Band, band, band, band BAND!

I couldn't focus yesterday, and don't seem able to today either, and the reason is BAND. Alex has joined the marching band, and I am both excited and slightly terrified.

Emotion number 1: Excited. This was Alex's idea -- he came to me, I didn't push. And I'm so glad for that. I was content this year (or maybe resigned is a better word), for him to be in concert band only, and not march. Even for next year, if that's what he had decided. He's learned so much during his year of concert band! It's so refined to play onstage like a symphony orchestra! It costs so much less money. It's great! (I'm jealous, even, because I've never played in an instrument ensemble, and although chorus is similar I'd love to experience the instrumental side of it.)

I completely understand why he didn't march this year as a brand-newbie to the school, and why he's been hesitant about it: So Much Commitment. Every Friday. Practice after school 3 times a week. Hot, polyester black (sun-absorbing) uniforms in the Georgia heat. No time for any "life" other than band. 

BUT. His friends from concert band/lunch table encouraged him. The directors of the marching band encouraged him (!! #proudmama). And he can handle the commitment. He is a smart kid who's good at time management. We will help him. And more than anything, I want him to make close friends and memories. High school can be a social upswing, and marching band is a perfect avenue for it.

Emotion number 2: A little bit terrified! The parental commitment is as big, if not bigger, than the student commitment. First of all, there are fees and fundraising and more fees, and then the incidentals like stopping at McDonald's on the way to and from games or competitions, and new water bottles and new instruments someday.... and hoo, boy. 

But more than that, the TIME required of parents is insane, and in very short supply already. They have more volunteer positions for the band than our elementary school has for every activity together. You can be an equipment manager, a bus chaperone, a t-shirt-selling cashier during games or practices, a meal-provider before home games, a launderer and seamstress for uniforms, a planner of banquets, a concession-stand person or a director of the huge color guard competition that our school hosts. OMG, there is a lot. I know it will include Shawn and me developing lifelong friendships with other parents, and I want that for sure... but I'm unsure how we will fit it all into the calendar! (The laundry option does seem like one of the easier volunteer positions, and I was kind-of interested in it, except when I thought about 150 kids' stinky, sweaty clothing and towels being in my car every week. No, thank you, not at all interested.)

It will be fun. I'm really excited, despite my misgivings, and as a result I've been reading the 60-page Handbook and studying the Band Boosters' website instead of focusing on work. ;) I envision we'll have to change our family dinnertime schedule this fall, because practice is until 7:15 three nights a week (8:00 dinner like the Europeans?) and then games on Fridays. It solves one of my summer dilemmas: What will Alex do with his time? Hahaha. Band camp is nearly 2 weeks in July. (How I will occupy Kate those 2 weeks is another question.)

Here we go, though! Let the madness begin!

Helpful ;)

I have to tell a small, funny tale about Alex. He is SUCH a helpful kid, always willing to do whatever we ask him to do -- which frequently means he's tasked with taking meat out of the freezer in the morning, because he's last to leave home on school days, and I always forget to do it myself.

Yesterday I texted him and said, "There's some chicken in freezer, cut into chunks in a Ziploc -- can u put it in the fridge pls?"

"Yeah"

"Thank you xoxo"

"No prob"

And I didn't think another thing about it. I was planning to make these pretzel-coated chicken nuggets, because I find myself with a ton of pretzels* and no one in my house actually LIKES pretzels.

Imagine my surprise when I got home, and found a Ziploc bag of raspberries in the fridge, and my chicken still solid as a rock in the freezer!

He said he just grabbed the closest Ziploc he could find, and "they looked like they were in chunks, so I assumed it was the right one!"

... We had leftover Easter pork tenderloin, instead. ;)

Raspberries.


