High Class Trash

I am strangely addicted to yet another BravoTV hit, The Real Housewives of Orange County. Show of hands: Anyone? It's a love-hate thing for me -- these women are portrayed as whiny, bitchy, have-it-alls -- and I do mean ALL, we're talking millions of gadollars here. Exactly the type of person that makes me gag.... yet I can't. stop. watching. (Not meaning to judge, of course, because I certainly have everything I could ever want or need and *I* certainly whine and bitch, but you know what I mean.)

Last night rewarded my enduring XBox Live and hockey all week (love you Honey, and there's nothing else on anyway) with TWO episodes. In the first, they were having a Botox Party at a local plastic surgeon's office, complete with sushi, wine, and free consultations. Now I'm no expert on plastic surgeons, but um.... it seems to me if the invitation said they were going to seduce me with fancy wine in a big glass and THEN conduct my free consultation, I would notice that *something is fishy about this.* Sure enough, once the 39-year-old housewife was drunk enough, she thought everything the doctor said was either hysterical or GOSPEL TRUTH. She "wasn't planning to have anything done, but after the doctor told me I needed this lift and that lift..." she jumped right up onto the table for a Botox injection right then and there.

Brilliant of the doctor, I guess. I should give him credit for being a smart businessman and knowing his customers.

The second episode was the 39-year-old's 40th birthday party in which she MOANED and CRIED and RENT HER GARMENTS about turning 40, on her yacht... until her husband presented her with a BIG FAKE "I spent my last few dollars on this" Diamond encrusted -- no, Diamond Covered Rolex. And oh, ho, ho, by "last few" he meant "forty-thousand." The other women, in their confessional scenes where they speak directly to the camera, were all, "It's a rite of passage to receive your first (diamond) Rolex." BWAHH HAHAHAHAHA! God, they are funny. My first Fossil must be the middle-class equivalent. (I love my Fossil.)

After that, she didn't mind being forty so much, though. Go fig. Time to get drunk again, she said, pass the champagne.

It does sort-of bother me that they're calling all these women "housewives" when a) most of them have housecleaners and gardeners and pool-boys, which I'm not sure but I think means they don't fit the traditional definition of the word housewife. And b) two of them aren't even married, they've been divorced for more than 10 years each. ("You keep using dat word... I do not tink it means what you tink-a it means.") In Season One there was a single girl on the show who happened to be dating a very rich Orange County guy whose money she spent hither and yon. Dear Bravo: NOT A HOUSEWIFE.

To think, this used to be the network that showed intelligent, arthouse movies and James Lipton.

And yet... I'm a bit excited that they're doing a New York City spin-off this spring.

Let it snow, and photos

Ooh, they're predicting some sort of cold and precipitation for Wednesday/Thursday! Yay! Maybe we can get a snow-day out of it. You know, big southern city goes all Chicken Little when there's a potential for white stuff coming out of the sky.

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I have been meaning to post a few pictures of the New Year's Eve wedding bash, mostly to show off the world's most adorable three-year-old in a tuxedo:

Practicing our runway walk before the festivities...

Charming the ladies on the dance floor...

Sampling his bartending skills (Sprite, meatballs, pretzels, chocolate-dipped marshmallows, and a strawberry) ... doesn't look like it's much of a hit...hey, I didn't care, it kept him occupied...

and finally...

Causing mom and dad to burst with pride and joy and Happy New Year feelings that will last and last. Awwwwww. Look, all dressed up we're pretty festive!

Things I love

Sunrise. The cool, gradual lift of darkness.


My car. A comfortable ride.


Happy baristas at the drive thru.


The potential of a weekend and a Target gift card in my purse.

Starting to think

I am starting to really think about just HOW this thing is going to work, this BABY thing.

....HOW is it going to work, y'all??

I mean, we had our little routine for getting up and out of the house with one baby:

>get awakened 4:30 or 5am
>warm bottle
>feed bottle, snooze in chair
>place baby back in crib
>go back to bed and snooze a while, if lucky

...and that evolved naturally into "with one kid:"

>wake with alarm, hit snooze
>let kid sleep while we're showering
>wake kid, get him snack or breakfast
>turn on his shows
>get him dressed

We now get it done within about an hour-fifteen (and usually without much screamingKNOCKWOOD). But what exactly happens when you add another baby to that mix? We already wake up at the crack of dawn -- well, I mean, I KNOW that the actual 'crack' of dawn is entirely relative when there's an infant involved -- so am I going to have to wake up and feed the infant at 5:00 am and then just continue on to our regular 5:45 start-time for showers and cereal and shows and scurrying around the dresser and bathroom sink? I guess I will. With no extra time for the snooze button! What am I going to DOOOOO without my SNOOOOOOZE? Sob.

I would say screw the whole thing while I'm on maternity leave, we'll just wake up when we wake up... but we need to keep AJ on his regular schedule as much as we can because GOD KNOWS he is better when he's in his groove. He needs a hat or something that warns: "Does not respond well to change."

Oh wait, I just remembered -- at least during maternity leave I can take my Today Show nap. I mean, if this baby cooperates. It's just crazy that you can't predict! Anything! She may not sleep the same way AJ did! I'm going to have to re-learn everything... with an extra distraction just for a challenge, you know.

Where did I read yesterday... someone's comments section -- a mom said "You're just tired for 16 years. You get used to it."

Every mom is superwoman, I think -- especially those of you with more than TWO! I BOW IN YOUR DIRECTION, YOU AMAZING CREATURES.

The glow of pregnancy

Here's me, showing off my World-Championship Ladies Bowling League gear.

No, wait, that's not it. Those are my "ROCK ON!" eyes and snarl.

No... no... hang on, I'll get it: These are the wrist braces I purchased today from Walgreen's so that my hands will cease feeling like they've been ground to stumps with a hacksaw.

Carpal tunnel, baby. One of the many millions of things they just don't tell you about pregnancy. I never had carpal tunnel before -- even though I've worked mostly at the computer for ten years. AJ gave me a mild case, which never completely disappeared but had become mostly unnoticeable until a few months ago. But that was just some tingling and numbness. Baby #2 is really letting me know how much she needs my good blood flow with PAAAAAIN. So I'm sporting my Hott New Look for winter. In a lovely twist of fate, the weather's gotten warm enough for short sleeves here, for a couple of days, so I can't even hide these monstrosities under a nice sweater. I feel like the biggest dork! All for a good cause, of course, and the braces actually do seem to help. They're a bitch to type with (again, ironic since that's probably why/how I got it in the first place), but the real test will be sleeping with them tonight. That's when the pain level usually shoots up to eleven -- sometimes I'll wake up at night to pee and have to shake and massage my wrists out for ten minutes before they loosen back up.

In other pregnancy griping, my stomach hurts. Just... all the time. I mean, crampy kind of hurting. No, it's not REALLY all the time, just seems like a lot. Don't worry, I have counted. No more than one "contraction" (Braxton-Hicks, obviously) in any given hour. They just seem long. Maybe I'm doing too much. Maybe I need to spend more time on the couch with my friends Haagen and Dazs.

While I was in Walgreen's, I peeked at InStyle magazine's cover story on Katie Holmes. I had no idea she is 30. Here I thought she was a teenage bride but, not really. Just a girl, in love with a boy, OH SIIIIIGHhhhhh, and she loves being a mom. I was disappointed the interviewer didn't ask her one single time if Tom is as wacko as he seems. It was all, like, professional and benefit-of-the-doubt and stuff. Oh well. Katie said "the weather is here, wish you were [as] beautiful [as me]." (Truly, the photos of her were somewhat bizarre and beautiful.)

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Have I told you my secret weapon for parenting? J-E-L-L-O. I swear, the days I make it, you'd think I hung the very moon. Today, just hinting that there was Jello in the fridge for dessert meant AJ cleaned up his snack debris, played nicely with the neighbor kids, read stories willingly with his Dad while I got dinner ready, Pleased and Thank You'd all through the meal ("Mama, do you want me to please pass anything to you?"), patiently endured his bath/shampoo, and went to bed when I said "It's bedtime."

Maybe I'm wrong -- maybe it's the new dresser. But I think it's the Jello.

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Today I received my customized Starbucks gift card in the mail. Have you heard of this? You can create "art," or simply choose a coffee cup with your "signature" drink spelled out on it, or any number of other mod designs. I can't wait to use it tomorrow. Thanks, Mom!

More bold moves

First it was OUT with the list-making.

Then today, I actually said NO to something, just because I DIDN'T WANT TO DO IT. This all-good-for-me, all the time, attitude is surprising.

The commitment was a request to sub for a cantor at Mass this Saturday. At first, I quickly but reluctantly typed out, "Sure, I can take it, Ralph. Hope you have a very Happy Birthday. Send me the song list if you can." Then I backspace-deleted every letter and typed,

"Sorry, Ralph, I'm afraid I'm already committed for Saturday. Hope someone else can sub for you. Have a very Happy Birthday!"

