In which time flies

Dude, is it already July 31?? I can't believe that. I can't. Where is my calendar, that cannot be right.

I'm in denial because of this pending trip to NH. BY MYSELF. You'd think I could be a little more excited -- typically I'd looooong for a 2-hour plane ride where I can read, uninterrupted. And a few days along the lakeshore with my best friends from college? Possibly holding a cold Corona? That can't be all bad. But I... I just really really wish DH could come with me. He and I went out this weekend with another couple, and while it was fun -- ask me to tell you about the spitballs -- it just made me crave more time together.

I was reminded how well he and I go together when, Sunday morning during Coffee Time, AJ decided to grab my cup and start shaking it, to prove his counterpoint that coffee IS for little boys, stoopidMommy, and now you have it all down your brand new shirt, so there. What could I do? I was still holding the now-dripping cup in my swatting hand (yes, I would have swatted his butt once for that infraction), so I set him down, said my stern "When Mommy says, NO, it means NO," and before I could stomp off to rinse the shirt, DH immediately swooped in. The wailing commenced, but so did the Speaking Firmly and Quietly and the Time Out. It was in rhythm. I did the right thing, DH did the right next thing. It worked out. Peas and carrots.

Barring his joining me, since he will go to Grandad's instead, I'd really rather be home with AJ and my parents. Of course I want them to experience their toddler grandson in all his cuteness. :) They deserve special one-on-two time with him. Hopefully he won't... well, I was going to type a lot of things that I hope he won't do, but I know he will, so why bother. He's two. Nothing a popsicle can't cure, and they're allowed.

In a week, I guess I'll be wishing this mini vacation hadn't gone so fast. In the meantime, I will miss everyone quite a lot, I'm afraid.


PS - Spitballs! Were spit at us in a bowling alley! DH instructed me to stealthily investigate Where they came from, and after I told him, he walked straight up to two messy-hair-teen-boys and looked them in the EYES and told them to cut it out or he'd inform the management. They were all, "Whu? Huh. We're not doing anything." BUT I WATCHED THEM DO IT. And it reminded me of a few choice young men in my high school who would have been THOSE GUYS. Laugh!! DH didn't want to do anything more than tell 'em to quit, since a Rise out of us was what they wanted... but it was the highlight of the evening. Oooh, spitballs in the bowling alley! So clever! To be young with nothing better to do. Hah!

How I can relate to NASCAR

Never thought I'd write that sentence. Heh. The first time I introduced my then-boyfriend now-husband to the fam was in Indianapolis, and we went to the Indy 500 museum, where he explained the finer points of auto racing.

We knew nothing of racing, until that moment in time. We learned that Indy is not NASCAR. Ah, yes, the picture is clear now, we thought: Indy has Danica Patrick, and nicely laid bricks on the track, and the whole thing appears rather historical and... high-minded in comparison. HOWEVER...! DH grew up watching NASCAR; then he learned the inner workings from an internship in PR (PR! Business! Not dirty!) at the Charlotte Motor Speedway. So I've developed at least a spouse's appreciation for all those endearing beer guts ahem, race day. :)

But today I discovered, in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, that little miss piano-lessons, debutante, thought-I-was-too-good-for-NASCAR can no longer keep such a distance from it! I'll paraphrase:

"The fastest crash course in how to be a Modern Southerner (in Atlanta) is to attend a NASCAR race.... the sport itself is really just bad driving and tailgating and cussing at one another at excessive speed, which most of us know how to do from commuting on Ga. 400" (or any of the God-forsaken, asphalt-spitting metro area highways).

Ba-haaaa! I've lived here ten-plus years, people. Atlantans are all NASCAR, at our core. Cussing and tailgating.

Maybe I should get a "3" for my bumper.

My Gift to You

I haven't had anything to say for 2 days. I don't want to bore everyone. As my Archives column gets longer and longer, I've been feeling like my blogging is the epitome of a self-centered pursuit. I mean, I've tied up little treasures of AJ's babyhood with a nice ribbon, here, and someday I will really enjoy reminiscing over this time in our lives. But the stretch of that list just seems egotistical, when I haven't really contributed to the greater good -- or even the tomes of good writing -- y'know? I went to lunch by myself yesterday, and as I was driving there, thought, "Well, it's good to have some time alone to think..." But then I stopped myself and admonished: "Wha-? You 'think' all the time! You LIVE inside your head! And publish it to the Internet, for some reason!" So that's where I'm at. (<-- Look! I just used one of my grammatical pet-peeves! I hate that sentence!) Trivial "Wonh-wonh-wonh-wah-wah" sometimes shouldn't be shared, just for the sake of a daily update. You're quite welcome.