Our Easter Sunday dinner was so fun. The neighbors came over, and offered to bring both mashed potatoes and a fruit tray with "fluffy dip" (cream cheese and whipped cream and sugar, YUM). Those contributions reduced my stress level significantly, and it was an otherwise easy meal for me to arrange and prepare:

Cheese and crackers for a small hors d'oeuvre (I forgot to slice the summer sausage)
Pork Tenderloin
Sweet and Sour Green Beans (made the day before)
Bacon-Jalepeno Deviled Eggs (made the day before)
Heat and serve rolls
Peach mimosas (Simply Peach + Stella Rosa Peach)
Strawberry lemonade for the kids
3-ingredient Lemon Cake, which Kate and their daughter, A., decorated with sprinkles in the shape of a cross, so smart and sweet!

They came over at 3:00, we ate ate 3:30, and sadly they had to leave by 5:30 because Mr. Neighbor had to go to the airport for a month-long business trip (military). BUT! This was actually good, because I wouldn't have known what to do if they'd stayed and stayed. Get out the Uno cards? Watch a movie? Sit and talk (for 4 hours??) They kept apologizing but it was a huge relief. We cleaned up, then we did watch a movie slash snooze, and then had more cake for "dinner" around 8:00. Perfect holiday, IMO.

Other dinners planned for this week:
(M - Penne pasta casserole with ground turkey and sausage, red sauce and mozzarella)
W - Pretzel chicken nuggets! Pasta salad with veggies
Th - Oven Chicken Fajitas
F - Pizza, lovingly picked up on the way home from work

I'm at work today with a TON of new tasks, so I'd better get to it.

But here we are on Sunday (I do not care for this photo of me - for one thing, it doesn't show the prettiest part of the dress, which is the bright orange hem and sleeve cuffs):

*So many pretzels because Pinterest encouraged me to make these for Easter. They weren't even a Pinterest-Fail! Aren't they the cutest? I always buy pastel M&Ms anyway, so it was fun, and helped me occupy Kate while she was out of school. Girl always needs a crafty project!

Let's Go Out for Drinks

You guys, I SO do not want to do my work today. Good thing it's "fake Friday." Two days off for Easter, hooray! So instead of work let me tell you what I did FUN last night: I went OUT. After choir practice ended at 9:00pm. To a Taphouse.

!!

So rare are the occasions of me going out for beer after an event, that I can't even think of the last time it happened. College, probably. I'm not much of a beer-drinker. In my 20s I drank beer, because pitchers were the easiest and cost-effective option at Manuel's Tavern and at Melton's App & Tap, two places my friends and I frequented in those days.

But then I guess I grew up and started drinking wine instead. Beer had too many calories, back when we counted calories. Lately we barely even drink wine. If I open a bottle for one glass on a Friday night, the bottle sits, corked, for at least a week on my counter, sadly not being drunk (drinken, as Kate still says). Not for lack of wanting to, just lack of time, really. During dinner at home, there's no guarantee that I don't have to go out in the car again for some activity. And when I get home from said activity, when it would be nice to sit down in front of TV with a glass, it's already bedtime (9:00 pm! We are so old). Bah. I know I'm not really missing anything.

ANYWAY. Last night was the 60th birthday of my friend who does not look 60, so her husband texted me early in the week with this: "Drinks after choir for bday." I didn't know he had my number, and wasn't certain whose bday, but figured it out fairly quickly and decided I would join them. Turned out to be a great (small, thankfully) group of people I genuinely like and yet rarely spend time with, outside of choir. I would love for Shawn and me to go out drinking with them again. (We have been, one other time, when we were all invited to a wedding and pre-partied.) Also, I need to have Chris and Lisa over to dinner sometime, because apparently that is a thing I think I need to do to express "I like you." They're great.

