute things there!
6. Kitties!! I have a trip to Petsmart on the to-dolist, to buy them stockings and treats! LOL Also, they've not eaten/broken any significant Christmas decor yet.  
7. Being away from choir commitments on Dec. 24-25. It is SUCH a relief that we won't have to be at church all afternoon on the 24th for the children's Mass (Kate's choir), and then me, again, from 10:00 pm until 1:00 am for Midnight Mass! SUCH A RELIEF. 
8. I'll still attend the choir Christmas party, of course, which is this weekend, Shawn. ;) Reminder. The really nice thing is that for once, it is NOT a potluck! The odd thing is we'll have to work around (Edited because I was wrong about the dates.) Alex, who's attending a (co-ed) party of his own peers the same night! 
9. Being Santa. I think we've thought of some good gifts this year. We're taking them all down to Savannah (well, almost all - not the bball goal), kind-of a pain, but as they're getting older it gets somewhat easier. It's true that presents get smaller but more expensive. ;)
10. Anticipating plenty of time off, and baking cookies next week.
11. Anticipating lots of READING under a blanket (loved Pride & Prejudice, btw, and also Longbourn, which I'm reading now).
12. Letting go of the need to send Christmas cards. I mean, I'm still feeling a bit of guilt about it, but not as much I could be. The world will go on without my professional family photograph, carefully selected design and matte finish, rounded-corners card with a Shutterfly logo on the back. I'm sure of that. 

Merry Christmas!

Oh what a ___ morning

Haha. It was like Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day at our house this morning. Only it was Katelyn. First off, I couldn't do her hair right. She washed it last night so it was too clean; wouldn't hold in any kind of a braid, and she wanted French braids which I'm only marginally good at, anyway. After three attempts, I got frustrated and teary, unfortunately, and we had to abandon that enterprise. I know I made her feel bad but I totally didn't mean to. Sorry, Kiddo. Next, we had to give Apple the cat some eye medicine for her conjunctivitis (!). Her ears went back but she let us do it, and that was the least stressful event of the morning. Poor Kate then dumped a full glass of oj on her school uniform, and had to hurry upstairs, breakfast unfinished, to completely change her clothes while we mopped up the mess. Finally, when she was rushing to get into Shawn's car with her heavy as crap backpack, and a big jacket because it's super cold all of a sudden, somehow the door got pretty much slammed on her arm (I'm still not sure I understand how this happened) and she burst into tears.

It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad morning. My coworker said kate definitely deserved a go-back-to-bed, do-over-tomorrow, and I agree.

I guess we survived. It feels like every day this week has been a little bit nuts. After school, mostly, although there's been some extra stuff during the workdays, too. On Tuesday for example, we had our usual basketball practice at 6 pm, then gymnastics at 7:30, with an Alex-handoff in-between, in the parking lot. This week, there was also a Tuesday Advent supper at the school so I had to remember to bring in my potluck contribution (a salad). Not a big deal and it was nice to have dinner there, instead of fast food. Of course it was raining, so getting from one building to the other was wet and cold. Then at gymnastics, Kate fell a couple of times and wasn't seriously injured, but when she got into the car she had a little meltdown, telling me, "I try to be funny when I fall, but ....it actually really hurt and it still hurts..." and I totally understood that. It's just too much, sometimes, to put on a brave face. I think it's what we do every day -- trying to wear the mask that says, "Yes, I'm handling all these commitments and homework and heavy backpacks" -- and in my case, "Yes, I'm totally capable of working full-time and volunteering at school and driving the kids around everywhere and also trying to make sure they have some fun..." -- but the mask is hiding our truth, which is: OMG, I'M TIRED.

Saturdays/Sundays are no better, usually, with basketball games and necessary shopping and groceries and church and laundry. (Thank you, Shawn, for handling laundry.)

I'm dismayed that Kate at age 9 is already feeling the pinch of trying to "do it all." Although I think without the injuries this Tuesday, she might have been fine. She's tired, though, and it's showing. Both kids have tiny little colds that I'm willing NOT to get worse or spread to the grown ups. She told me she would definitely be going to bed early tonight. I pray she'll honor that, for her own sake.

And I'm looking forward to the time off coming our way in T-minus 12 days!! Jesus, take the wheel.

At last, Pride and Prejudice

For all my big talk about books and love of literature, I've never read Pride and Prejudice! Never! Jane Eyre is my favorite of all time -- I think I've read it 3 times -- but never P&P.

So today I downloaded it to my Kindle. (Hooray for Amazon Classics costing $0.00!)

One reason I chose it is that I just read Anne Tyler's A Spool of Blue Thread, which I thought was a complete waste. Totally disappointing. So I wanted something "meaty." The other reason is that I also saw this book -- Longbourn, the "downstairs" account of the events in P&P -- and that intrigued me! But I won't allow myself to read it until I read the original.