(Even though guess what? I'm not committed!) DANG, that feels good. I hit "Send" with no regret.

Look at me, I'm all zen and stuff

Believe me, if I had anything to say, I'd be blogging it. People are writing such gosh-dang funny things these first few days of 2008. I'd say it's going to be another banner year for the Mighty Internet. I just hope I'll have something to contribute, too.

This weekend we're going to get a dresser for AJ's room, and once we have that, I feel like many other things will snap into place. I can move his clothes into there, and thus move Baby's clothes out of the corner of MY room, and once AJ's clothes are there, his toys might as well be, too, and I can CLEAN UP FREAKIN' CHRISTMAS which is as of yet, still strewn about the living room floor. (Just his toys, I mean, and the tree. Which we plan to take down tonight.)

(He's already sleeping in his new room, btw. I think he likes it there.)

So really, that one item of business ought to make my entire home come to order in one hot second -- at least that's how I'm choosing to look at it. All hail the dresser.

I have not made any single list in 2008. Not counting my work to-do list, of course. But I'll tell you, not having every item of crap in front of me on a dog-eared piece of paper has greatly helped my mood. I'm just taking things one at a time and trying to be careful of getting overwhelmed. Sometimes I start listing in my head, and have to stop myself. (Dreft... hospital bag... mostly baby-arrival things. But I have time.)

I wonder how long I'll be able to keep this up? More later. It's Friday night, after all!

Just fine, and how was yours?

I suppose the thing to do would be to get out my to-do list, place it neatly on my desk, and start a clean page with "Jan 2 - Jan 4," underlined. Then begin listing out the must-do work-tasks of the day: finish the XYZ sitemap. Start the annual review paperwork. Invoice job #4022. Update project tasks list.

But GAWD, doesn't that all sound depressing?

Instead, I'm still trying to enjoy some of the lingering scent of the holidays that have come and gone. (But not the evergreen centerpiece my mother-in-law sent us; no, no, it was lovely -- beautiful, even -- but I think my pregnancy hormones are misinterpreting pine needles. To me it smells like B.O. every time I walk by it. What a bummer. I usually love evergreen.) The scents I like to remember are the ones of tape and wrapping paper being ripped and balled up, of mashed potatoes that turned out smooth and not-too-salty, of plentiful Honey-Baked Ham leftovers but Taco Bell for lunch on the 27th ANYWAY, and this year, of bridesmaids' hairspray and delicious lemony wedding cake.

Yes, my brother-in-law got married Monday night, New Year's Eve! We had a fancy party to attend for the first time in... ever. It was nice to get all dressed up and go someplace with good food, a dance floor, and an open bar (Sprite for me, WITH LIME, oooooh). In general the "wedding weekend" was a bit of a logistical disaster, but I think that comes with the territory. I managed to keep my good attitude up front EXCEPT:

> a couple of hours before the wedding -- when my DARLING BIL the groom called his mother to "run to the mall" for him real quick, and by the way, if I come over would you make me something to eat?? ...and then...

> during the ceremony, for which AJ had walked BEAUTIFULLY down the aisle holding hands with me and generally making my heart burst with pride and joy, and looking SO ADORABLE in his tuxedo... when he began whining out loud for 15 minutes straight, "Mama I wantta go OUUUUUT. I wantta go OUUUUUT. I need to go POTTTTY. (Which he didn't, but was using as an excuse, to which I replied: Hush, honey, in one minute.) It's been ONE MINUUUUUUTE..... WAAAHhhh..." causing the minister to notch up his volume a bit for the ring ceremony. I finally decided there was nothing to do but take him out and I will always remember it as stomping back down the aisle and then speaking harshly to the little guy outside through embarrassed hot tears, as everyone else watched the bride and groom kiss and be announced as Mr. and Mrs. I hate that I couldn't just laugh and say "HEY, he's THREE," and forgive him on the spot for nothing -- he did nothing wrong, he was just himself, a three-year-old asked to stand in a fancy suit and be still. But I let my pride get the best of me.

Definitely lost my cool there for a moment.

I shouldn't even post that -- I'd rather not remember it, except when AJ himself gets engaged someday and has a three-year-old niece or nephew or cousin that he thinks would be a great nominee for "wedding party member." Heh.

Anyway, we're back, the New Year has begun. I may or may not make any lists today, and my only resolution is to try to make each day better than the last. I think that about covers everything.

Gerunds, and a well-planned Christmas morning

Am doing a bit of sorry-for-myself-feeling, what with the first-to-the-office-being today: Friday, the last day before vacation-beginning. I am the pregnant one! Shouldn't *I* be doing more easy-it-taking than most people? Yes, decidedly. But nooooo, I have project-managing to attend to. Stoopid money-making.

Anyway, last night I was talking with Maryb and she shared with me the very logical, sensible Christmas morning plan that her family has followed through the years. I want to write it down so that someday when my life turns organized and sensible (!), I can consider it.

First, some personal history. It seems our Christmas mornings as teens -- that is, the ones I remember most clearly, which became our usual tradition -- were slightly chaotic. We never liked going to the 4:00pm Christmas Eve Children's Mass at our church because it was standing-room only, and a little bit ridiculous. The youth group always did this crazy thing where, right before the blessing and dismissal, they sent an "elf" or "elves" up the aisle with jingle bells (one year the guy ran screaming and hollering excitedly - and very stupidly) to announce SANTA'S ARRIVAL! And then Santa would process around the church for a few minutes making all the children go wild and... well, it was just too much after a Mass that went over an hour in the first place. Not to mention ruining the solemnity of Christmas Eve, GAH. So we generally preferred singing with my cousins at the 8:30am Mass Christmas morning.

However! That meant waking up at the crack of dawn to get the presents opened (tree first, then stockings) and still have time for showers. Which we wanted to do before Mass, because right AFTER Mass we had all the family over for brunch, most of those years. It wasn't a BAD way to do it, but it wasn't quite cozy and relaxed. (No one's fault, Mom! Don't go feeling bad! Still good memories, I promise -- I mean, Christmas brunch?? That right there is divinely inspired.)

But here's how Maryb's family did it:

Wake up. Open STOCKINGS first. Her Santa *wrapped* all the stocking presents, and that was the way the kids knew which wrapping paper under the tree was "theirs." This way, Santa did not have to give himself away with his handwriting on gift tags! wink wink! Brilliant. Each kid had his own pattern and discovered it on his own. So while they did that, Mom and Dad had coffee, and Mom put cinnamon rolls in the oven. (Mmmm, cinnamon rolls.) Cozy.

After stockings, they took a break for breakfast. And that turned into a break for 8:30 Mass. Again, brilliant, because no one goes to 8:30 Mass on Christmas morning so it's nice and quiet, and really, the anticipation is almost as much fun as the opening of presents. Putting it off for one hour (8:30 Mass is quick since no one's there) didn't hurt anything. Then after that, they'd come home and tackle the presents under the tree. And have the rest of the day to play, or make dinner, or whatever.

Doesn't that seem smart to you? What's your Christmas morning schedule?

Our house hasn't really established one yet. Last year AJ woke up, glanced at the presents, then declared he wanted his Froot Loops. Ha! We waited. I have a feeling this year will be different, but we'll just have to see. I haven't decided about Mass times, and I want to do breakfast. Oh well, whatever way it works out will be perfect. It's the togetherness anyway, not the logistics. Have a merry one, everybody! :)

Round up: Thoughts

> I've simply got to get started on work, but don't have the necessary oomph. As any holiday approaches, my work motivation just starts seeeeeping out the cloth walls of the cube. By Friday I'll have nothing.

> We've finally started receiving Christmas cards, hooray! It's the only time of the year when getting the mail is actually fun. Unless you subscribe to Southern Living like I do, and then once a month you have a fun mailbox. I finally have enough cards to display them on the pantry door. One of AJ's big things lately is wanting to tape his artwork to every available cabinet door in the house, so this is a good project for him. Hey, I bought him a glue stick the other day. HOURS of fun! I just cut out random images from Reader's Digest, and he sticks them to a piece of construction paper! How easy is that?! He made his first masterpiece the other day and was SUPER excited to give it to Daddy "for his office." CUTE!!

> Speaking of artwork and 3 year olds -- are they supposed to be able to hold the pencil/marker/crayon correctly yet? AJ wants to write the alphabet, and sort-of can, but he's holding the writing instrument... mmm, how to describe?... his fist curls over the top of the crayon instead of around the side/back. DH and I debate over whether we should correct that or not. I'm sure he'll get it eventually. I kinda want to make it easier on him. However, he isn't much interested in trying the 'right' way, so I guess I just answered my own question: Leave him alone.