It gave me one little glimpse into the future, and I said, "Sometimes I can't wait for the kids to be all grown up so we can do what we WANT again." Immediately I wished I could take it back, nearly slapped my hand over my mouth, because I know, I KNOW that we will be so sad the day they're all grown up and gone. (Unless they come out drinking with us!) Chris said it takes about 6 minutes to get over it. HA! But I know that statement is also false. Life is funny, isn't it? And Time Marches On: This week, we went to our first end-of-year Band Banquet for the high school. END OF year. Alex's first year of high school just began, and is nearly over. He walked away from the 3 of us quickly after we walked into the banquet, off to sit with his lunch-table friends. Praise Jesus.

Sooner than I think, he'll be the one going out for beers with his friends, heaven help me.


P.S. I had one glass of Atlanta Hard Cider and a taste of a friend's Lord Grey Sour Ale, and they were both delicious. So head's up, DH: We will be visiting this Taphouse again, probably while the kids are at camp in 7 short weeks.

Scatterbrained, therefore, bullet-points

• We had a delightful week off -- did the museum and the outlets and lots of family time -- and today I don't feel like doing any work. I feel a little scatterbrained, actually. Can't seem to keep upcoming dates straight. This morning before I left for work, I had to return upstairs to retrieve forgotten things not once, but twice. And I can't decide which job tasks are priority on this Tuesday, which makes me feel very loosey-goosey and not anchored by any deadline. This is a good thing, but it's also a challenge.
• I'm dealing with watery eyes nearly every morning lately, until about 8:30. What gives?! Following in my father's footsteps, I guess, because he's dealt with watery eyes for about a decade now. He even had surgery to fix what the doctor said were blocked tear ducts causing the watery-ness, but it didn't help. Poor Dad. And poor me! It is SUPER annoying. I don't even think it's allergies, but it might be.
• We seem to be in somewhat of a "lean" season, money-wise, right now. Nothing stressful, and we do have savings, but the bank balance just feels low. We're not big spenders, although we had a little spree at the outlet mall over Spring Break -- get this: I got 4 items at the Vera Bradley outlet for less than $100! FOUR things! They were having a 60% off, + 20% off sale. Eighty percent! It was amazing and I have a new purse to show for it. ;) -- anyway, it's a bit of a bummer to feel even the slightest pinch. We owed federal taxes, the tax accountant also costs a pretty penny (worth it), and summer camp ain't cheap, full balance due May 1. The kids are growing (hooray!) and need summer clothes and shoes and Kate needs new uniforms next year for middle school. Plus, I grocery shopped last Wednesday and it already feels like the cupboards are bare, but I'd like to NOT grocery shop again until the weekend. We're FINE, fine fine fine fine, nothing at all to see here, but then I was also thinking that possibly in a year, we'll need to add another small car payment to our monthly budget, and more gasoline and insurance when Alex starts to drive. Ack. One of his buddies turned 15 over the weekend and his parents already bought him a car. Fifteen. Hasn't even taken the written test for the permit. Hello, extravagance. Comparing yourself to others is a bad habit but that's what got me thinking. I've paused my Stitch Fix shipments and I think Shawn is cancelling his SiriusXM subscription. There are certainly other things we could cut if necessary, and it's good to be reminded to take care, to appreciate our usual comfortable (though not excessive) financial padding.
• For Q2 and April, I have decided to focus on home-caring and gardening. I've been obsessed with "yard of the month" pictures lately. Obsessed! Hee hee. Our neighborhood doesn't do YOTM, but Google does! I love when the homeowners stand with their YOTM sign. So cute. Last year my front yard gardening was a complete and total bust; the hanging plants I bought from a school fundraiser died within 2 weeks, I chose Dusty Miller even though I should have known better (I HATE how it gets so leggy), and whatever flowers I chose (marigolds, maybe? Or begonias?) didn't survive my black thumb or the heat. Hope springs eternal, though, and I can only improve over that. I'm spending the time I'd normally be on social media studying garden tips and ideas. Indoors, we want to paint 1) Alex's bedroom, 2) the den and kitchen, and 3) our bedroom/bath. What we REALLY need to paint is our entry/hallway, but we'll have to hire someone for that because it's two stories. And then I'll want new throw pillows and artwork and and and... watch out, checkbook. Sigh.
• Some meals from this week's menu: 
• Crock-pot BBQ pork on slider buns (delicious) with veggies/dip
• Bacon-Ranch Spaghetti and garlic toast (carb heavy but yummy)
• Chili over rice
• Maple-glazed salmon with wild rice and broccoli (meat-free Fridays, such a Lenten sacrifice)