I've had a fun year reading free e-books through my county library. Want the mini-reviews?

1. Time Traveler's Wife - loved it. I had tried to read it several years ago and couldn't get interested, but once I did, I didn't want it to end.
2. Scythe - YA dystopian fiction that Alex chose on a table at the bookstore. Was awesome.
3. Shadow of Lakecrest - chose it because it was on sale for .99, and really liked it. Think about it still.
4. Man Called Ove -- loved, obviously
5. The Heart Goes Last - weird Margaret Atwood. Too weird.
6. Good Harbour - awful, sappy, cheesy annoying "ladies who are friends at the beach" story
7. Hagseed - awesome Margaret Atwood, loved it (from the Hogarth Shakespeare re-imaginings)
8. Life Below Stairs - meh. non-fiction and dry
9. The Goldfinch - I think it's controversial! some people hate it! But i loved it a LOT. Deep and sad and intriguing
10. Code Name Verity - loved it. WWII fiction with female heroes, set it England/France? of course it was good!
11. The Secret History - since I liked The Goldfinch so much I thought surely another Donna Tartt would be good. It was a good story, but not as heart-rending as the other one, I thought. Still, the setting in New England was lovely and the characters... weird and interesting.
12. Station Eleven - kept hearing about it online. It was only OK, I thought. But nice how it had several plotlines that came together in the end. I love when books do that
13. Remarkable Creatures - as much as I adore Tracy Chevalier, I was not planning to like this one. The preview descriptions just did nothing for me. But then I loved it! Read it at the beach, which was perfect.
14. Room - excellent. Disturbing.
15. The Arsonist - meh. just something to tide me over. I think I read the whole thing in 5 hours on the way home from the beach
16. A Game of Thrones - as epic as its reputation on TV. loved it. can't decide, however, if I want to read the rest.
17. Chains - Alex read for school, and recommended. Excellent. 
18. Bridget Jones Mad About the Boy - so nostalgic to go back to Bridget Jonesey. Fun read.
19. High Mtns of Portugal - one of the weirdest stories I've ever read. There were 3 distinct sections, and they came together in the end, but they were all totally bizarre (and sometimes boring)
20. The Glass Castle - already reviewed. Excellent.
21. Wild - loved it
22. In the Unlikely Event - renewed my love of Judy Blume, and a fascinating (based on true) story
23. State of Wonder - only okay. I wanted it to be better. Total bummer of an anticlimactic ending
24. Spool of Blue Thread - disappointing and banal

Pride & Prejudice will be book #25 and might take me through Christmas. I'm pretty impressed with myself - it's the most I've read in a lonnnnng time.

Any recommendations for next year?

I might be going a little crazy

I find myself with nothing to do. We have projects in limbo because of yet another "re-configuring" of our work, this time led by a top exec in the company who... still hasn't hired us a Director of Marketing. Instead, she's decided to start making sweeping declarations herself. Such as, the product catalog we've produced every year for millions of years will no longer be produced. The Magazine-of-Much-Angst which we decided NOT to print any longer, 2 years ago, may now come back into print production. Slash! this brochure. Cut! that brochure. While we're at it, we're going to rework all 12 global websites in 12 languages and do that all by April 6, she declares. With a flick of our magic wands, apparently. 

Anyway, no one's assigning work right now as we await further instructions/clarifications, and the work we had been planning to do might not need to be done. Our Content Strategy could be out the window, despite all the work we've done to get it in place. Just because. Or so it seems.

It's super fun. Anyway, I've been online reading and reading to keep occupied, everything from "how much should I feed/bathe my cats?" to the usual reactions to mass shootings (how sad that we have "the usual" reactions). But at the moment it seems a lot of websites aren't loading. Such is the life of a desk jockey like myself. Sigh. Look busy.

At my lunch break I went to PetSmart again. ;) It's right across the street from my office, which is very handy, and they so kindly emailed me a $10-off coupon after taking my email address the first time we visited. It expired tomorrow, so I wanted to go spend it. Nothing exciting, just 2 more bags of dry food (one kitten and one adult), 6 little cans of wet food, and ... another set of kitty dishes. I couldn't resist, Shawn, I'm sorry. They are cute and now we can stop serving the wet food on my 2 random little pieces of yellow Fitz and Floyd china. HA! Everything matches. We are now pet owners from Pinterest.

I had to make the cats' feeding area cute because the current dilemma of the day is what to do about them while we're at Disney in 3 weeks, for 5 days. We're asking a neighbor if she wouldn't mind feeding them (and thus, be in our house and see the pet feeding area and it needing to be cute). We don't feel right about boarding them, this early into their having found a home. And gosh, I love those little critters -- the actual thought of being away for 5 days makes me sort-of want to ...stay home! Don't tell my mom! Not really, but... I'm crazy, right??