> We seem to have turned the corner on this latest round of tantrumy behavior from him. I tell ya, every time I should remind myself, THIS IS JUST A PHASE! But in the thick of it, you really forget. You start analyzing and doubting and being sad and worried. BOO for that! I suspect it is easier with the second child.

> She, by the way, was kicking/punching me on both sides of my stomach this morning at 3. Like SHE was having little fits. DEAR LORD, already??

> I got the daycare teachers $10 Target gift cards, and the 3 directors $10 Chick Fil A gift cards (because they get out for lunch). Everyone seemed pleased.

That is all.

Poppyseed Bread

Not necessarily festive, but altogether delicious!

(makes 2 loaves)

3 cups all purpose flour
2.5 cups sugar
1.125 cups (that's one and one-eighth cups) vegetable or canola oil
1.5 cups milk
3 eggs
.5 tsp salt
1.5 tsp baking powder ('exsqueeze me? baking powder?' I always think this. Still.)
1.5 tsp vanilla extract
1.5 tsp almond extract
1.5 tsp butter extract
2 tsp poppyseeds

Grease 2 loaf pans. Mix all ingredients together with a spoon, pour into pans, and bake at 350 for one hour.

Glaze:

.25 cup orange juice
.75 cup sugar
.5 tsp vanilla ext.
.5 tsp butter ext.
.5 tsp almond ext.

Bring to a boil and pour over hot bread.

Only thing hard about this recipe is that you may not have butter extract on-hand. But you SHOULD!! I found it at my regular grocery store. And it will seem like there is too much glaze. Not so! It'll soak in and make everything even more LOVELY.

PS - sorry about the decimals. I wanted to do 1/4c for the 1/4c items, but then it was inconsistent and I had to edit that. Decimals seem much less elegant but then again, cooking is the only science I've ever loved, so there ya go.

Um, just one more thing...

Two friends said they actually LIKE the stressy posts. So, stressy it is:

-- Why THIS WEEK of all weeks, did we have a virus attack one of our servers?? (Part of my company's job is that we host some web sites that we've designed, although we don't have servers OR technical people on-site. I.E., ME, I am not a technical person and I don't know how to fix it -- but I'll get to field the phone calls of pissed-off clients.) The one guy from our group who seems to enjoy fussing over and "deploying solutions to" this kind of problem is, of course, out of town. *Sing-song voice:* LOVE-LY!

-- And BTW, corporate IT who run our email: GET REMOTE WEBMAIL TO WORK, dammit! We're in the middle of a weekend server-virus-crisis but can't check our email because.... I don't know why because. Because our multi-national company still runs a crappy version of LOTUS NOTES instead of Outlook, like the rest of the free world.

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That's it for real stress this Monday morning. And do I really care? No. This weekend in family-world, we knocked a whole bunch of crap off the list, like mailing Christmas cards (whose idea...? nevermind), getting haircuts, buying and wrapping a few more gifts, and baking. I made Lemon Poppyseed bread, which is really more like cake, and I'll post the recipe soon, AND I made my favorite peanut-chocolate "cussters" as AJ is calling them. That recipe:

Melt some chocolate bark. Dump in some cocktail peanuts. Stir. Spoon into cluster shapes on wax paper. The end.

I also had lunch with a friend Saturday, and laughed and laughed with her, and then attended a really fun Christmas party with some other friends -- a cast of characters for sure -- that made me COUNT MY BLESSINGS. (Swistle: haHA! You're so right! But still.) Let's just say there were cards and appetizers and one man farting outright, which was gross and so NOT in the Christmas spirit, but... still funny, and I felt like PART of the group, and the women talked in one room while the men looked at a video game in the other room until we raised our eyebrows to the vaulted ceilings to get them to quit and come be merry with us. And they were. AJ was beyond cute and everyone told me so. I think he may even have beaten out a 10-month-old for receiving the Most Attention. Look, he may not be very socially active among his own generation, but the kid knows how to work a room of adults, I'll give him that. Could be a very handy skill one day.

Finally, one of my favorite things was putting my Christmas china front and center in the china cabinet on Sunday while AJ napped. It looks so festive and it makes me surprisingly happy to putter around --gently... ever...so...gently...-- with bone china. :)

Christmas Past, Present, and Future

So! *Brisk claps* (hat tip to Swistle) No more stupid stress-n-drang talk! Pinky swear.

On to fun holiday questionnaires from Sophie.


I'm supposed to tell you my favorite childhood gift, my favorite gift I received as an adult, and a gift I would like to receive in the future.

BUT FIRST: Important, and relative, Literature Question: In your opinion, did Scrooge have a really vivid dream, or was he ACTUALLY visited in the night by those famous Christmas ghosts? I mean, as "actually" as possible -- it is a story, after all. Just curious -- either way, he was morally moved and ultimately redeemed, so it's all good. I personally think it was a dream. But since it's a story, it COULD have been a real visitation...

My favorite childhood Christmas gift: It's pretty hard to decide. The two that stand out are my kitchen set -- a white wooden stove and sink that must have been hand-painted -- and my JAM BOX, received when I was about 11 and listening to the radio for the first time. Y'all, it had a DOUBLE tape deck. I pirated many a cassette with that gift. I believe that was also the year I received Wham! Make It Big and Mr. Mister, Welcome To the Real World, so I was rockin' hard core.

My favorite adulthood gift: The first Christmas DH and I were married, he surprised me with an extra stocking gift -- a velvet box with these teeny diamond chip earrings. He said, "I had to get you something sparkly." Awww. I don't wear them very often, but that doesn't mean I don't love them. They mean a whole lot to me. It was such a sweet, young-love romantic gesture.

A gift wish for the future: One day, probably not next year or even the year after that, but one day, I'd really like to do a kitchen remodel. It's not something that can be wrapped up with ribbons and bows, but it sure will take the place of any gifts for me the year we decide to do it!

No taggies today, if you want to play let me know so I can come see!

Alright, this is just getting insane

The lists are going to eat me alive. I'm making more lists. I'm making lists to organize my lists. I want to clean everything. I want to put away stuff in AJ's new room so when I glance in there I don't see loose screws and brackets rolling around on the nightstand. I want to BAAAAAAKE. Lemon Poppyseed bread, cookies, heck, I even want to make banana pudding which I don't really like (but hubby does) and I feel like Making Stuff and making him Happy. And I happen to have some pudding mix on-hand.

This is nesting, right?

Other things that are insane:
- That my manager can't say "Staff meeting at 10," he has to say "staff meet at 10." Meet. Never MEET-ING. Not even "Mtg." "meet." All lowercase. Makes me twitch.

- That my back-door neighbor, always a strange yardbird, and that's the only way we know him, really, by watching him do yardwork.... decided yesterday to pile all of his raked leaves in the drainage ditch that runs through his yard.... and ours. So, we're all under a drought watch and outdoor watering ban, right? He can't burn the leaves until we get about four feet of rain and are able to use our hoses again. And whose yard is going to flood if we DO get any rain? That's right, mine. His leaves are going to cause a backup, I just know it. So he burned a few last night in a barrel, which, despite the outdoor watering ban *HELLO SAFETY VIOLATION I WANTED TO CALL THE COPS,* was preferable to letting them sit in the ditch... I think?

- Three-year-olds.

- That this week my only two freelance projects both come due, GAH, while I have no free time because of an influx of office work projects, too! I'll handle it, just... pardon me one more time while I WHII-YI-Y-YIIINE.

- That AJ turned down his beloved Pop Tart this morning for a Clementine instead. What the... who the...?

I should point out that my Dear Husband could sense my sanity level sinking this weekend (might have been all the crying out loud) and ushered me out of the house on Sunday afternoon. I had my nails done. It was lovely.

EDITED TO ADD: Sorry, guys. Really sorry. I just revisited my archives from the last, what, 3 months? and every other post has been, "I'm stressed and I'm busy." BULLlAAAGHGAHH. So boring. I will try to come up with a different topic, I sware. ;)

Fat on top, but not "fat on time"

Or: el-e-e rambles on and on -- be warned

Something I forgot about pregnancy and weight gain, as I have gone about my merry way eating every brownie and snack-pack of M&Ms I can find, is that you gain weight not only in your belly, but also around the torso -- the shoulders and triceps and, naturally, the chestseses. Padding and extra fat for making milk and all that jazz. I was cruelly reminded of this fact yesterday when I took my bridesmaid dress to be altered. Horrifying. I haven't been wearing all that many spaghetti straps lately, you know. I hadn't noticed. I was a bit surprised to be so stinking voluptuous. These wedding photos are going to be happy memories, aren't they? Gaaah. Oh well, motivation I suppose. In the three weeks from now 'til the wedding, I don't suppose my little 2.5-pound handweights are going to do one ounce of good, especially since I plan to CONITNUE eating brownies. It's Christmas for Pete's sake. So screw it. I'll be the fat bridesmaid and everyone will marvel when they look back at 2007, and say, "Wow, she really lost that pregnancy weight, didn't she?" YES THEY WILL.