Grandad's still in ICU, but he's doing better, we think. Husband feels he needs to go up there. And conveniently, we both have next TH and FR off work. Unfortunately, we had already bought plane tickets for a trip to New Hampshire, concocted by my college roommate -- a "mini reunion" of our little group of friends. We're thinking I'll just go by myself now. It'd have been fun to hold hands with my Hubby while walking down streets I've never seen, but oh well. Family comes first, and I know Nanny will appreciate having him to help her. Either way, AJ gets a break from both of us, so he probably wins the most. :)

Here's what I'm going to do, so I feel that I've Given Something Back today. I'm sharing a recipe. WAIT! An Idea! How about: Easy, Breezy Recipe Thursday, or something? All the cool kids are using clever "Pick-a-day" titles now. Anyway, here. You'll love this dessert!

Gina's Pretzel Pie

2 cups crushed stick pretzels
1.5 sticks melted butter or margarine
3 tablespoons sugar

Mix above ingredients together and press into a 9x13 pan or Pyrex dish. Bake 8-10 minutes at 300 degrees F.

Beat 8 oz. cream cheese, 10 oz. Cool Whip, and 1 cup sugar. Pour over cooled crust.

Top w/ fresh fruit or pie filling of your choice. (We like strawberries.)

Now, if you want to give me an easy recipe, I'm all ears. Dessert's the topic since I'm feeling my sweettooth. But after that, on with your day! Nothing to see here!

Items 1, 2, and 3

Bullet-point post!

• Home decor's on my mind. I'm supposed to call it "homecaring," to render it less daunting and more like an Act of Love, says [my self-appointed therapist] Sarah B. Breathnach. Some are genius at it; my friend Pam adds all the right personal touches, and rearranges every few months so her house always looks fresh to my eyes. I wish I could do that. Saturday I tried moving my stuff around -- replacing old pictures, putting things away that had been sitting in the same spot for years -- and things do look slightly renewed.... but I'm not completely at ease just yet. I think it's funny when your inner Creative gets shaken up, somehow, and things look different to you. I mean, Friday I looked at my mantle and thought nothing. Saturday? It made me MAD that it was so boring and stupid. Ha! Also: Feng Shui says if you move 27 things, your fortunes will change. I counted, and that's about how many I moved, so Vegas, here we come!
• AJ has a new friend. There once was a giant yellow Care Bear. A "cuddle pillow," specifically. We received it at one of the baby showers, and until recently, it was contained in its plastic bag, buried in AJ's closet under all kinds of hand-me-down clothes I hadn't sorted yet. I hated that thing, frankly. But we're in the season of Organize at our house -- possibly spurring the decor thing -- so I broke down and unwrapped it.... aaaaand he LOVES it. He slept OVER it last night, his head and feet about 3 inches lower than his middle, because it's so dang big. I'm glad on the one hand -- his pacifier is going to go away forever here, soon, and it's good to have a replacement soothie. But Funshine Bear is not going to be so easy to take, say, on a plane or into the grocery store. Yikes.
• Charlotte's Web (the TV movie) is still as sweet and good as it was in 1973 -- gasp! I know right?! That is OLD. And so are we! -- and now Debbie Reynolds sings to me, every day, "Chin UP!" It's good advice and I appreciate her for it. It's also AJ's favorite part of the movie. He marches around and sings "Tee! Up!" at random moments throughout the day. I mean, could he BE any cuter??

Waiting on client.

We sometimes use "WOC" to mean "waiting on client" or, "thank-god-I-am-not-responsible-if-this-project-is-late," in our office project log. I feel like that's much too frivolous a title for the news that DH and I are just waiting 'til the next phone call from his Mom, to find out how Grandad is doing. It was "pretty good," until later last night, when it was "not so good." And we haven't heard anything since, which is good, because every time the phone rings I hesitate.

I am, also and actually, WOC today, so I had time to do this stupid meme, another very idle occupation in the face of such life-and-death --- oh hell, there's my phone again -- (whew, just DH at the store wondering if I need anything) -- matters.

So, my apologies. But to take my mind off it:

The High School meme

1. Who was/were your best friend(s)?
You know her as "larry." Still is my BF! I'm lucky because she married my cousin so now we're Family!

2. What sports did you play?
Cheerleading is a sport. (larry and) I played it for 3 out of 4 years.

3. What kind of car did you drive?
1990 silver Ford Tempo with RED INTERIOR, we mustn't forget!

4. It's Friday night- where were you?
At the football game in the fall, or at a community theater rehearsal if winter/spring.