Spring Break Ahead

We're in countdown mode, 3 more days until Spring Break. I have taken the whole week off with the kids, Shawn has taken off 3 days, and Shan (my manager) will also be off the entire week, so it really feels like a full-stop vacation. We're headed to Florida like most of Cobb county, so we'll see everyone on I-85 south, I guess. Pensacola is an atypical stopping place, however; most cars will have to go over the bridges or further south to the beaches, but not ours. I'm so looking forward to being at Mom and Dad's house for a few days.

The Cousins will be in school, unfortunately. But I'm hoping for some outdoor playtime with them on Sunday. After that, I suppose it will be up to us to entertain our kids somewhat. Ideas so far include:

• A trip to Destin, to the outlet mall there (Kate is FOR and this is the only thing we've promised)
• A visit to Pensacola Beach, maybe (I do think it's supposed to be cloudy and not warm enough for swimming, though my kids might disagree)
• Blue Angels practice on Tuesday morning at 11:30 (FREE, but will it be crowded? Possibly, and it's always a little scary (in my mind) to drive onto the Navy base)
• Historic Downtown; Dad particularly wants to take the kids to the main museum, but I always thought it was boring. The only memorable thing to see in that museum is a petrified cat. I also worry about my Dad walking so much. On the other hand, downtown has been restored quite a bit since I was there, and I know there are some fun restaurants we've never tried.
• UWF trails. The university has a well known, woodsy walking trail and it might be the right time of year to be outside in Florida (i.e., not too hot). Plus, I want to plant the idea of touring around college campuses in Alex's head, since that time of our lives is fast approaching! 
• A movie. There's always a Marvel movie playing that some of us want to see. 

I'm not trying to cause stress during a week off, but I do want us to do some interesting things and not just sit around, for the kids' sake (sitting around would be luxurious and welcome for us adults... or at least for me). 

Until then, it's a typical work week. At my work, "typical" means we've had 3 new people start jobs, including a new General Mgr. for the U.S. — and 2 fairly significant people resign. It's always fun here. Meanwhile, I've just celebrated my TENTH anniversary. HAHA! I must be doing something wrong. Truly, I've asked myself, "Why, with all the nonsense, am I never motivated enough to leave?" I'm sure I could be paid more, elsewhere, and I've certainly had my moments of utter defeat, where I've firmly resolved to get out.... and then not gone. I guess the pros still outweigh the cons: Okay pay, flexibility when I need it (though not too much), location location location, and now, gosh, I'm invested. Might as well stay. At this point I'd like to see the company's return to Success, since I've been through its Hard Times.

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What are we eating this week? Some good stuff, actually: 

Sunday: out. We went to Taco Mac and watched the end of the Duke/UCF basketball game which was spectacular fun (if you like Duke)

M - Breaded chicken breasts, mashed potatoes and steamed broccoli

T - Homemade sloppy joe's, salad and fries

W - Rigatoni and meatballs, although I'm not making any of it from scratch. I do, however, have some parsley which I will sprinkle over the top to make it look fancy. ;)

Th - Baked potatoes with the rest of the sloppy joe's meat sauce, if desired, or cheese/bacon/sour cream like normal people.

Because we're going out of town, Friday is a "clean out the fridge" meal or cereal, woo hoo!