I feel like I just can't, and will never, catch up with my December schedules and to-do lists. Every time I scratch one item off, I definitely add a few others. Every day at lunch is some errand that must be accomplished TODAY. It's only the 7th but I feel like I'm already late shipping presents to Seattle and Virginia and various other locales. Is everyone else getting this unnecessary "hurry-up" vibe? I heard "It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas" this morning on the radio and thought, "Beginning?? Sheesh, people, where have YOU been? We're late, we're late for a very impor-tant-date!"

Deep breaths. Deeeeeep breaths.

Hey, I KNOW you people buy some holiday gifts that are perishables. Chocolates, fruits, etc. There comes a point in your life when you just don't think you need any. more. random. STUFF, so your neighbors and uncles and parents' friends, whose homes have been filling up 20 years longer than yours, don't either. Do you go with Hickory Farms or Harry & David, in those cases? Is there a favorite gourmet food gift that you give? We had a client once who always sent us Crate & Barrel's Christmas snacks, which are DIVINE. I like those. Last year, I was introduced to John & Kira's floral chocolates, and WOW. They're pretty snazzy. Sometimes I just run to World Market and pick up something that looks international, hoping it suffices. If you have some fancy regional or local food item that I need to check out and can order online (I have about 3 gifts of this sort that I need to buy), spill it!

Wouldn't it be fun to hear some of the RESULTS of all this Christmas-purchasing frenzy? I think it would. I can't tell you everything, because many of my recipients read this blog. But I can tell you a few things:

For Nanny (DH's grandmother): 2 twenty-five-dollar Schwann's gift certificates. We got her these last year and she hasn't stopped raving about how useful they were. She has shopped with Schwann's for years.

For my MIL: The new Eagles' CD; a hand-painted ceramic plaque that says, "I am woman. I am invincible. I am tired." (ha!) Saw that and loved it and it's definitely her style; an Emerilware skillet that she asked for.

For my FIL: a pair of jeans; a Thrashers ballcap; half of a new office chair (we're counting on my brother in law to pay the other half and actually purchase this -- I'm not sure he can be counted on, but I hope so. *Add to to-do list: DH needs to call BIL and remind him.*)

For my secret-Santa cousin: a book I think she will like (and now Sis probably knows who I got)

For AJ: Shake-n-Go Crash Cars racetrack; 2 new Imaginex dinosaurs (from Gammy, but posing as From Santa); an air-powered football kicker-guy; 3 Berenstain Bears books; a preschool-appropriate clock for his room (from Grandmommy but might pose as From Santa); and for his stocking, some animal figurines, loads of stickers, some candy, etc. etc. We're still mulling over the V-Tech or Leapster handheld. Can't decide. I'd love to hear what you're buying.

Add a Dash of Meaning

I'll admit that I got caught up in a bit of a frenzy right after Thanksgiving, in preparation for the small party we had this past weekend. We decorated the house and have been ordering and buying and wrapping presents... even baked some goodies. We also had a birthday party thrown in there for extra stress good measure, and so the "spirit" of the season so far has basically been one of Hurry Up and Git R Done, as we say here in Georgia.

However, I would really prefer to have an appropriately anticipatory ADVENT. (Say it 3 times fast: GO!) Last year I managed to remember that we "deck the halls" for a reason -- to quietly create a space in our homes and hearts to welcome the King. And this year.... well, we didn't make it to Mass on the first Sunday of Advent (or the last Sunday of Ordinary Time, either) if that's any indication.

It makes me sad when we don't make it to church. But that's another topic for another day.

Onward. Advent. Looking forward. I did let AJ help me set up our nativity scene on the fireplace hearth, and it felt good to share that with him, telling him who these characters are, and what they are doing at the stable. Of course, he wants to put them ALL in the "house," so they don't get wet when it rains. I have to keep telling him that the shepherd with that lamb in his arms can't go in, because that lamb is too loud and will definitely wake up the baby Jesus. And that the 3 wise men are just visiting -- it isn't their house and they didn't wipe their feet, so they need to stay outside and just watch.

It's cute, and he's learning the Christmas story bit by bit.

I'd like to do the following other Adventy, preparatory things this year:

1. Get an Advent wreath. I say this every year and have yet to do it. I like the idea of having one at home and then the kids noticing, hey, there's one at church, too! (This has more impact if we start GOING to church, ahem.) I'm not saying we need to do all the prayers around it or anything that devout; I just kinda feel like it'd be nice to have one. THINGS beget questions, and questions become teaching opportunities. And besides, I like candles and need a centerpiece for the dining room table.

2. Paint or make some ornaments. There's a great how-to here," -- hey, look at that, I'm an "editor!" what fun to collaborate with kara marie! -- but I might not actually BAKE ornaments. I think I have some ceramic ones already in a craft drawer somewhere. It's still a fun activity and maybe AJ can paint some and then decide whom he'd like to give them to. Thus teaching him about the spirit of giving, instead of receiving, see.

3. Hmm. Why don't you help me here. Do you do any Adventy things? A paper chain? A Jesse Tree (OVERACHIEVER)? Even if it's just driving around the neighborhood one evening, looking at all the lights (we're TOTALLY doing that, too). Make our December meaningful. :)

Cute-isms and oddities of the weekend

AJ was sitting at the table eating a snack, when his foot must have fallen asleep. He said, "Ow, Mama! My foot feels all sparkly!"

----

Saturday night, we woke to a little boy standing by the bed saying he'd had a bad dream. (First time this has ever been reported live and in person!) He naturally proceeded to kick us in the ribs the rest of the night, and was ready to wake up by 6:00am. Gah.

----

This morning around 4:30, Hubby woke me to point out that AJ was sleeping on the floor, in the corner of our room, wedged between the armoire and some CD binders. Why there? Who knows. We thought it best to return him to his own bed. He didn't mention it when we all woke up later, and we didn't ask.

Have yourself a ranty little Christmas

Listen, I understand that the radio stations are businesses, and that they have to play more than 12 songs in their rotations, in order that people will listen and not switch the station, in order to get the good ads. So I know that musicians need to write new versions of old songs. How else will the station fill 24 hours of Christmas Tunes, now 'til Christmas?? How, I ask you! But I have BONES TO PICK -- mostly music-nerd and English-nerd bones, so bear with me, here -- with some of the newest versions of 2 of my favorite Christmas carols. OH MY GOD.

First, someone has recorded a very swing-y, very filled-out version of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas." There are a lot of embellishments and odd syncopations, and it is rubbing me the wrong way. Because, listen to the words: Merry Little Christmas. It's a little thing. A delicate, simple notion of Christmas. The words spell out what the music should be. The four even eighth notes of the original "mer-ry lit-tle" are ON PURPOSE, people.

That one gets a warning -- minor offense.

Over on the local Christian station, someone else has done a big band/swing version of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas." This one doesn't bother me as much with its swing rhythm, because it's big band in very obvious ways, like lots of horns and a big, brassy, round vocal lead -- he sounds like Michael Buble or Harry Connick and I really like those guys. HOWEVER. This version has hijacked the lyrics for Extreme Right Evangelicalism and it pisses me off. It says,

"Through the years, we all will be together,
If His grace allows...
Hang a shiny star upon the highest bough..."

Nothing wrong with "If His Grace allows," I guess, but nothing wrong with saying "the Fates," either!! I mean, dang, it's just LITERATURE. Just mythology, the first stories the world ever had. But NOooo, we wouldn't want to allude to something other than GOD allowing things to happen, not even innocent, literary Fate. That wouldn't be Christian enough. Errrrrrgh. Annoying. I almost can't listen to this one.

Traffic ticket. You have violated the song in a big way.

Finally. This week I have heard 2 separate versions of "The Little Drummer Boy," both with LOUD drums and/or background vocals like Doo-wops or Doot-doots, intruding on the song. Here again, you idiot "songwriters" of today: LOOK AT THE LYRICS. The beauty of this song is its simplicity. The older, choral version (that thankfully, you still hear on the radio), barely has any accompaniment. That is no accident! The haunting silence of the moment where the little drummer boy offers to play his drum is what MAKES this song. Am I right? The pause before... "Then... He smiled at me...." ?? Is BEAUTIFUL. Makes your throat catch in the back. BEGS to be followed by a reverent, appropriate ending: "Me and my drummm." My simple, tiny, seemingly insignificant drum. That made God the baby smile. NOT my LOUD, FAST, BASHING DRUM-SOLO DRUM, which is, I swear, what one of these ridiculous versions served up.

APPALLING. Go to Jail. Go directly to Jail. Do not pass Go, do not collect any candy canes from me.

Score!

Shopping solo on lunch break: One of the perks of being a working mom.
Also, shopping for clothes: One of the perks of being pregnant. Must shop! No alternative, nothing fits! (Certainly can't go naked, no one wants that!)