Leave the cats reluctantly to go play with a giant mouse. Heh. 

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In other news, we have a teenager in the house. He feels he is old enough to express his opinion to me now, which is a good thing in the long term but not so wonderful sometimes in the short term. I don't want to dwell on the specifics of just how he's judging me, but I'm trying to remind myself that he's growing his independence and learning to test his limits just as he should. He said it lovingly (I think?) and meant no disrespect, but it hurt a little. 

Oh, alright, I'll tell: it doesn't make sense without the context. He said he respects my parenting and all, but gets annoyed when I give in to his sister sometimes. It didn't really bug me so much immediately - I told him that there are days when I just don't have the energy to fight with her, and I choose my battles - but the more I think of it, the more it bugs me. Last night when Kate was giving me The Business but I was Sticking To My Guns, Alex then had the gall to stage-whisper "good job!" to me as she went on and I didn't. !!! The nerve. I mean, encouraging nerve, and of course he's probably right, but. 

But.

As for Kate, she learned that she can, indeed, boil water and egg noodles even though she's only 9, when meatloaf and mashed potatoes (nor any "non-dinner" thing like yogurt and sandwiches and cereal) are not to her liking.

So that's how the kids are. Otherwise great -- basketball and drama are in full swing, so Saturday mornings are shot for a while, but still, that can be great. I'm eager to Stay somewhat Present in all of the busy-ness and taxi-driving, and to enjoy This Time of Their/Our Lives, because I know, I KNOW that when it's all finished, it's finished and you can't ever get it back again. Some days it's a challenge. Especially the driving. But we keep on plugging, and juggling the drop offs and pickups as best we can, saying hello to each other, Shawn and me, when we remember to (sad sad sad) and just marching to the calendar. Every time a new Thing pops up needing to be done (a form, a donation, a volunteer opp), I either:

1. Remind myself that it's OK to say no sometimes, or

2. Immediately set a reminder for the Thing on my phone.

Update, and Halloween notes

The cats sleep on our bed. ;)

I was alllll determined, when we first decided to get them, that our bedroom door would have to stay closed, due to my allergies. 

That ended on about the 2nd day. Maybe third. The last few nights, I have woken up with a cat (sometimes two) nestled up against my legs on top of the comforter. 

It's hot. 

But it's the sweetest and I love it.

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Happy Halloween! We had a "Potluck and Costume Contest" at work and exactly four people dressed up. My costume was chosen because it was easy and I was not in any way TRYING real hard (I wore, at Shawn's good suggestion, a Thrashers sweater and said I was the "Ghost of an Atlanta Sports Franchise," ha ha)... but at least I tried A LITTLE. Not even the guy who concocted the event was wearing a costume. LAME! Everything here is lame. (The food, at least, was decent.)

The kids will trick-or-treat tonight, in our own neighborhood, and I'm hopeful there will be lots of other families out. It's my year to stay at home, woo! Because of the kitties, I'm going to sit on the front porch so I don't have to open the door a million times. They're microchipped but we don't want them getting out! 

Kate fussed that we didn't bother getting a pumpkin to carve this year. I told her, "Yeah, but instead I got you a BLACK CAT."

We Got Our Kitties!

Shawn said that as soon as he read that headline, he knew it was a done deal. ;) He was right. We took the (overly expectant) kids to the shelter on Saturday, and after an extensive tour, meeting every kitty in the place (it's a really lovely, impressive place with nice volunteers), we settled on the ones we wanted. Each kid had found a cat that made them happy.

After that, we made a trip to PetSmart and gave them a whole bunch of our money in exchange for 2 crates, a scratching post/tree, food, food bowls, litter boxes and litter, and some toys. We could have easily spent more than the $250-ish we spent! And we were trying to be conservative! So fun.

So, Ash and Apple came home yesterday and they're just as sweet as can be. Apple hid out under the guest room bed most of the afternoon. They had warned us she would be skittish and scared at first, and she was. (She'd been adopted once before, but sent back to the shelter 6 months later for not using the litter box, a fact that made Shawn very skeptical. Me too, if I'm honest. They told us she had no medical reason for that misbehavior, though, and always used the box while she was AT the shelter. I hate that someone brought her back! I'm sure she was upset and nervous when she saw our crate.) BUT by 9:00 pm, and with a little wet food and a treat to tempt her, we got her to come out and eat something. She was actually really friendly, purring and rubbing and wanting to know us. And this morning she'd used the box! No problems so far!