Always Grateful for a Slow-Start Monday

9:50 a.m. and I just got settled at my desk, after working from home this morning because Kate has a day off from school. She slept until 8:00. So lovely, a child getting extra zzzz's and waking up fuzzy headed and sleepy. Awww. Her friend's mom, of the stay-at-home persuasion, offered to a couple of us working-persuasions to take in our girls today -- how sweet. She's always available for weekday play dates and I'm so thankful for her. And for a slow start, myself, so she wouldn't have extra kids in her house before 9:00: Coffee and a cooked breakfast at home, email checking, clearing up dishes and other little chores. Ahhhh, so nice. I wish every day could start like that.

I narrowly missed getting stuck behind an accident this morning after dropping Kate off, so the bliss was short-lived. A lady in the left lane merged right without even looking, and hit a car in that lane. I was in the far-right (three lanes total) and juuuuust skated by. If I'd been 1 minute behind I'd have had to stop and wait. Eeek. I hate driving. 

Today on the docket are two main tasks: Write up a Talking Points document for our sales team, and edit 2 or 3 articles. Not too demanding, which is perfect for a Monday. My new-ish role -- I'm now solely focused on U.S. marketing, with yet another title, did I tell you? Marketing Communications Specialist, whatever that means (but it's better than Marketing Coordinator, which made me angry 6 months ago when it was given to me; honestly, a person working as long as I have has earned the right NOT to be called a "coordinator") -- anyway, my new-ish role means new responsibilities, many of them recurring tasks. I'm now charged with: 

• Monitoring several of our accounts online (social media, mostly), and reporting on who's doing what (Spy duties! haha!)
• Scanning U.S. healthcare news and adding it to a content calendar
• Boosting social posts and/or creating campaigns
• Maintaining B2B content, which hasn't been updated in at least 2 years

I don't know yet if it's better or worse than what I was doing, but it's slightly different enough that I feel a tiny energetic lift from it, especially here at the beginning, while I get used to the new routine. 

After work, it's at-home yoga and then dinner. I planned a menu this week! It feels monumental after the last several of phoning it in (or going out of town and making Shawn do it). 

Last night, Sunday: Dinner Salads. Alex doesn't eat salad; however, he is away on Sunday nights for church youth group, and he eats there. So last night Kate and I cut lettuce, tomato, cucumber, carrots, and added shredded cheddar to a big salad bowl. We offered leftover taco meat with salsa, or cubed ham with hard-boiled egg, your choice of dressing and tortilla chips or croutons. I thought it was perfect and wish I could serve dinner salads once a week, both for ease and for health.

Monday, today: Oven Chicken Fajitas and yellow rice. I'm so excited about this. I hope the kids will eat them. I won't add the cayenne pepper but we have a giant jar of pickled jalapenos with which to make ours spicier. >>UPDATE: Everyone liked this! Even Alex! He even dared to eat a piece of onion and a bell pepper strip! Woo!

T: The ever-popular smoked sausage, mac and cheese, and green beans simple dinner. 

W: Don't kill me, Shawn, but it's make your own pizza night. I have had the prepared crusts in the fridge for a while and it's time to use them. 

Th: Chicken Picante (yes, chicken two times - we had pork the last 2 weeks in a row), black beans and corn. I used to make this all the time and got really sick of it after a while. The timing was fine because the kids wouldn't eat salsa in those days, anyway; but now I think they might be open to trying it. I bought mild salsa of course, and we'll see how it goes. I predict they'll scrape it off, for the most part, but I also know Shawn loves this dish.  UPDATE: Kate gave it 2 thumbs enthusiastically up, and Alex gave it a "so-so" teetering hand but said he would eat again. LOL these two.

F: Leaving it open for whatever. Our church also does a Friday fish fry during Lent, and that might be something we attempt this week. Kate mentioned wanting to go. 

In the beginning of March, I thought it would be fun to actually MAKE a dessert one night a week, and I set it as a monthly goal in my planner. It hasn't yet happened, but maybe I will whip up a box of brownies at some point. I like the idea of it -- normally I don't make desserts, we just eat ice cream or cookies if we have them. But I feel like making and presenting a dessert would make me feel good, and would be more festive. Plus, I'm on a mission to get my family interested in pie. (WHO doesn't like pie?? My family.) Brownies aren't pie, but they're a start. 