5. Were you a party animal?
No. I never got invited to the parties. I didn't much care, either. (Sometimes I cared.)

6. Were you a considered a flirt?
Not really, I don't guess, but there was one guy I was openly flirty with in 10th grade World History. And what a debacle that turned out to be. Heh.

7. Ever skip school?
I don't think I did. Unless it was an educational activity like Math Team or the county vocal competition or something.

8. Were you a nerd?
Assuredly.

10. Did you get suspended/expelled?
Heavens, no.

11. Can you sing the fight song?
Pretty sure we didn't have one. Lame!

12. Who was your favorite teacher?
Ms. Jernigan, my 9th grade French teacher

13. Favorite class?
Junior and Senior English tie for favorite, academically. I liked Trig, too. TYPING was fun, senior year, because larry and I both had little crushes on boys in that class (I think? was K in there, too?) and the teacher let us goof off quite a bit.

14. What was your school's full name?
Pensacola Catholic High School

15. School mascot?
Crusader

16. Did you go to Prom?
Junior and Senior years.

17. If you could go back and do it over, would you?
Not a chance.

18. What do you remember most about graduation?
The ceremony itself? I remember walking into the gymnasium where it was held. (I know, isn't that sentimental?) Surprisingly, I barely remember giving my speech.

19. Favorite memory of your Senior Year?
It's a toss-up between Prom and our class trip to DisneyWorld.

20. Were you ever posted up on the senior wall?
I don't know what that means.

21. Did you have a job your senior year?
Nope. I was footloose and fancy-free.

23. Where did you go most often for lunch?
The "senior lunchroom." Heh. Soooo not a perk. But we thought it was.

24. Have you gained weight since then?
Yeah, about 12 pounds I guess. And thanks for bringing THAT up.

25. What did you do after graduation?
My mom & dad had a party at our house, with just our relatives and larry's family, and then larry and I went to the all-night school-sponsored party, called "Grad Night," I believe. It was held at one of the military bases' Rec Centers, so there was a pool and bowling and video games and they even hired a hypnotist, oooooh!

26. When did you graduate?
1992

27. Where are most of your classmates?
I suspect most are still in the P'cola area, but I know of several who've moved away.

28. Ten year reunion, you going?
Already did. It was pretty fun. Everyone looked fantastic, at least. And most of the guys were nice; the girls? Meh. There were still a few bitches. But I got a good buzz so what do I care. ;)

29. Who was your home room teacher?
Well it changed every year… my last one was Mrs. Soule, the cool senior religion teacher.

30. Who will repost this after you?
I doubt anyone cares as much as I do! Larry may be unable to resist, now that I've jogged her memory. (Answer in comments or in your own blog if you want!)

*Blushing*

Ohmygoodness, I am a B4B Finalist! :) Wheeee!

And Melessa, too! Congratulations, Melessa!

Ends with run-on sentences

So, I was talking with my best friend the other day on the phone, and what should come up in our innocuous conversation but -- I don't know what we were originally talking about... recipes? shoes? the dollar spot at Target? but all of a sudden WHAMMO! -- topic = Baby Number Two.

Y'see, she had spoken to my Darling Husband during Beach Week, who tipped her off that after AJ turned two, the T-family goalie would be pulled, as Metrodad says, and there would be much rejoicing. :) And this is what DH and I have discussed, of course. But actually sharing that with people and making it real? Color me a teensy bit unsure.

A), -- well, first there's A, The Obvious: How in God's name will I handle TWO little people at the same time???! -- but that's been covered in so many blogs I don't need to reiterate the Fear here. Breastfeeding AND potty-training AND no sleep, oh my.

My real A), is: I don't know why I do this but I think of getting pregnant in terms of my job, and my coworkers. We've had a bit of turnover in the last week-ish, and so making any announcements sorta shakes everyone up. More important, I suspect that a certain coworker who deserves it very much, is also wishing on making a baby at this time. This someone, very dear to me, is also in my department, so to have us both with maternity leave at roughtly the same time, if it worked out that way, might be difficult for the company. WHY DO I CARE about the company, you ask? Heck, I don't know. I suppose the government dictates that they would just have to FIGURE IT OUT, because they can't fault us ladies for gettin' knocked up, no matter when nor where nor how many. But it's a small company, I can't help but think of it as a little family, and you know -- you have to consider the good of the whole, when it's a family. (Note: In the grand picture of the world, I know this is no real reason to NOT have baby #2 whenever the heck we want... It just crosses my mind is all.)