Ash is a kitten, around 6 months old, and has had his share of issues. An eye infection, but thank goodness he'd just finished his round of eye drops for that! He was also having a kitty cold, sneezing and drippy nose, this past week. They sent us home with a bottle of liquid antibiotic. HA! We haven't owned cats EVER and we're taking medicine on already (liquid, 2x a day)?! I told the adoption counselor I felt sure that if I could get medicine into my 2 kids, I could get it into a cat. She was impressed that we were willing. And it's been fine, using a towel to hold him, aside from a little scratch on Shawn. Only 7 doses left. He's totally friendly and curious and wants OUT to explore.

We had to put them in separate rooms, so Ash is in Alex's bathroom and Apple's in the guest room we had set up as a "cat" room. I really hated locking them in there this morning, knowing we'd be gone all day, but I'm going to go home at lunch and play with them. Tonight maybe we'll try to introduce them to each other, or else open up their doors and see what happens.

It's all so new! And so fun -- when a little creature comes to you and wants you to love it... gosh, is there anything sweeter?

A Beep in the Night

Monday morning at 2:37, Kate tapped me on the shoulder. She'd had a bad dream and needed to be "in the middle" of my bed, between me and her Daddy.

Bad dreams, I allow for a cuddle. Everyone needs a hug after a bad dream. So I let her in. Didn't take more than a few minutes before I was too hot and crowded, though, so I convinced her to come back to her room, and that I would stay in there with her. But I didn't sleep well in there, I'll admit. It wasn't even her fault -- my hands/wrists started throbbing and going numb (wreched carpal tunnel). 

I had just drifted off and was having a pretty weird dream, myself, when my 5:35 alarm started. Drat.

So I was sleepy yesterday morning, but got over it. Thank Coffee. Was greatly looking forward to a better night's rest last night.

2:30 am, though, guess what? Alex tapped me on the shoulder. "Creepy dream," he said, and also that he was hearing a weird dinging noise. I heard nothing, but into my bed he got. My 13-year-old almost-a-high-schooler. His puppy feet touching mine, my arm over his back. Bless it. Still needs that hug, like I said, and everyone gets one after bad dreams. He clenched the covers over his head, in his fists. 

Once again, I got hot and needed to go to the bathroom. In the bathroom, finally, I heard the dinging. More like a beep. I went to tell him I'd heard it, and then started wandering around the house to find the Beep. Downstairs, then back up again, not sure where it's coming from. By this time Shawn's awake, and with his help, we discovered the smoke alarm in the garage was the culprit: battery must be out. Why does this only happen in the dead of night?! (Also, why do they always come to Mommy's side of the bed first? Well, I know why... Mommy's a light sleeper and Daddy isn't. lol.) We'll fix the alarm today. And all the other smoke alarms will get new batteries, too. Alex went back to his room and we attempted to go back to sleep, but never really did. 5:35 came too soon again.

I promise I haven't been serving spicy food at dinner, or letting them watch horror movies or anything.

Watch, my body will wake itself up tonight at 2:30. I just bet.

I want a cat

First, I want to not be allergic to cats. I fear that might be a difficult thing to achieve; however, 17 years ago I relied on a daily Sudafed and managed being allergic to dogs JUST FINE. By the time Shawn and I bought our first house, I'm pretty sure I didn't need the Sudafed anymore, and lived with the dog easily for another 9 or 10 years after that.

Sorry for that preamble.

I've decided I want us to get a cat. ...I think. The kids would love to have a pet again, and I feel like we need to pull the trigger on that sooner rather than later, because they are growing fast and neither one will even live in the house with us (presumably) in 9 years or so! I want them to have that "pet" experience as kids.

We don't feel we can get another dog right now. We're just never home. These days, we leave the house at 7 am and don't get home until, on average, 6:45. This isn't fair to a dog who needs to play and be walked, and, oh yeah, go out to potty! But a cat... you know, they are trained to go potty in a handy box inside the house. It might not smell amazing, but I'm hopeful that kitty litter has come a long way in the 30 years since I've had a cat. Plus, a chore! For 2 kids to learn responsibility!

So, FYI, I've been snooping around on a local cat adoption website. It says that it would be even better to adopt two cats, so they'll have each other and not get bored. Heh. We are going to discuss this at dinner tonight.

Happy Birthday, Mom! ...and a Weekly Check-In

I love you!! Hope you celebrate with wine and something non-compliant and delicious!

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I think we're caught up after going out on the town Sunday night. ;) We saw The Church again. We met the band!! It was pretty awesome, walking into that room behind the stage to the VIP Meet and Greet, seeing them all sitting in there, waiting for us. Surreal. There were only about a dozen of us with passes. We got to know some other super-fans and even exchanged phone numbers (weird)! The whole thing was amazing... but it made us TIRED. Guess what? 43 and 48 are not so young anymore, haha! Sunday night didn't end until 2:00 am. Yes, we went to work the next day. Yes, at the normal time in the early morning. It's just what you have to do, you know? Or, it's what you have to do when you don't have an "unlimited" vacation-days policy, a la all the new Millennial-run companies. (SO UNFAIR.) We put ourselves to bed at 9:30 Monday night.