My Social Media fast

For Lent this year I decided to go big or go home, and I gave up Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Except for work purposes. ("And maybe a little on Sundays, heh" as I wrote in my farewell post.)

I had found myself clicking on it SO frequently, and SO mindlessly; not just on my phone during downtime, but also anytime I finished a task at my work computer. Or many times when I hadn't finished the task, but the task was uninteresting. Sometimes I would do that thing where, I would close out the app, having learned there was nothing new to see or read, only to go back and re-open it 10 minutes later! WHY!? Dopamine, I guess. Addiction. It was time to quit.

I see this same behavior in my kids, particularly Alex, and it upsets me. I was naively hoping he/they would take my cue and give up social media as well, but that didn't happen. (They both gave up soda.) Still, perhaps they'll learn by osmosis.

It has not been easy. I'm grateful that on Day 2 of the experiment, I left town for a business trip. I had a book with me because of traveling, which I think helped. Actually that's one thing I'm hoping to get out of it -- more time spent reading actual books. 

I'm still reading news online, and therefore seeing some of the trending stories. Yesterday I checked FB for just a minute because one of my closest friends had posted "after a long time," (I got an email, thanks, FB) -- turned out it was a birthday photo of her now-15-year-old, and I'm glad I got to see it, but I was careful NOT to continue scrolling after that.

Anyway, I'll keep you posted. 

Blogging doesn't count as social media, in this instance. Because I said so. ;)

I went to a writing workshop at the work conference (for reference, it was a conference for young breast cancer survivors and my company was exhibiting). I thought a lot about being "a writer." About whether or not I am. (I am.) We were given a prompt, and here's what came out:

"...what I really want to say is -- my gosh, we are all feeling humans. It's interesting that you can put 30 women in a room with paper and pen, and they will WRITE. So many words! We all have all this STUFF inside that wants to be seen -- not heard, but SEEN in letters and curliques of punctuation. We write like our lives depend on it, when given the chance! The time. The quiet. We write to... continue. One day to the next. One paragraph on top of another. Poor penmanship and all, it pours, or drips, out of us. Think of the number of diary pages I have seen. God bless the pen, who takes all of our feelings direct from "where" -- deep inside -- to here, right in front of our eyes."

Yes, I can do that for you! All About Sleepovers

I don't claim to be an expert about sleepovers... not by a long shot! But I guess I have learned a few things that make hosting them easier, and I can certainly share those here.

I think Alex was six when he went on his first overnight sleepover, to our next-door neighbors' house. That was one way to make it infinitely easier -- having it next door! On the side of letting them go to a friend's, here are my rules:

1. I must receive an invitation (text message) from the parent. None of this, "Jimmy invited me to spend the night Friday. His mom said." And no, I'm not going to text his mom. That's inviting yourself over, and is impolite. Tell Jimmy his mom needs to get in touch with me.

2. You can pack your own small bag. (I let them take whatever they want, and just ask at the end to make sure they've got pajamas, toothbrush/toothpaste, a change of clothes and clean underwear.)

3. There should be a confirmed pick-up time, and if you've spent the night at a friend's, I will pick you up. (Unless the parent offers, I don't expect them to host my kid and also drive my kid home. Sometimes they offer and that's great! But if not, my kid = my responsibility.)

When I'm hosting, here's what I usually do:

1. I think it's best to do sleepovers on a Friday, because they'll be tired from school. Brilliant, right? Wasn't my idea, but I have used it with pretty consistent success. For example, Kate and her friend went to bed at 10:00 pm with no prompting from me last Friday. Actually said, "We're tired, we're going to sleep." Mwuah-ha-ha, success. I think when she was younger I usually attempted to get them to bed (ish) by 9:30, knowing they would stay up talking -- because come on, it's a sleepover, staying up late is part of the fun! However, if they're up past MY bedtime, or generally not being quiet, I have never been afraid to tell them to settle down and go to sleep.