B), I would NEVER want to steal this dear coworker's thunder, which I hope she knows. I heart her very much and if this happens for her and her hubby, I would be the MOST excited for her. (Although it might be fun to share the experience, too. ICE CREAM IN THE COMPANY FRIDGE, is all I'm sayin'.)

But C), I desperately want AJ to have a sibling he's close to. I know from my own experience that IT IS AWESOME. :) I can't imagine life without my sister, and gosh, it'd be neat for AJ to have a playmate RIGHT IN HIS OWN HOUSE. They say that you space them 2 years apart if you want them to be friends, or 4 years for economics. But in two more years? I might be ready to be all done with diapers. It seems like a long time to wait, and besides, they wouldn't even be in high school together, ever. And that'd be a bummer, I think. Because nothing says "I love you, little brother," like ignoring him in the cafeteria or at the football game.

Finally D), It would probably be quite good for ME, personally, to have a baby -- despite getting FAT again and lordy I fear trying to lose the baby weight after #2, because I've heard it's HARD, and I remember my aforementioned best friend working out like CRAZY after her 2nd was born, and I'm also NOT as fit now as I was in 2003 when I got pregnant the first time -- but it would STILL be GOOD for me because if there is ONE THING I love to do, it is to smother AJ with kisses. And I have a feeling that he is going to wash his hands of ALL that nonsense as he gets older and realizes people are LOOKING AT HIM. So another baby would be a good thing to have because, my word! The overflow of LOVE has got to be poured out on SOMEONE. :)

Gratitude journal

• I'm so grateful for my iPod! When all else fails -- or when all else is good! Either way! -- the following tunes put me in quite a good mood: "It's Your Thing, by the Isley Brothers, "You Get What You Give," by the New Radicals, "Something More," by Sugarland, and "Here I Am," by Andrew Hyra. Mmm, that's-a-good-a music.
• Volumizing Shampoo. Because VOLUMIZING Shampoo is really the way to go. My hair has bounce! It holds its style! It's Hawwwwwwt! with the Volumizing. So I think I made a big mistake at BJs, buying Pantene Moisturizing Shampoo for "dry & damaged" hair -- a colossal-sized bottle for only $6.99. I think the Moisturizing totally weighs stick-straight locks like mine down. If anyone wants a bottle of shampoo, I am giving one away.
• Sleeeeeeeeep. I am grateful for sleep. In fact, so grateful that I would like some more, please.
• My husband's Grandad is having surgery today to remove a malignant tumor in his intestines. He's 80. It's scary, because his lungs are not strong enough to support this surgery -- they're putting him on a ventilator. I'm so grateful that I know him, and that he's being brave and fighting cancer, when he could have chosen to just sit and wait. And I'm grateful for his doctors who, I trust, will take care of his fragile body. My thoughts are all in Tennessee today. I'm grateful for Tennessee.

Shopping with el-e-e

Disclaimer: There is nothing really that interesting about this post. Just your general blah, talking to myself.

I've decided I'm done with BJs Wholesale Club. I was wary before joining last year, and yesterday's trip just made me mad. I wanted Fruit Loops; they had a 3-pack with FLs, Apple Jacks, and Corn Pops. I wanted toilet paper; they carry every brand except the kind with aloe, which my darling husband would be thrilled to know I've told you he prefers. I wanted frozen chicken breasts; they carry a 4.5-pound bag or a ten-pounder, neither of which I can accommodate in my side-by-side. They've got Coke, but not caffeine-free. They've got Altoids, but not cinnamon. ARRRRRRGH. At every turn I was just ticked the hell off.

So I'm all done with you, sucky BJs. Maybe, maybe I'll consider Sam's or Costco, because perhaps their selection will be better. But until I have a family of fourteen (not! very! likely!) I don't need ya. Or your aloe-less TP, either, so there!

In my other attempt to break the bank -- oh, did I not say that? I spent $105 even as I was hating the store! Ya gotta have your diapers and your 1,000-feet of alumimun foil! -- I also went to Talbots yesterday. And they're having their semi-annual sale, [larry!] so you better go check it out. I found some good deals, and that made me happy.

Happy is a good thing. I was thinking, the other day, about how much I actually, genuinely smile in a typical day. Not enough, that is for certain. Oh, yes, I smile at AJ -- plenty of happy in that department -- but otherwise? Um... not really. I used to be labeled "Bubbly," but THAT seems so far from the truth lately that it's really hilarious in itself. Except... not laughing. I just read about laughter yoga and I'm pretty intrigued. Evidently, you can cause all kinds of health and inner harmony by getting together with a bunch of strangers, walking around in a circle, and repeating,

"I don't know why I'm laughing. Ha. Ha. Ha. I don't know why I'm laughing."