Anyway, we've been sleeping HARD since then and feeling pretty much back to normal, although I have been taking it suuuuuper easy on the dinner menu for the week. I feel kinda ashamed.

M - hot dogs with chili, and frozen tots. 3 hours sleep, don't bother me.

T - chili with rice, and rotel cheese dip with chips. so I cooked, and actually there were tomatoes in both the chili and the rotel, so there's vegetables. maybe I don't feel so bad after all.

W - tonight is Shawn's night to cook and I planned frozen Fish Sticks/Fish Tacos. I made some jalepeno tartar sauce this morning. What to go with it....? probably Kraft mac and cheese and maybe a little salad (you up for that, dear husband?)

TH - yeah, that's going to be a fast food night in between piano and choir.

F - I have some chicken breasts, and maybe I can pull something amazing out of my hat. Funnily, Friday has become a big cooking night this semester, since Thursdays are nuts and I can relax the schedule on Fridays. I kinda like the challenge of seeing what I have in the pantry. (Reminds me: I need to restock pantry staples garlic salt and PB/grape jelly. Not for dinner, just for stocking.)  

S - dropping Alex off at a co-ed party (still surprising: he's 13!) and going out to dinner without him. The mom who's hosting his party said adults can stay if they like, she'd have drinks and snacks for parents. But I asked Alex what he wanted me to do, and he said, "Hmmm. You can drop me off." Knowing that the host-mom is one of my best friends! Ha! Thanks a lot, kid! But I'll skip it for his sake.

Next week, I promise to cook some balanced meals. Hidden spinach, coming to a casserole near you.

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I've been reading non-fiction lately. Two memoirs. The first was The Glass Castle, which Mom pointed out in Barnes & Noble a few weeks ago, and reminded me there's a movie coming out. I really didn't know a thing about it, but wow, was it interesting. About a family with what I would call negligent, irresponsible parents, and how their kids survived their very odd, unmoored, poverty-stricken upbringing. It was an eye-opener, and I want Alex and Kate both to read it. I think it will make them much more appreciative of their nothing-short-of-amazing lifestyle. (In comparison, I mean.)

And next, I downloaded Wild from the e-library, by Cheryl Strayed. I love it. About her hike on the Pacific Coast Trail. Strangely, I've read a lot of hiking memoirs. Well, this is the third but it feels like a lot. Into Thin Air was the first, by Jon Krakauer, and then A Walk in the Woods by Bill Bryson. Loved them both. This one's the first I've read by a woman, and it's awesome as well. I do not understand why someone would do a months-long hike like that by him or herself. Ever. I cannot fathom. I've almost finished it, and now I want to re-read the other two. 

Reading, I think, is my preferred way to party on a Sunday night (even though our last Sunday really WAS epic, thank you, honey, for the tickets and for sharing your favorite music with me all these years). 

Doughnuts

There's no great way to get doughnuts before school. One of the privileges of being in 7th and 8th grade at our school is that, on Wednesday mornings after Mass, you get doughnuts. A different family is volun-told to bring them each week (ahead of time, thankfully). So tomorrow's our day.

• Option #1: I could get them tonight, but by 9:30 tomorrow morning they'll be dry and stuck to the bottom of the box.
• Option #2: I could offer to drive carpool tomorrow morning (Shawn usually does it, not me), and stop "on the way," in quote because there's no doughnut shop actually ON the way. The whole thing would probably ensure that we were one of the last cars in the carpool line and stress the kids out. I would also get to work late but I hardly care about that. 
• Option #3: I could ask Shawn to stop tomorrow morning on his way (also not really "ON" the way), which would stress him out more than it would me, and make him late to work. 

My gut says to go with Option #1, because 13-year-olds will likely eat doughnuts whether they're dry or sticky or not.

Service Hours

In middle school, our kids are required to turn in 3 hours of "service" each quarter. I use quotes because it's a little loose, what they define as service. For instance, you can run a 5K that's "for a cause," and that counts. If you are a member of the Safety Patrol one morning a week, that counts. And while I understand that those two services do some good for some people, I think they're pretty weak if you're actually trying to nurture a servant's heart in a kid.

Maybe I look down my nose at those options because when I was in high school, we had to do service, and Marybeth and I had a weekly appointment at a nursing home, where we helped with bingo, played the piano and sang hymns we didn't know, or just talked to the residents, and it was always awkward and a little uncomfortable. I think we did it for a semester. Come to think of it, I also did nursing home service when I was a pre-teen, at the request of my friend Nikki (or maybe her parents). One of the nursing home residents I met would sometimes call me up at home, to chat. Uncomfortable. I was 11, and she only barely knew me. She could kind-of ramble and I remember trying diligently to end the calls. I guess she needed someone, and now looking back, I hope I was at least a little bit of a comfort to her.