2. Dinner: Order pizza. It's fun and it's easier. Now sometimes, if it's my kid's birthday for instance, I'll make his/her favorite meal, and I've never had a guest turn their nose up at spaghetti or chili, although I'm always nervous that will happen. I always ask the guest if they'll eat whatever I'm planning to serve. My advice is to keep it simple, though; save your spicy Thai shrimp dinner that your kids will eat for another night. (On the flip side, my kids have tried a few things away at others' homes that they never would have tried at our table: different fruits, Vietnamese food at the Vietnamese kid's house, etc., so it's up to you.)

3. YES to snacks. Not too many and not all night long, but popcorn is always a treat if they watch a movie (we don't make it often), or maybe buy a type of dessert you don't normally buy, or something fun like that.

4. Let them sleep in the guest room. Or, on the floor in the living room if you don't have a guest room. This has always been a big hit at our house because there's a TV in the guest room, but not in the kids' rooms. I don't mind; keeps them out of my hair!

5. Depending on the kid visiting, the great thing about having a friend over is that they usually occupy themselves so that DH and I can have some time to ourselves. Or.... that is the theory. More often than I would like, I get a surprising, "We're bored."  ....?!? I never know what to do with that. It is not my job to entertain them, though. Usually I throw out "board games?" "Wii Sports?" "Scavenger Hunt? (meaning, they create it for each other and then do the hunting -- just kidding, I've never been smart enough to suggest this. But I wish I had!)" "Watch a movie?" and see if that solves it. Once or twice with girls, I have stupidly suggested we paint nails. DO NOT DO this. It takes forever, and they don't sit still long enough for it to dry, but if you don't help, you will surely have nail polish all over the bathroom floor. The last several years, "making slime" has become THE sleepover activity. Ugh. But at least they do it without me, being "experts." I do try to limit the time they spend on the iPad as much as I can.

6. Breakfast -- I nearly always make cinnamon rolls from a can, or an easy muffin mix. Pancakes on a rare occasion but truly, I'm in it for EASY. I try to have fruit available as well, so they'll tell their parents they had something healthy besides popcorn and pizza, lol! Sometimes I'll take kids to get doughnuts, but not very often.

7. Don't make the experience last too long. Morning, or just after lunch, is a good time to say the sleepover ends. What I've found is that, even very bestest of friends get sick of each other after 24 hours -- that is really too long.

That's all I can think of at the moment. Hope it helps, S! :)

News and Tidbits

Another weekend, another sleepover.

I try not to say no to those, because I have such happy memories from sleepovers when I was young. My favorite ones were when both Jill and I went to the McWhorters' house, or to our cousins' house, each also having a set of sisters. But I also loved spending the night at Melissa's house, Nikki's house, and Marybeth's in high school. 

This weekend it's a girl from Kate's basketball team who has never been over before, but is very sweet from what I can tell. So yay! Except that: 

• Friday at their school is a half-day (monthly faculty meeting), so they'll have to come to my office or else I'll have to beg another WFH afternoon. My boss has been consistently kind about those lately, but it always makes me nervous to ask, again
• my solitary Saturday-morning coffee time will likely be interrupted. Not huge in the grand scheme of things (maybe I'll just get up earlier?), but it is a kind-of ritual that helps me feel like myself
• and finally, the weather is supposed to be bad this weekend so they'll be stuck in the house with no basement and thus, not very far to go to entertain themselves. 

Now that the complaints are lodged, I should say that I'm happy about it, happy she has friends (and last week it was Alex's turn, so it's fair), and I enjoy feeling like "fun Mom" once in a while.