Anyway, I totally forgot there's a Motherhood store by my office. Went in there today and spent a cool Benjamin - lots on sale.

These two sweaters for $14.99 each. Totally can be dressed up or down. Not too heavy (it's only in the 50s-60s here, not freezing arctic like the Old Navy Christmas commercials want you to think).

Precious pink (almost too pink, but my heart called out to it) blouse. Not on sale, but I will wear it a lot between now and Feb 24th, and it'll help ease Hubby's transition to the Pink-i-Side Layer. ("CATS" reference. Anyone? Bueller?)

Check out this ruffley blouse. NINE-ninety-nine, baby. I almost bought two. Probably should have, but I also needed jeans, and found some in Large-Petite. I don't think you need a visual on jeans, but they're appropriately cute.

I am proud of myself and happy to have some new things. I looked for a coat/jacket -- don't think I can get through all of winter without one that closes properly in the front -- but they didn't have my size. Bummer. Shopping is fun if you allow yourself!

I also went to Party City for some pirate-costume stuff. Our next-door neighbor turns four, and wants a pirate party with everyone (including parents) dressed up. ARRRRgh, matey. But at least PC had some stuff -- eye patches, small swords, a Jolly Roger hat. AJ is going to be cute again this weekend, pictures to follow!

Then I bought a 6-inch Subway and SunChips. Score, again. It's been a VERY good day so far.

Thursday Thirteen

There's a girl in my office who just graduated from college in May of '07, so this is her first year in the real world of No Christmas Month Off. It has made me remember of some things I loved about Christmastime in college.

1. Um, having a MONTH OFF. We used to finish exams around the 9th or 10th of December, and not return from Winter Break until January 6th or something. That was so awesome.

2. Finals and Reading Week. Yeah, I know that's crazy, but I was a nerd. I liked having no classes to attend, and getting to manage my own study-time however I saw fit. I especially liked the exams that weren't "exams" so much as "homework," like the take-home tests in English. Holing up in a cozy library study carrel for hours. Pages of essay questions, and you could use your textbooks for reference. They were tiring, but not as stressful as a timed scan-tron form.

3. Being in the chorus. We always performed a Festival of Nine Lessons and Carols, which I'd never heard of until college. (My previous Catholic choirs didn't do all the fancy Anglican stuff back at home! Such a tragedy!) It was a busy time but the biggest extra-curricular event of my year, for four years. I loved everything about it -- choir robes, candles, processions, decorating the huge church, the solemnity, readings from a King James version, professors in regalia, and of course, the music.

4. I especially loved the years when my parents came for the Festival -- and freshman year, when Maryb came with them.

5. There's one spot on campus I can remember feeling very "wintery;" a small bridge that went over the creek. Always felt quaint and silent to me.

6. Making mix tapes (TAPES!) of my dorm-mates' Christmas music. I know I had at least 2 of these and they were so fun. One has John Denver singing with the Muppets.

7. I didn't love this at the time, but I love to remember the fact that I sometimes rode home with the most RANDOM people -- people I didn't really know, but who lived near Pensacola and left a "ride-share" note on the campus post office wall. I can think of one group, especially, that was just an odd combination of kids, but turned out to be a decent road trip. I just think it's funny, spending that time with basic strangers, whom I've never seen again and didn't impact my life in any real way -- but they were part of it.

8. Ohmigosh, I nearly forgot -- Mark and Jason's annual Christmas party! Two friends of mine always put on a huge bash in their basement apartment before we left for home. One of the "features," besides Dundee's Honey Brown, was a huge sheet of white butcher paper, fastened to the dark hallway wall, where we'd draw pictures and write stupid drunk messages to each other. I mean, um, not me, Mom... I wrote stupid sober messages of course.

9. Shopping for my family at Lenox Mall, which, at the time, felt so refined and big-city. I especially loved taking the shuttle with my friend, Kim, before I had my car on campus.

10. Care packages from Mom and Dad. I think I received one with hot chocolate once. :)

11. Mistletoe. Not kissing under it, but the fact that it was growing in the trees on the quad. I'd never seen it "live" before -- didn't know where it came from, actually, 'til I saw it at college.

12. Christmas cards. Actually sending some of my own, after I got home for break, to friends from all over that I'd met at school.

13. Senior year, my roommate and I moved off-campus to an apartment of our own. We got our first Christmas tree and hosted a "trim-the-tree" party where we asked each guest to bring an ornament. Some friends made ornaments, others bought them, and I still hang some of them on our family tree, now. Fun to remember where they came from. I think new couples should do this so if you know of someone who's having an "our first Christmas" this year, pass this idea on!

Happy Thursday! Go visit other participants! thursdaythirteen.com

One of our holiday traditions

The holidays for me (and my Mom -- did I tell you I'm turning into my Mom?) are all about Tradition. That's with a capital T, and the word pops out of our mouths more than absolutely necessary: when we do something that we may have done once before. I guess we just want to attach meaning to family time, in every possible instance. For example, buying Barnie's "Santa's White Christmas" flavored coffee, which I did yesterday at my regular old Publix: We have to say, "It's Tradition," with a grin. For some reason we feel the need to declare that fact, even though... who cares what kind of coffee I buy? (My Mom does.)

It's delicious, by the way.

Last night we began getting out all our Christmas decorations, and I decided we needed to put up the tree, hang ornaments with AJ, and then toast with hot chocolate, per Tradition. We're having a small party on Saturday night and I want the house to be decorated. (Aside: I'm pretty darn excited about this party, even though it's not a big deal -- not a "Christmas Open House" or a fancy "Holiday Desserts and Champagne" kind of shindig where everyone dresses in velvet and black patent leather. It's just a few work buddies and their spouses. But A) it's a grown-up party -- all the people we've invited are older than me, no college friends (heh), and B) Every year I LONG to have a holiday party but never really have the time or the momentum to schedule one. So this year, thanks to Husband's momentum, I get to! I also got to go to the mountains in the early fall this year, so some of the things I've wished were Tradition are maybe coming to be. ...and you see how neatly I snuck that in? I've done these things exactly ONCE but I'm declaring them.) I was supposed to put a few things up, like the wreath and some candles, while I worked at home yesterday, but it just didn't happen so I already felt behind. Then AJ lingered over his dinner and dilly dallied while NOT washing his hands as asked, so we were getting pretty thin on time.

I'm making a short story long. What I want to tell you is that our Tradition, every year, is to hurry with the artificial tree primping and fluffing -- yes we use an artificial tree and we LOVE IT. It's totally paid for itself for 5 years running and I think it has at least 2 more years of life in it. Then I typically start wrapping the lights around, starting at the top. Then DH looks at me and says, "Oh... you're starting at the top?" Then I get defensive and say, "YES. This is how I do it every year." Rrrr. If he's so smart why do *I* do it every time, I wonder.

He turns, and probably rolls his eyes while he continues checking strings at the nearest outlet. I get two strings placed in the branches, then realize the prong ends aren't going to line up right with the extension cord at the bottomdammit. Meanwhile, DH has found 2 strings that are half multi-colored and half dead. So we explain to AJ that the lights don't work and the lights are a grown-up job but the ornaments are a kid job, and we really just can't do ornaments until tomorrow night. (And I am so glad we hadn't told him about the hot chocolate.)

He complies reluctantly and once he's in bed, I'll SIGH and say, "WHY is putting up the lights always so difficult?" And DH tells me the story (a Christmas story!) of when he lived with his 2 married friends, Andy and Pam, and how every year Andy "did the lights all wrong" according to Pam, who would get so mad she'd leave the house, so he thinks Christmas lights aren't really a good activity for a marriage. -- I SWEAR, he tells me this story every year because I ask him. Every year! -- So then I go to Walgreen's or Target (daily mention) to pick up a few more strings of lights, and we start at the bottom this time with the lights plugged IN, Duh, and do the squint tests and finish in about a half-hour. We're usually still on speaking terms after this.

Can't you just hear Tevye singing?

Things I am thankful for, re: our trip

• Because my brother in law was away, we got to sleep in his very comfortable king-sized bed (we usually have an older, floppy full-size).
• Emeril's Butternut Squash, Sausage and Wild Rice soup added a special touch to our turkey dinner (at least to me it did).
• We had a nice lunch with some family friends on Saturday, and got AJ and DH fitted for their wedding tuxes -- the mall was deserted by Saturday!
• My MIL really restrained herself, I think, with the Christmas gifts for AJ. We didn't have to rent a U-Haul to get them all home (an improvement over last year)! Also, am thankful that she's so generous and wants him to have one of everything. :) Also, am thankful that she didn't load ME down with Christmas tchotchkes ("Here, take this, it's so cute").
  