Anyway, since it's Alex's last year in Catholic school and he'll have to do even MORE service during his Confirmation year coming up, I have been thinking we need to progress beyond Safety Patrol. (I should say that he's also helped a couple of Eagle Scouts on their projects, but now he isn't in Scouts any more, so that's out.) There should probably be some kind of sacrificing involved, like a couple of hours on a weekend, don't you think? I'm not making him go to a nursing home, but I did sign us up, him and me, to work at the Parish Picnic this Saturday. They needed a lot of volunteers, so I picked the Putt Putt Challenge. Sounds pretty stress-free and hopefully we'll get the sense that we're serving the community in some way. (He has to turn in a form every quarter that asks, "How do you feel you benefited spiritually from this service?" That's hard to answer for school Safety Patrol, he's told me. Might be hard for putt-putt, too, but we'll see.)

I'd like to do something even more meaningful, like helping at the St. Vincent DePaul society store or a homeless ministry, but it takes a bit more effort to connect with those things. I'm going to try, though.

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Opposite of service: What I really want to do this weekend is N O T H I N G. Not that we've been doing a lot on the weekends, really, but Wednesday and Thursday nights, I've just come home exhausted. I guess having hurricane company drained me. And I think being bored at work doesn't help. Seriously, yesterday I had so few tasks and deadlines, I felt it physically (and mentally) by the end of the day. Restless, but seated at a desk. Anxious, but also unmotivated. You know when you lay around and do nothing all day but you feel extra tried by the end? It was like that. Awful. Today I made sure to have a couple of work tasks ready and waiting.

And then, I will look forward to:

• Cleaning my kitchen. Totally needs it after two weekends of company in a row.
• Going to the grocery store on a Friday night. No one will be there and it will be blissful!
• Switching my purse. Had to buy a new one yesterday at Target -- it had been SO long since I'd spent $100 at Target! (I also got new sponges, with which I'll clean the kitchen!)
• Decorating for fall? It could happen. 
• Having my morning coffee on the back patio, and needing a sweatshirt if it's chilly.
• Finishing my book (The Glass Castle - really good!)

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One other thing. I started daydreaming yesterday that I'd really love to rent a cabin in the mountains some fall weekend. Take an extra day off, even. I don't quite know why, except, well, I DO know that being outdoors makes me happy, and the woods seems to be my "happy place" more than the beach. Also, it's like being at home without having any chores that need doing. I wonder if we can make it happen this fall? Early Nov. or late Oct. maybe? I barely even care about seeing fall color -- I'd just like to have the getaway and the fresh air. Hmm.

Mid-Short-Week Check-In

Our Labor Day Weekend was just lovely. I'm so thankful Mom and Dad came to visit. It meant I didn't need to ask off work, or "work" from home on the kids' extra day off (Teacher In-Service). Although I hated being at the office that day, at least they all met me for lunch. And now I have more PTO days banked, to get me through the holiday season. That's always a good thing.

Anyway, we ate some yummy food (I'd say brunch on Sunday at Reveille was a highlight, as well as jambalaya on Tuesday), (well, and hamburgers on Sunday night in the backyard!), played a lot of cornhole and I have the mosquito bites to prove it, went to the bookstore allllll together once, and truly enjoyed the early mornings and fall temps on my back patio. Yay! So many of my favorite things! We even spent a couple of hours one morning watching 2 deer who were in the backyard woods. RIGHT. THERE. They stayed such a long time, even though we were moving around not-too-quietly. It was kinda magical.

Also, it's wonderful to have guests who don't feel like guests.

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Today is one of those marathon days that start up once school's in session. The kids have piano at 6:15, and I'll need Shawn to meet me there so I can get back to choir practice by 7:15. (I'm not really excited about it, as you know if you have read me for any length of time. I love singing, but I always complain about choir. Just... some of the people require too much effort. Sigh. Very Christian of me. But as long as the kids are in school at St. Joe's, I guess I'll keep up with it so we can get the "participating" Catholic tuition rate. Ha. The minute Kate graduates from 8th grade, I think I'm done.)

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And tomorrow, our annual (?) hurricane evacuees may arrive for an extended stay. We're.... of course happy to give them safe refuge. But kind-of less happy than we should be. They're guests that really feel like guests. Oh well. The kids'll have fun with their cousins.

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Update (Friday morning): Choir practice was really fun last night. Since it was the first one of the season, we started a whole pile of new music, and I realized: I really love sight-reading. Sight-singing. For years, it intimidated me (back in college, particularly). But I've gotten comfortable with it, confident, and I especially love when I get it right. Our director, Alvin, is a joy. He's so funny. I had to give him a hug afterwards, and then he amped it up even further by complimenting me. I left feeling really FILLED with happiness. (One of the big/contrary personalities wasn't there last night, which I know helped keep the atmosphere pleasant.)