I tried this yesterday in the car (not the walking around in a circle part), after my annoying Wholesale Club experience. I did the exercise By Myself, which just shows you how intent I am on Bringing the Joy! And I did end up actually laughing, but mostly because it felt so ridiculous and pathetic. Maybe that's entirely the point. There's a laughter-yoga group in my area... Might be kinda cool, you know? It'd be like Tai Chi, only funnier. :) Anyone want to join me?

Bubbly. Heh.

Call me FlyLady

Some things I accomplished yesterday:

• Wielded Mop and bleach against the laundry room floor. Badly needed doing. I am all about bleaching these days.
• Cleaned all three toilets, wa-hoo.
• Washed a load of towels.
• Emptied the dishwasher, my least favorite of all chores.

And that is it. I didn't vacuum, I didn't dust. The house isn't entirely cleaned up. My theory? What reason have we to LIVE, if EVERYTHING is already done? This explains a lot about me as a person! Some people do a project start-to-finish. But me, I'm ok if the last bit remains undone, at least if there's no deadline. Lazy much? :) Laundry's the perfect example. I'm okay with washing, drying, and folding. I mean, if it's not folded then it's getting all wrinkly and unwearable and everyone knows that's no good. BUT! When it's eleven-thirty o'clock p.m., and it hurts just to BE awake, putting all the folded t-shirts and socks away goes to the bottom of my priority list. My chair is sitting there for a reason, and no one's going to sit in it overnight, so the socks will be just fine there. They can wait until tomorrow. Drives my husband out of his head.

Edited to add:
In other cleaning news, I've finally surrendered to the inevitable... I am now using something similar to this for toy storage In Our Living Area. Ugh! Ugh! and Ugh. SO not pretty. But SO the only way to successfully manage HotWheels and Legos. I was hoping to avoid plastic-meets-pier-one, as a signature "look." But there it is.

Between feet

This is my Blogging 4 Books entry.

It's hot and steamy out, 5:00 pm, July, Georgia... NOT, I can assure you, my favorite time to be out of doors, especially when there's cold tea in the fridge and conditioned air to be savored. Wouldn't you know, that's exactly the time yesterday that Napoleon, our dear almost-ten-year-old lab/chow, starts jumping out of his skin, desperate to potty. Again. (It is going to take some getting used to, this "older dog" thing. Nap's had a bladder of steel his whole life, being raised from birth as an apartment dog. But no longer. Have yard, will pee.)

When Nap starts hopping one foot to the other, AJ joins the club immediately. He KNOWS it means he's going to get to play "ow-hide." With two of 'em whining, what can I do? I sigh, grab the Off wipes to towel us down, and step out holding my breath, facing the humidity.

It actually isn't so bad. We have pretty large trees all over our property, so there's at least a bit of shade. And since the birthday, we've got all kinds of new toys to occupy the 15 or 20 minutes that AJ's attention will likely last. The orange bubble gun is his first favorite: Kajillions of grape-scented (yes.) bubbles with just one pull on the trigger! And I get to be proud of his developing manual dexterity -- a "handy" skill for bubbles, har har. He chases 'em down, wanting to blow them this way and that way, and we drain the soap tray twice, then he quickly gets on his new toddler-trike and I push him around the driveway. It's like he's in a race to accomplish as many toys as he can before dinnertime. Next up, the soccer ball.

We're not really a soccer family. Neither DH nor I ever played it, never have watched it much (maybe one high school game when I thought I was crushing on the class soccer guy), and we don't even know anyone who plays regularly. Of course, we both grew up before soccer-moms were soccer-moms, before every mini-van in town had That Sticker on the bumper, before the World Cup was cool. But AJ, he's a little boy, and little boys need! things! to kick and throw, and so that is what he begins to do outside in the evening heat. And then Daddy arrives home. And then interestingly, everything somehow slows down a little bit and the light seems softer.

"Heeyyyy, AJ," DH says in his gentle Savannah accent. "How was your day, Buddy?"

(AJ's very busy placing the ball in an azalea bush, then knocking it down.)

"Kick it to me," Daddy suggests.

And AJ does. He sets the ball down in front of him and taps it with his little foot. Daddy taps it over to me. I steer it gently with a graceful kick try not to trip over it and manage to bare-foot it back in AJ's general direction.