• While excessive, the 4 Xmas gifts he DID get to open from family friends were very cool and he's played with all of them a lot already.
• The bathroom remodel at MIL's house -- new counter and cabinets! Pretty!
• Staying up late Friday night to watch The Departed. I don't know why but that made me happy.
• Of course, turkey-dressing-cranberry-sauce sandwiches.
• AJ said he had so much fun, and was sad to leave Gammy's house, and that is how it should be for a kid. :)
  
• Traffic was not that bad coming or going.

How was yours? Did you survive your annual family drama? (I made my own, in my head, but I *think* I managed to keep my opinions to myself and my general demeanor pleasant. I hope so; I can be a brat and know I need to work on the demeanor thing. I likely won't talk about it here, btw. If you can't say something nice, and all.)

Welcome to the Christmas season! (My to-do list is a mile long!)

There is no one in my office but me

When I used to ride to work with DH, we came to the office really early, and sometimes arrived before anyone else. I always liked that "silent time" and was always slightly disappointed when the next worker-bee would trudge up the stairs. Today is the pseudo-holiday, so lots of folks are out and it's been a loooong time since I've been alone in the cube farm. (Or alone, period, really, save my commute-time.)

Alone is GOOD.

I used to relish time alone when I was a kid -- I remember going into my closet, flipping the light on and shutting the door, just playing by myself or reading, listening to a record, or rearranging my stuff on the shelves. It was like a whole secret room and no one else was allowed. (The cool thing about that closet? It was wallpapered and carpeted. Go my parents! Nice feature!)

This morning while driving I listened to "The Rosary is a Place," the CD I won from Et tu's Jen a few weeks ago. I was convinced that I would think it hokey, despite my great love of Christian music and such, especially the heartstrings-tugging kind that makes me cry sometimes. But the rosary, recorded? Hmm. I knew my soul probably needed that CD, and that's what I'd told Jen, but... I don't know. As Maggie says, I'd probably rather be watching TV.

However, the CD is... nice. It has a gentle-looking Franciscan priest on the cover, and I like the Franciscans. They staffed our parish when I was a kid so they feel like "home." And I like saying the Rosary once in a while during the ol' morning rush-hour. I don't know if that makes me odd, or a religious nut, but it's sure a heck-of-a-lot more calming than watching the cars around me, or listening to NPR talk about Pakistan AGAIN. (I love NPR, too, but I swear, sometimes they get a story and won't.let.it.go. coughHurricaneKatrinaVictims'Plightcoughcough! I don't want to hear any more about Per-Vez Musharraf or however you spell it.)

Anyway. So far today, that's been my theme. Quiet. Meditation. Nice music and prayer. And I think that's a fitting way to go into the Thanksgiving holiday, especially one that is so often about loud dinner guests who've had too many bourbon-and-Cokes, or the familiar discomfort of having a snarky great-aunt, or just COPING with those we love the best. Heh. Perhaps the least-treasured American Thanksgiving tradition, but tradition all the same. I'll be with my in-laws... and the three bounding dogs and the TV-always-on and the talky talky. It's just us, a small group of five, and I really love my in-laws: It's just not quiet there. (Is Thanksgiving quiet anywhere? I rather doubt it.)

Here's hoping you find your own hushed moment somewhere to give thanks, a full plate of side dishes (which we all know are better than the turkey anyhow), and laughter all the way around the table. Happy Holiday.

Experiment

In an attempt to survive Drought Watch 2007, I have initiated a little test at my household. (Not survive the drought, mind you -- just the drought watch. The guilt of the media blitz. No one's going to survive the drought. See below.)

Hypothesis: A little family of three can go three whole days (until we leave for the water-rich lands of south Georgia) without running the dishwasher at all.

Materials: Paper plates, knives/forks/spoons, etc.

Process: (Don't turn on the dishwasher, Einstein.)

Results: TIME WILL TELL.

Honestly, the whole thing has me so perturbed right now. I'm TIRED of not flushing the goll-darn toilet. AJ told me yesterday, "Mama, your pee-pee doesn't smell very good." THANKS, KID, NEITHER DOES YOURS. I'm TIRED of feeling like I can't shave in the shower (even though it's pretty darn hard at 6 months preggers and I'd be lying if I said I'd do it every day under normal circumstances -- hello, it's PANTS season.) I'm TIRED of driving a dirty car. Of having theh saaaame chalk drawings on the sidewalk that last 4 weeks because there's been NO RAIN (I like variety). Of squirting the tiniest bit of water into a spaghetti sauce pot, then wiping that DIRTY WATER around in an attempt to clean the pot -- all because I feel guilty about doing dishes PROPERLY.

I shouldn't joke but it's feeling like we're headed for third-world country status over here. Meanwhile, the Army Corps of Engineers is required to let, what is it, 28 million gallons? of water flow downstream every DAY to save the stinking mussels in Florida. (Sorry, Florida.) Now I love a good bowl of mussels in cream sauce, don't get me wrong! And I know, endangered species, circle of life, the more that die out, the farther up the chain the endangering will go. But seriously? It's about to already REACH the top of the food chain -- us little ol' humans. We are 20 feet away from crisis, here. I.E., they say no drinking water in 79 days. DISASTER! Y2K all over again! ALARM! ALARM! ALARM!

I'll admit the news is making it worse with their doomsday nonsense, but somehow the urgency does not seem to compute in the brains of the bureaucrats. Anyway, I'm sick of the whole thing. What I love best is that 79 days is approximately 2.5 months... and approximately the time I'll need to deliver a new human, water-consuming child into the world! Awesome! (Note to the governor: If I breastfeed, I will need to reserve at least 64 oz. a day for myself. Thank you.)

I'm torn between wanting to conserve, a la my experiment, and just wanting to live my life and use it all up -- the government morons are the ones who didn't plan this city right, why should *I* suffer for it??

SIGH. At least I have chocolate-chip-pumpkin muffins stored in the freezer. You know, for emergencies.

Taste of winter

Starbucks was packed this morning which tells me everyone wanted a hot drink to accompany them to work. (Mine, alas, was not the Toffee Nut latte I love, because they were out of toffee nut syrup. A combo of almond and hazelnut, however, almost matched. FYI.) I wanted to befriend, or maybe, lick!, everything in there, it was all so yummy -- I walked inside, versus the drive-thru route I usually take, hoping to actually FEEL the chill in the air -- the lime green and red combo they've chosen, the cool packages of "Christmas blend," the cute little coffee-cup-shaped ornaments (I want!)... it was all shiny and cozy and very inviting.

I wore my favorite red wool double-breasted coat, but it doesn't quite fit over my silhouette, so I think I'll have to purchase a maternity coat. I guess it'll be cold-ish until baby's born, and that's 3 full months away -- so, a necessity. I also wore a scarf that I won from this lovely lady way back in March, and I love it.

AJ wore his cousin's poufy ski-type coat, so generously given to us, and looked like a little Michelin man this morning, toddling off to school, hood and all.

It was in the 20s in our corner of the north Georgia suburbs.

Read-ums

I just LOVE being pregnant at the same time as 2 of my favorite bloggers, because sometimes they get it JUST RIGHT and I get to smile knowingly and say, "YEAH."

Please believe me and go read this, and this.

Fun, fun pregnant girl stuff.

ON the other hand of fun pregnant girl stuff: I am having some wicked carpal tunnel pain today, like a "click" in my wrist that won't click. Rrr. I never have carpal tunnel clickiness when I'm not pregnant. Also, I'd like some boiled shrimp and cocktail sauce, please. NOW. Just sayin'.

Eyes, flowers, socks, and more

I have a big fat list of things to do but I am SO procrastinating this morning. LagLiv tagged me and bless her heart! I seriously needed a bit of a distraction, so it's the 7 Things Meme, coming to you live from my cube in Atlanta. Surely I've done this one before, yes? Oh well, who cares.

Also: GoodLord, there are 31 entries in my "memes are awesome" category.

Here's the meme info:
- Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself.
- Tag 7 random people at the end of your post, and include links to their blogs.
- Let each person know that they’ve been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.


1. We'll go with random and not weird, to start with -- I have hazel eyes. I am just about the only person I know with hazel eyes, although my dad used to have them, I think. His have seemed blue to me for ages now; for a time he wore blue contact lenses, and then he had lasik... anyway I can't quite remember the story on his eyes but MINE are unmistakably hazel and one of my favorite things about my own appearance - you know, when I am doing a self-love exercise. :) I secretly hope that baby girl might get hazel eyes, too. AJ's are his daddy's deep gorgeous brown.

2. I just had to get up and go to the ladies room to check my own eyes out, after writing all that. This could be heading toward vanity; now I feel like I ought to confess it. Although I did also have to pee.

3. My favorite flowers are stargazer lilies. I just learned that besides innocence and purity, they are said to represent wealth and prosperity. I therefore think I should display them much more often, to call down these things straight from the heavens or flower gods or whomever.