Hair, Labor Day this weekend, baseball, and beer (in that order)

I have had to -- HAD TO, because I couldn't stand it any more -- pull my hair back at work, twice this week. Clean hair. Hair that I tried to "style," albeit hurriedly, before leaving the house, with a round brush, my blow dryer and hairspray. It's looking stringy and undone by 8:30 am, and just not working for me, so up it goes, in bobby pins or, today, a ponytail. Most of my adult life, my hair hasn't been long enough to do that, so it's a novelty for me to carry around ponytail holders, and to look so "casual" in my professional environment. I feel unprepared if I don't have a couple of ponytail holders in my purse. I'm glad it's getting cut and colored this weekend, because when I pull it back, much more grey is visible to the world.

I'm also doing Kate's hair all the time. She has asked me to braid it every day so far this school year. The good news is, usually there is plenty of time for me to do so. Last year, I never would have dreamed that possible, with our getting-dressed drama. (Man, I am grateful we got past that!) She likes me to do one small braid on each side, then join them in the back, very simply. Like this (this is not Kate's head, btw, just a Google image):

Or one small braid on one side, incorporated into a high ponytail. It's been so cute, and so fun. No frilly bows or barrettes, but still. She wants to learn to do it herself, but I'm holding on to this time when she needs me to do it for her. I know it won't last long. She talks about letting her bangs grow out -- kind-of her signature look, since her very first haircut -- and I think it will look great on her but I also dread it a little bit, because I know she'll look so grown up. 

I should also report that Alex has been styling his hair now for a few years, and looks SO GROWN UP. Why is this happening?!?

(And then, if I've reported on everyone else, I might as well say that Shawn's hair is still very much NOT greying, lucky him. Don't touch his hair.)

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Mom and Dad are on the road right now, driving to see us. I love that Mom asked if they could come visit. YES YES YES, anytime! Plus, it's going to help me out because the kiddos have an extra day and half off over Labor Day. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! So tonight, I'm looking forward to Happy Hour at 5:30 and a snacky dinner, somehow fitting in the kids' piano lessons and getting them to bed on-time, and then we will have to figure out something fun we can do while they're here. 

Not that they require entertaining, of course. But I have a day off, too! Would be nice to do something FUN, as Kate always implores us. I'm thinking of apple picking. We've never done that and there are lots of orchards nearby.

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We DID something fun last weekend: Went to a Braves game at their new stadium! Met a former player, even: the famous Mr. Jeff Francoeur, whose sister I worked with during his rookie season. That was awesome. Ate our dinner at the new Wahlburgers, yum yum! And the weather was decent -- not too terribly hot, like most Atlanta baseball games are. We had amazing seats right behind the home dugout, and the kids enjoyed themselves. Us parents, too. Drank a beer! (Kate said to me in disbelief, "Women can have beer?" HA! She'd never seen me drink it, I guess.) In fact, it was the first game we've attended since having kids, I think, that we were able to stay all the way until the last out at 10:30pm! So that was momentous. 

Something for the "menus" category

Just because. I think it's a decent lineup this week.

Sunday: We had this Chicken Pot Pie. I had baked 6 chicken thighs one night last week, but as it turned out, no one was hungry. And I always have Bisquick and frozen peas and carrots on-hand. I also added a little corn and some leftover chopped broccoli. Cleaned out the fridge for the win! It was yummy with a Caesar salad.

Monday: Patty Melts and Roasted New Potatoes. My family was like, "Where's the Bread??" But guess what, family: We should all eat less of it. I can see I'm starting to rely on those roasted potatoes as a side item. Everyone will be sick of them if I don't back off a little, lol.

Tuesday: Grilled Cheese and Soup. (What was that she said about bread? Whoops.) We have a little gumbo leftover, I have chicken noodle available, and tortilla soup mix, and we have activities/meetings tonight so it's gotta be a quick one.

Wednesday: Chicken Parmesan with egg noodles. It's super easy, but doesn't seem like it. I think I'll make some sauteed zucchini to go with it. These kids need to eat more vegetables, seriously. (I'm always of the opinion that kids as skinny as Alex should just EAT and it doesn't really matter what, but sometimes I do feel vegetable guilt.)

Thursday: Welcome to Moe's! This year it's piano on Thursday nights at 6:15, and we got really hungry before the lessons ended the one time we didn't eat first. So now I know to stop somewhere on the way.