"Now AJ toon," he says to no one in particular. He toddles over, stops, studies the ball, and kicks it again, right to his Daddy. And so our little triangle continues -- DH and me chatting, grinning, AJ trying new moves here and there, and giggling when he has a big success -- for a good long while, until finally I remember that the spaghetti sauce inside needs stirring. I leave the boys to their moment.

They don't come in until later, both a little sweaty and pink-cheeked. I just smile, hoping that in their lifetimes, they'll share a lot like this, between their feet.

The time of his life

Dear AJ,
I have never been more thrilled than I was to watch you turn two this weekend. You are my big boy now! Your smiles -- both spontaneous and "pasted-on," which you now can do on command -- are bigger than the biggest sun, and full of so much life (and teeth!). When your grandparents arrived on Friday and you made laps around the house, giddy with the excitement of your impending party, it made me feel like a kid, myself! I wanted to squeal with delight that you were so delighted. You knew that all the attention was meant for you, and I wanted you to just revel in that, even letting you stay up WAY past bedtime because you were having so much fun. It's fun for me to witness that -- I don't think I've ever seen you happier. This weekend you built race-tracks out of wooden blocks with your Daddy, and I know that meant so much to him. I can't believe you played that game for 30 full minutes! You rode your trike ("bike") and let "ebber-body" push you up and down the driveway, telling us to go "Dat way." You ate cake, with a fork, at a table -- a bit different from last year's headfirst dive into blue frosting! And you blew the candle out. (It was fun practicing that.) You DANCED! Something you've not cared one whit about before. You played with your friends, and even though you made that pleading, "Nooo, that's MY toy," face a few times, Mommy knew it was all a big act, and in the end you shared. You behaved when we went out to a fancy dinner, AND... as if a switch has been magically flipped, you, at two, are EATING! I can't tell you how much THAT pleases me. I'm not sure why you didn't sleep well -- why you're going through this little stage where you call out and cry for me multiple times in the night -- but I hope it's just because you've been so wound up for four days, and we'll get past it. This weekend, you constantly asked, "Where my pah-ty?" and "Where my boh-day?" -- hands up, questioning -- and melted my heart a thousand times.

I am so glad you had fun, Sweet Boy. I am so, so proud of you!

There's a trike in my trunk

It's going to be an awesome weekend. Happy "Boh-day," AJ! I will post photos of the guest of honor next week.

Gadgets

I like that on work from home days I can use some of the gadgets we received as wedding presents lo these many 5 years ago -- things that normally would sit quietly in a cabinet collecting dust for the next 20 years or so. On weekends with the busy schedules (and strong desire to eat out!), I never think to use them, but when I'm sitting here working (blogging), I figure I might as well multitask. Usually, it's the crock pot. I'm still learning -- we've had moderate success with c-p recipes. Today, however, it's the bread machine. If all goes well, I should have steamy, delicious French bread ready by noon. Mmmm.

The "small" birthday party I was planning for AJ is growing. I guess I didn't really think to count all the parents of his little friends. Heh, whoops. :) Good thing my mom and mom-in-law will also be around to help. It's just cake and ice cream, right? This morning I asked AJ how old he was going to be on his birthday. I had to prompt him with "Two?" And he replied, "Ayyyyy, five." Which means, "And, five." :) Let's hope not! Two is approaching so fast already!!

Hey, how about an update a la Melessa:

Reading:
I finished Jodi Piccoult's Plain Truth during our vacation. I loved it. She is a great writer -- anyone agree? She may be turning into one of my favorites. I think I want to read a third of her books, which really says something. I'm not typically a multiple-books-by-one-author kind of girl. I guess I feel like it's a waste of time? But Piccoult really tells a good story. This one, of course, intrigued the heck out of me with the Amish characters. Since I was pretty young, I've been fascinated by them, the Shakers -- all those guys. Plus! It was a sort-of murder mystery, and for the first time in maybe my whole life, I had the culprit figured out WAY before it was revealed. I am so smrt. :)

I'm also trying to read Daniel Pink's A Whole New Mind, which is something I never would have picked up had it not been recommended to me. It's pretty good, though -- all about how the [business] world is now driven more by the right side of the brain, the creative side, than the left. It's very true; design and aesthetic is more important than ever in this era of abundance, as he calls it. I'm learning a lot. Funny thing, though -- he recommends "Real Simple" magazine as a great example of a design mag we all should read. I picked one up yesterday and once again, I didn't think it was all that fantastic. Designed beautifully, yes. It's a pretty magazine. But the articles have never once blown me away. Nor the recipes. I keep trying to love it, but I just don't. Maybe I'm missing something?