4. One of my biggest pet peeves is when I'm walking around the house in sock-feet and get them wet. *SHUDDER!!* I have to take off the offending sock IMMEDIATELY because it makes me so mad. LAST night, and this gives me the willies just telling you, I was making dinner and sloshed a bit of... raw chicken juice (ew) onto the floor... and then stepped in it!! Aaaaaaghghghghghghghhgg! So. Grozs. Let us never speak of it again.

5. I am turning into my mother in so many ways. I've found a little pad of what I would call "scratch paper," and the other day I counted four or five different little notes, written on these 4x5-inch papers, crowding my purse. Heh.

6. Want to know some of the random things I'll do at work today? Fill out an expense report, create a project site for my new client, write-up an online survey, (check my blogs), sign up for MyRackspace, and order a 2008 calendar.

7. I can't decide which kind of calendar to get! I've had a big "blotter" for the past few years, but I think I want to go back to the old-style appointment book.... LIKE MOM KEEPS! I think these are the BEST kind of calendars and used them throughout college. I keep my Google calendar on this view, too. Yes, I keep paper and Google calendars. AND a "picture" calendar hangs in the kitchen at home. What? Don't you keep several? I'm always tempted to take the free ones they give out at church, too.

So now to the tagging... Devan! Marie Green! Electric Boogaloo! Majilla! Swistle! MaryB! and.... dang, I just can't think of a 7th (so many of you, I tag all the time!) If you want it, have at it. :)

It's my kindness, preventing me from posting

I know you all have too many NaBloPoMo participants to keep up with, so I'm posting light to keep your blog-surfing time at the appropriate (HA) time limits. (I know I'm behind in reading all these prolific over-achievers.)

I don't know that I'll EVER do NaBloPoMo. I hate feeling like I *need* to post, when I don't feel like I have the juice. I also hate posting, "I'm busy," because WHO ISN'T. Site launches, work trips, house stuff, holidays... blah blah... Shut up, self. Some people have five kids, you think YOU'RE busy?

But dude. I'm pretty much over this last 2 weeks. And the next ones, too, if you want to know the truth. We got some stuff done over the weekend -- dropped stuff off at Goodwill, Most Excellent Husband vacuumed -- but there's still more to do.

Let's change the subject. My MIL has been asking what I want for Christmas, so I've been thinking about that. DH and I find it interesting that we always give MIL ideas -- we feel like it's a courtesy, not greedy, and she asks, after all -- yet she never reciprocates with ideas for her, so we always end up buying her no-thought-required gifts like Yankee Candles. LAME. Anyway, here's what I want:

Some big (well, medium sized) silver hoop earrings.
Some Large or XL comfy pajamas (for the hospital, mainly -I'm vain, I want cute pictures).
Baby registry stuff -- diaper bags and crib bumpers are SO for the mommy! Not the baby!
iTunes, Starbucks, Barnes & Noble, and Target gift cards. Fistfuls of them.

I think it gets harder and harder, as you age, to give these sorts of wish-lists. I mean, yeah, I could always use a nice lotion or necklace, but those don't seem like things you ask your relatives for, do they? They should know about those things -- they're the "default" items. Hostess gifts. And I am just not watching DVDs lately or listening to CDs. (Nor do I get that excited to open either one, anymore.) Maybe *I* am just lame!

Okay, your turn: what wishes will you tell Santa this year?

Tidbits

-- I bought one Disneyworld thing for myself: a tiny pair of 12-dollar, graphite/rhinestone Mickey earrings. The kind without a back, that just hang in your ears. Then Monday? At my Publix? One of them fell out onto the black and white speckled floor. Even the deli counter girl came out to help -- but we searched in vain. SOB!

-- AJ got a Buzz Lightyear "Blaster" toy, and didn't seem much interested in it at first. But since getting it home, we have had shooting contests in the hallway every spare second. He says, "Ready?.. ain?... GO!" I think he's a Space Ranger First Class by now.

-- My manager has started having our Tuesday meetings at a brand-new Target! With a Starbucks inside! This is called Heaven.

-- Toasted cinnamon raisin bread -- or bagels, in my case -- will always remind me of my Grandmother. She used butter, I use Philly, but the warm, sweet smell is just the same.

Scattered, smothered, and covered

Where to begin? I feel like I want to capture every second (well, almost every one) from our trip because parts of it were really, truly magical, just like all those Disney brochures promise. We made sure to tell ourselves it was all about AJ, and that we would just endure the stress of travel and the long lines for rides, because that is what you do. So, to begin:

When we waited in the Atlanta airport and AJ behaved well, never running far from us, not being loud, EATING a CHICKEN SANDWICH (not something I thought was on his "acceptable" menu), I was proud. He wouldn't play on Delta's little plastic play-yard (a husky-style slide and whatnot) because it was pink and purple and he deemed it "girly." His exact phrasing. I was amused.

When we got on the airplane and he was fascinated by all the playthings like a seatbelt -- "How does this work, Mommy?" -- and the button for the overhead reading light (onoffonoffonoffonoff), and the tray table, oh dear, the tray table... I was worried. Thank goodness the clip was a little too hard to turn and he couldn't manage it very well on his own.

When our plane finally found the runway and geared up to GO FAST, his eyes grew wide and he knew something was happening, and he kept saying, "Here we GO, Mama!" louder and louder over the sound of the engines. I was choked up. Take-offs usually make me emotional, the daughter of a pilot, as I imagine my Dad in his own little-boy enthusiasm -- did his work feel like that every time? Here we GO! The RUSH and the WONDER of flight? If so, I'm very proud of him for spending his life doing something that he loved, and happy for him that he had the chance. It also usually makes me think of his brother, who died last year doing the same little-boy-love activity in an antique plane. So I was kind-of a mess there. But AJ kept me laughing. He wanted to tell his Daddy, too, who is NOT as keen on the miracle of flight, and was trying to just close his eyes and endure this rather uncomfortable part of his trip. AJ kept interrupting with, "WE'RE FLYING, DADDY!!" and Daddy, bless him, was all, "I KNOW, SON." I was torn. ;)

When we got to Orlando AJ thought that we'd see Mickey Mouse right away, so it was hard for him to wait a whole shuttle-bus-ride and dinner and nighttime until Saturday morning. But when we finally entered the park (we opted to just do the Magic Kingdom in the one day we had), we saw was MICKEY himself, on a stage, doing what I assume is the opening number every morning, or every Saturday maybe, complete with chorus dancers and Captain Hook and sparkly costumes and a shower of glitter at the final Hurrah!.... I was overjoyed. AJ was in awe -- he was really seeing his favorite friend, live and in person! I will not admit to you exactly how many tears I shed as the characters all convinced us that Dreams Do Come True. Seeing my child so excited and knowing what a great vision Walt Disney had, wanting kids to just be happy and play, and experience the whole of childhood in such grand fashion, just got to me. Maybe I was also a little nostalgic. Let's just say I needed a Kleenex or five. What a way to start the day.

The weather proved perfect (high 70s but cooler in the morning and the shade), the crowds were manageable, and the rides were fun. We found Peter Pan's ride, the PhilHarmagic 3D show, the Buzz Lightyear Ranger Spin, the Jungle Safari, and of course, It's a Small World. Dad and DH and I rode Pirates of the Caribbean while AJ napped late in the afternoon, in his stroller. We shopped and snacked using our meal plan from the Disney resort deal. It was all awesome.

The main event was seeing Mickey in the "Judges' Tent," which turned out to be very special for all of us. That's the first photo from yesterday. We went back there not knowing what to expect; in fact, several of us grown-ups intended to scoot out and skip it, but I'm so glad we stayed in the short line. A cast member took us back to a door and opened it, and there, in a small interior room, was MICKEY HIMSELF. Ready to greet everyone but only taking a few in at a time. It seemed like a private audience with the Pope or something. There was a reverence and excitement in the air -- this was IT. Our turn with the very most important guy in this particular world. :) AJ was appropriately quiet, but hugged Mickey eagerly, and I was floored. Speechless.

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There's a bit more to tell -- of course we had a character breakfast the next morning and then a long day of waiting/traveling to get home, but every moment was worth it. The smiles that graced us were welcome and yes, maybe it's a materialistic place filled with chumps who'll pay out the nose, but there is Something there, too.

It's palpable, and I'm grateful. It sounds so hokey, really, but you just get swept up in all that magic. I never knew this about Disneyworld before having kids.

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(I'm "scattered and smothered" like Waffle House has browns because of work -- trying to focus back in. I'm trying REAL hard not to dread the Thursday-Friday trip this week, and to feel proud of my skills set, since the company trusts me to make presentations and meet with university deans and presidents and such. After Friday, I hope to feel relief and pride on a job well done. We'll see.)

Two pictures are worth...

I have so much to say about our trip, but no time to say it! This will have to do for now.

Can't blog - working! (And giving a rip!)