Friday: Make your own Pizza night. Tomato sauce is a vegetable. ;)

Last week stuff, this week stuff

Last week's meetings started well, got fairly intense and exhausting (Tuesday night I had a mini breakdown - just a few stress-related tears is all - followed by a much-needed workout and hard sleep... I think it was those meetings combined with the 2nd week of school), ended with a flurry of work-related activity, and were tempered by the nice feeling of friendship among the three of us coworkers. At least there was/is that. The dinner party at my house felt like a highlight, including my family being so sweet and making me so proud. I want to remember Alex hugging me when he could see I was slightly panicked about getting things ready before the guests arrived... and then offering to clear the table after we ate.

And now that big week is over, and it's Monday again, and I suppose I have to get back to actual work. :/  No one wants that!

It's also Eclipse Day, August 21, 2017, and we're doing exactly nothing to celebrate at home. Of course, the thing takes place in the middle of the day, making it difficult. I just saw a slew of Facebook posts and learned that many families in my circle are traveling an hour or 2 north so they can see the Totality (we're only in the path of Partial Eclispe), taking their kids out of school and everything. So naturally I feel guilty now, that we're not doing that. The school ordered eclipse glasses for every student and they're doing some special science activities when it happens, though, so all is not lost. I vaguely remember being on my school playground, looking through an index card with a hole in it, when I was really young; evidently there was a solar eclipse in February, 1979, but the timing isn't right for me to have been on the St. Anthony's playground in that month/year, so maybe I'm confused. But anyway, I hope my kids will have happy memories of an Epic Natural Event. http://mashable.com/2017/08/18/1979-total-solar-eclipse-footage/#LjMcIbOaXaqR

(The guy on that 1979 video mentions the date August 21, 2017, "38 years from now," and says something like, "we pray that eclipse will appear over a world at peace." Hrm. We needed that prayer more than he knew.)

In a few minutes, Shawn and I are meeting up at a law office to finally sign our first Last Will and Testament. Yikes. Seems auspicious on a day when our sun will be darkened in the middle of the day LOL! We've known we should have one, and hopefully within an hour, that task will be checked off our list. (Until the kids get to be adults and we have to change it.)

Then we'll continue with our busy lives, just trying to enjoy each day as much as I enjoyed the chicken pot pie casserole I made for dinner last night. :)

Deep Thinking about Content Marketing

I'm not going to share my actual Content Marketing thoughts with you, I don't think (we'll see where this goes), but just report to you: that's what I've been doing this week. Thinking and Studying. Deeply.

For background: In Germany last summer, our goal was to put a Content Marketing Strategy into place. Content Marketing is supposed to be different from Product Marketing, in that you're supposed to create content that's of interest to your audience. (This is why you ladies see one million recipe videos in your FB feed.) You're NOT supposed to talk about your products or be sales-y. Instead, you're supposed to know your audience/consumer, and know what might make her want to click on your link. Such as, my consumer is a 54-year-old woman who was diagnosed with breast cancer 6 years ago, so at this point she's maybe looking for information about how to eat better and get her exercise; or maybe she's going on a cruise this year and wants to know what to pack. She's not necessarily looking for information about the keyword "mastectomy." (She's past that.) I have been trying to convince my teammates about this, but it's a fine line. We do also have evidence/data (I guess? I don't really get into the "data" part of things) saying that many, many women, newly diagnosed, type the word "mastectomy" into their Google search box. And we'd like them to find us, too. So there are intricacies and details. Our company adds to the challenge by being global and extra-complicated. Medical, but also fashion-minded. Ill-equipped to do many of the technical things everyone else can do. Etc.

Anyway, it's been a year since that trip, and next week our Content team is gathering here in Kennesaw to review the Content Marketing we did, figure out what worked and what didn't, and figure out what we need to do in the next year. It's tough because according to the experts, a strategy like this has a loooooong lead-time. Content Marketing doesn't lead to instant results.

I've been reading a LOT of articles by Content Marketing experts lately... and there seem to be a LOT of experts. It's kind-of exhausting. And like anything else on the Internet, you can find an article to support every tactic, every opinion, every opposite and equally significant idea. But maybe this is what I'm here for. I joke, over to the right in my "about" paragraph, that my superpower is deep thinking. But that might be the closest thing to true that I know about myself. So perhaps I'm meant to do this very thing. I'm not miserable doing it, I noticed earlier in the week, when I was buried in the weeds of SO MANY interesting and useful instructions on ContentMarketingInstitute.com. I enjoy learning. But it does make for long days and a very tired brain by Friday.

I think our meetings next week will be fine. I don't have to "present" anything, so all of this prep is just me trying to be knowledgeable. None of the attendees is a problem-maker (not like last year). We're all willing to listen to each other, and really HEAR each other, and we're friends. None of us has a personal agenda. More than anything we all just want to be respected for our collective work. We hope it's successful in some way. I hope I'll be open to ideas. I have many of my own -- complaints, as usual, and things I know aren't working (for me) in the day-to-day. But I hope I'll be able to also see what IS working -- because I think some of it IS. We're probably doing much better work than we (I) think.