Watching:
Once again, last night we watched Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares on BBC America. That show is eff-ing hilarious. And I only say "eff-ing" because HE swears every other word with his very British accent and slang, and half the time we don't know which are the swear words! We love it. We laugh out loud. The show is really a documentary as he goes into flailing restaurants and tells the owners and chefs what they're doing wrong. There's almost always a big blow-out fight between Ramsay and the head chef, and it's just cool to watch the inner workings of a restaurant business. If you have BBC America, totally check it out.

Question for my friends with UK spouses! Do you love BBC America? Is it, for your spouse, a little taste of home? Or an annoying plot to Americanize everything we Americans can get our hands on? Just wondering.

Concentrate.

I think there should be rules governing the placement of a national holiday in the middle of the week. As in, they should not do that to us! It just skews everything right out of focus and makes you think "Hey hey, it's the weekend!" when in fact it is definitely NOT the weekend. I am having trouble regaining my bearings today. How about you?

It's partly because of being off yesterday, and doing nothing but laying on my couch, then finding a different position in which to lay on the couch, and racing cars with AJ on the floor. But mostly because today is Buy Presents for AJ's Birthday Day, and I am excited. We took him to Mecca Target yesterday, to see what vibes we would get when we drove by certain items. We got this vibe when we drove by the "Cars"-the-movie end-cap display: "Lellow Cawww! Lello Cawww! Lellllllloooooo Cawwwww! (sob, sob, whine whine, sob)."

So I think he wants one of those.

We also got a good feeling about a bubble machine, and lots of Spiderman things caught his attention, and Bob the Builder, and some Hot Wheels cars, and he actually ASKED for Wolverine, which made his daddy VERY happy. Even if he grins ear-to-ear for 3 minutes, then tosses the item on the floor and moves on, those grins are almost worth my $6.99. I think the shopping trip will be a fantastic way to spend my every last dollar lunch hour, and I can't wait. :)

Until then, I must concentrate on the actual web site content I am supposed to be writing. Ugh. Work actually HURTS my brain.

Vacation by the Numbers

Number of my relatives who joined us at the beach: 60

Number of times I used a hair dryer or wore makeup while at the beach: 0

Number of days it took before I could let go of all my annual "beach issues," like worrying over too much scheduling, too many cousins, etc., and just relax: 3

Number of toes I had pedicured with my sister: 10

Number of dread diseases I contracted while at the beach: 2 (strep and pinkeye)

Number of dread diseases DH contracted: 1 (pinkeye, in 2 eyes) -- AJ caught none, thank God

Number of grapes AJ ate: 400

Number of times a day he therefore pooped: at least 3

Number of times he poured water from one plastic bucket to the other: infinite

Number of hours per day he napped, being so tired from sun and surf: 2.5 or 3

Number of ER visits: 1 (not us, but poor G! Hope he's feeling better!)

Number of times we watched the duck movie: lost count after 14

Number of dollars spent on clothes at the outlet mall: approx. $300

Number of sunburns we got: zero! go us with the sunscreen!

Number of times I wished I could be back at work: negative 80

Number of times I was grateful: probably not enough

Number of weeks until next year's vacation: 51

Gratitude journal

No preaching today, I promise. Don't go thinking I'm all good and holy. I'm truly, embarrassingly not. Just sometimes I get a chance to be silent for a while, and it is good for my soul. I like remembering it, so I write it down.

Here's the AJ report: MAN, did he wake up grumpy today! And he was last night, too! No Brush Teef! No Eat! (not even ABCs and 123s from a can. I do not understand him, those are the BEST and a critical kid food-group.) No Tooo (school)! No Mama Room! RRRAWR, it was annoying. Kid needs a damn vacation.

Here's the vaca report: We leave tomorrow! We were going to leave tonight, but I think we need one night to chill on our couch (after we pack), instead of scurrying around like little squirrels in November, like we have done all week -- not to mention giving AJ one more good night's rest to try and kick this cold. So here's to 6:00 am tomorrow!

Here's the gratitude report: 1. For my husband, who takes a figurative punch to the gut every day and continues to push through. I am so grateful for his constancy. 2. For my parents, who are planning (and paying for) another wonderful, relaxing weekend (full week!!) that is so needed I can't even tell you!! 3. For coffee. 4. For Zinc and Echinacea. (yep, my glands are swollen and throat hurts) 5. For the gift of an idea, finally -- an easy Ice Cream Sundaes birthday party at our house -- and a Party City right across the street!