Y'all, there is so much going on this week already -- I've already whined about it here -- and then God drops a surprise cool freelance assignment on me, for which I am so darn excited, probably unnecessarily so, that I was awake half the night jotting down ideas in the dark on a little notepad I keep by my bed. I'm even slightly juiced about an office business trip since my friend gets to come with me and I'll stay in a hotel with a king-sized bed all to myself!

So I won't be blogging as much for a few days because we moved a dresser from AJ's new room into mine so I've got drawers to fill and decor to create, I'm planning my business trip, I'm contacting some interviewees, I've still got to attend to my little Mickey Mouse tonight and the neighborhood boglins -- oops, I mean, goblins, but what a cool typo -- and then pack for The Happiest Place On Earth.

I will catch you on the flip side!

I am grateful for:
-- Dinner at Taco Mac last night
-- Ideas flowing freely, for once
-- Yellow spray-painted socks that actually look like Mickey's shoes, and the fact that my husband did the painting
-- Working at home a half-day today
-- Reese's Peanut Butter Cups :)

Olfactory

I'm sitting here enjoying the smell of burning dust -- we turned our heat on tonight. I love this annual ritual. I think, in fact, it should be a family tradition: Turn on the heat that first cold night you just know you can can't sleep through anymore, and everyone sit on the bed, or around the table with hot chocolate, and BREATHE IT IN. That dust smell makes me smile every year. Somehow the dust here in Georgia smells exactly like the dust from Texas, where I was a child. How IS that? There are two different heating systems involved, and very different vegetation and bugs, and even different PEOPLE living here than there, creating all those dusty particles of dog and skin and leaves and taco night and sweat and laundry detergent, and whatever other floaty goodness we've entertained ourselves with all summer. How is it they smell the same??

Who needs pumpkin patch photos

(Actually, I'm ashamed that we didn't take our camera to last week's pumpkin-carving party, and I totally bought this year's pumpkins at Publix. Lame.) But onward!

He'll gladly gather up all the dog toys out of friendship, but not return his own to the neatly specified toy baskets. What's with that?

Do you know my hubby does dishes for me nearly every night? Even on Book Club night, when I was being loud and giggly with the girls, he was in the kitchen scrubbing away. It really struck me as so kind, especially because all my friends witnessed it.

"I call this game fun in a box," said the Cat.

We're off to Helen, GA tomorrow morning, and lots to do to prepare for that and the subsequent events next week. I signed up for cupcakes on Halloween Wednesday at daycare.... WHY? Because I love an extra scoop of stress. Thank goodness for Publix bakery. Have a great weekend!

Six Items of Pregnancy Business

-- My hair is a cross between this chick, and Mrs. Brady. I don't know why I always let it grow out so much in between haircuts. I'm normally a person with thick hair that grows fast -- put me on extra hormones and my head feels like an 8-pound package of alfalfa sprouts or something. I've been avoiding my eyebrows and was mortified when the Book club started sharing funny stories about waxing last night. (Do I need to? OMG, are they hinting?) I must remedy these things Today.

-- This morning I wanted to eat eggs, and I swear I couldn't shake enough black pepper on them to satisfy me. Every bite, I peppered a little more.

-- I get the weirdest sharp-pain ligament-stretching sensations. Not all the time, just once in a blue moon one will catch me off-guard and make me say, out loud, "Oh!" Embarrassing when it happens within the cube farm.

-- Had my first middle-of-the-night, I might as well get up and go downstairs moment of insomnia. I ate 3 big pieces of French bread (starved), got under the blanket on the couch, and watched M*A*S*H for about 45 minutes.

-- Also have had my first supposed "man" dreams, which I never had with AJ. You know, where you dream about some hot man other than your husband? Lots of people I know talk about this but again, I never had one when pregnant with AJ. I would like to request a do-over, though: One dream was about a NON-hot guy I knew in college, the other was about Scott Baio. Seriously. He worked in this yellow deli next door to an apartment building where I apparently lived. I got all flirty. Scott Baio??

-- Last night before bed, this little girl went on a kicking spree. It was the Olympics of kicking. She must have been on her back, propping her neck up, wearing a sweatband and doing bicycles. I am constantly lifting up my shirt so I can WATCH the movements from the outside. (When we're alone, I mean, not in public!)

A rapper I can get behind

First it was Shreveport, then my own Atlanta tried to pass fashion police laws about this annoying little trend in young males. (And females, heck... remind me to tell you about the teenage g-string we saw last weekend at the local ice cream shop! Or don't, eww.)

Today -- and I heard this on NPR -- it's south Dallas, where the deputy mayor wants to do something about the kids' britches. But he's going about it the right way: He has help from someone they may listen to.


I truly don't listen to hip-hop, but I think the song is brilliant. It makes me laugh -- sounds like he's talking to a bunch of 4-year-olds. It doesn't seem quite right to pass a LAW about how people dress (there are already indecent exposure laws, why waste time and taxpayer money? Besides that, I think there may be more important crimes to be prosecuted. Maybe.) But taking it to the streets? Excellent idea.

Seriously, the words of the song. SO Funny. You can listen to the whole thing by clicking in the sidebar here.

*loud applause*

Supposedly No One Cares, but...

I had the BEST, YUMMIEST lunch today and it is still making me happy an hour later. I ate, at Jason's Deli, a big bowl of the Chicken & Sausage Gumbo, and served myself from their "famous" salad bar. Field greens, yellow bell peppers, cucumbers, cherry tomatoes, green olives, cheddar, and croutons, with a drizzle of balsamic vinagrette and another drizzle (superfluous!) of Bleu Cheese. And two pickled okra spears on the side! And a respectable little serving of potato salad!

I licked the platters clean. I don't quite understand why this experience has me in such a good mood. We've taken to joking, "My baby is happy" when we've had a good meal lately -- AJ, of course, says this of the baby in HIS tummy, too. Well, y'all, MY BABY IS HAPPY.

I can't: think of anything to say

i am: glad to have a day to work from home because we bathed Polie over the weekend and there is Dog. Hair. Everywhere.
i think: it is supposed to rain 3 days in a row this week (hooray!)
i know: we need it.
i have: a lot of things on the to-do list, including Book Club on Wednesday at my house. See "i am," above.
i hate: having feelings of dread about my office job, but sometimes I do.
i don’t: believe young mothers should have to travel for work, no matter how much a part of their job description it is, when there are perfectly capable SINGLE PEOPLE who can travel.
i can’t: think of anything to write for an "edgy" guest blog post at WorkIt, Mom.
i can: say I've successfully checked three things off my list already.
i will: RSVP (regrets) for a bridal shower and a Halloween party today.
i won’t: feel bad about regretting; I've got enough going on.
i forget: dumb things, like when I went to Publix yesterday and didn't get anything I'll need for the Book Club menu (2 different soups, fresh hearty bread, and a dessert).
i miss: having lots of free time to spend hanging out with my husband...
i fear: that it will only get worse come February.
i feel: mostly better -- my hacking cough is down to almost nothing.
i hear: good things about the Bumbo; do I need one?
i smell: Fresh Linen by Carpet Fresh. I sprinkled it on so now I HAVE to vacuum, once my neighbor, Mrs. Bumstead, returns our vacuum.
i crave: the chocolate Frosted Pop Tart in my pantry, just 3 feet away.
i wonder: How long I will resist?
i regret: that I let other peoples' bad moods define my own sometimes.
i love: my little family and our plain-jane weekends
i dream: of Jeanie.
i long: for a stretch of about 3 weeks off, just to get STUFF done. Also for a pedicure.
i care: entirely too much about how my house appears (outdated, not decorated) to some of my Book Club buddies
i always: try to shut this care up and just be a gracious hostess.
i am not: proud of it.
i believe: in Hope.
i smile: when AJ does his dance moves.
i laugh: (ed) when he asked me this weekend, "But why can't I have ALL the Skittles, Mama?"
i collect: dog hair, apparently, and I display it around my home.
i play: Triple-Berry Pies with my son, using a frisbee for a pie-plate and the top of an empty propane tank for an "oven." It's kind-of like mud-pies. Maybe you have to be there.
i write: poorly with a pen and have always disliked my handwriting.
i await: 2008
i cook: well enough that my husband, I think, is grateful, but I also cook: a lot of the same things.
i trust: that things will work out for the best in most situations.
i intend: to try, this week, to smile and be productive.
i search: for meaning in all the most ridiculous small places.
i look: like I could use a serious haircut. (Even AJ is telling me so, since he got HIS haircut last week.)
i shout: obscenities when I stub my toe.
i whisper: "I love you just the way you are," while AJ is sleeping.
i conquer: week after week, I guess.
i listen: to my mother.
i ignore: most of my desires for frivolous spending. Like, right now I really want new bathmats for every bathroom in my house. But do I buy them? Nooooo. Don't "need" 'em. This irritates me to no end.
i live: a very comfortable life, full of riches and happiness.