God uses Clorox

I read this post at one of my new favorite-est sites yesterday, about cleaning products. I'm not a huge fan of cleaning, but I do like to live in a clean home, so recently I embarked on the Great Bleaching of the Tile project here at my casa. It went well. I sat on the floor and scrubbed all the grout in our master bath, and BOY, does it look good. It took a minute to get used to, since the outline of every tile appeared to have been erased. It looked like a "blank" floor there, for a while. But it thrilled me to have removed years (yes! years!) of nasty foot residue. (I'll wait while we all *shudder*.... twitch, twitch, *shudder again*... okay. Sorry. Shake it off.)

Last night, inspired by all the Clorox-talk over at Mir's, and needing to disinfect our place from AJ's recent hoarde of germs, I donned the blue gloves and got busy again. This time, the downstairs half-bath. It, too, was in grand need of a washing, and this time I wore gloves because last time, my knuckles actually started to bleed from scraping the floor with bleach as I worked my sanitizing toothbrush! (Don't you feel sorry for me?!) Anyway, last night was a good time to do it. I was tired, and DH was working very late, and AJ had gone to bed, so it was just me and my thoughts and the *bleach fumes. (Note! fumes!)

For some reason, a church song got stuck in my head; I think because of the rhythm of the scrubbing, which was very even, just like the straight rhythm of the eighth notes in these verses. The words go,

"If-an-y-one-lives-with-Me,
Then-they-must-die-with-me,
If-you-hold-firm-you-will-reign-with-me..."

And I wondered to myself, What does that really mean? To die with Jesus? It is, of course, to suffer with him. We always hear, "one must die to one's self." Accept God's will instead of our own. Surrender. The heart is willing but the flesh is weak -- it's not easy to do this. It's suffering... but that's the key! Jesus' death was full of pain, and suffering. And yet, He did it. He didn't want to go through what he went through. He Begged his Father to make it go away. Much like I beg! But if we are to live with Him in eternity, we must die -- suffer -- too. Pretty powerful stuff. I also started thinking, as I Cinderella'd my floors, about the Latin phrase I've learned from the very wise Selkie : Ancilla Domini. I love when she posts under that category -- it means, "handmaid of the Lord." Maid -- handmaid -- Cinderella -- cleaning lady. That's the connection. (Remember, I'm buzzing on fumes by this point!) You know who said ancilla domini, right? Mary! 2nd-best example of accepting God's will! Maybe she "DIN't WANNA" be a mom right away. Maybe she was planning on being an artist, and selling her pottery in the market! Or maybe she simply wanted to enjoy being a housewife for a while. (I know, I know, gender roles... she probably would have been pregnant within a week of her marriage anyway, but who knows what she was thinking. I can adapt the story a bit for the sake of my self-serving-sermon!) But she said, "I am the handmaid of the Lord. Let it be done to me according to thy will." A phrase I need to embrace and embrace again. Every. day.

The bath was half-done at this point, when another appropriate song drifted without warning into my consciousness:

"We shall draw water joyfully,
singing joyfully, singing joyfully,
We shall draw water joyfully
From the wellspring of salvation."

Quite funny, since I was, in fact, drawing (rinse) water from the pink bucket to my left. But again, there was a message: Do your work joyfully. Of course I was joyful to be doing this work (Feet! goo! *shudder*) -- but I asked myself... is there some work, perhaps, in my life, that I do not do joyfully? Hmmm??? Perhaps my clean bathroom floors are God's intention to help me, as I've asked Him to do, learn to accept things in my life with less resistance. Less muck, less whiny b.s. in my heart. More joy. (Not that you should accept the status quo or not try to change your situation, if it's bad; but you know what I mean, right?)

Of course these are all things I've known. But I was happy to have them revealed to me again, in a way I could understand, in the moment. SDW, it was one of those tiny whispers you talked about. :) I'm not done with this topic; I would like to absorb it all and really start living it, but we're all works in progress, all the time. I'll likely never be finished with the work of surrender, because it's hard. Harder than scrubbing floors with a toothbrush. But the reward is similar: Clean floors! Clean heart!

illustrative photo

Please see the antique laundry wringer and my current state of being, to your right. New feature! Instant Personality! Woo!

Zucchini Bread

I made some zucchini bread the other day in an attempt to sneak a vegetable into AJ's banana bread-loving mouth. It is dry. I am a whole wheat flour virgin -- at least I was, until Sunday night -- but how can a recipe with 1 cup canola oil, and a big wad of wet grated zucchini, come out dry? Anyone? Bueller? Is it the whole wheat or my poor cooking? (Don't answer that.) But, do. If you know.