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This morning the United Methodist Church news is on my mind quite a bit, having, as I do, no fewer than 5 Methodist ministers (and many more Methodist friends) in my college friends-list. Emory is a Methodist university and has a well-regarded theology school associated with it, not to mention its "preacher's kid" tuition discount, which brought many a Methodist student into my life. :) Plus, I love the Methodists; sang in their choir as a very small child and went to their pre-school, even. I especially loved when we visited their church some Sunday mornings, and I got to go to Sunday school! Catholic churches didn't have that and it was so cool to me.

Anyway, their #GC2019 news is sad for many congregants, and I feel for them. But the thing it brings home for me, and what I want to tell my dear Methodist friends is that, once again, we've learned that the Church is a human institution, and thus a flawed one. Who runs the Church/churches? Humans.  So, my feeling is, it's never going to be perfect, and simply can't be. I've learned as a Catholic (over and over again, unfortch) that you just have to kind-of shrug your shoulders, appreciate what you learn from the institution, and accept what it is. I mean, in the case of the Catholics, we have to also be very mad and disgusted and feel hopeless sometimes, too, but mostly we have to continue on. We  separate our own personal faith from the deeply-flawed humans who manage the business of faith. I still stay Catholic in spite of it  (probably because I'm lazy). It's home; besides that, it's a tradition rich with meaning and depth. I like that there's always more to study and learn and question. 

I don't agree that you can't be a "cafeteria Catholic," following some rules or believing some things, but not others. Yes, you can. It's flawed, by definition. I have a mind. You do, too. Our thoughts can be as true - and as flawed - as the church leadership's, but they're no less worthy of thinking. There's room for all of us.

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In related news, sort-of, Shawn and I were asked to be godparents! We've never been godparents together before, so this is exciting! Each of us has one other godchild, but now we'll have little Charlie, our next-door neighbors' 8-month-old, and we are so honored to be asked. They had us to dinner and asked in an awkwardly sweet lull in the conversation. We don't know them all that well yet, but I'm so excited to GET to know them better. And be linked in this special way.

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Final newsworthy item, next week I go to Austin for a tradeshow. I'm looking forward to it and hope it helps me feel some new enthusiasm for my company's work. I could use a shot of enthusiasm, heh.

House; and summer panic

One thing that makes me sad about our move back in 2014 is that we couldn't find a house with a finished basement. I mean, one never expects to find ALL of the things that one wants in a house, I know that. But we gave up a lot of our wish-list items because by the time we found our house/neighborhood, we'd seen SO MANY wrong houses already, and ours was under contract and time was ticking.

We had seen a lot of larger houses, with basements... but they all needed a lot of work. Like, old ugly kitchens, plus needing to renovate the basement, plus paint. Or, newish kitchen, but terrible carpet/floors/bathrooms. We're not very good at working on houses, as it turns out. We were wary of buying something that we'd always want to renovate (but never get around to).

So we are grateful for our house and neighborhood, yes. It was move-in ready and in good shape. But 1) a basement/media room (more space in general) and 2) the master or a guest room on the main floor were things we really did want, and still don't have.

Kinda a bummer. I'm not sure why I'm thinking about that today.

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One of the things I think I'm terrible at, is medium-term planning. Long term, we're finally doing okay, although we have some paperwork we owe our financial planner this week. But medium-term, the time it takes to, say, plan a trip -- or plan summer -- is hard. Summer 2019 is looming, and we have a teen and a pre-teen who don't need a babysitter but don't need to be sitting around on YouTube all day long. They're going to their 2-week, no-devices camp in early June. But what else? What will they do after that?

I tell you I am so weary of setting up summers.

One of my church friends is looking for a very part-time, like one day a week for a couple hours a day, babysitter for her grandson. I think Alex would be great at it; he's good with kids. Is he interested? That I don't know. Should he think about getting another, "real" job? He'll be 15, but not until July. Most things I'm reading say you really need to be 15 to be hired, and even then, it's slim pickings. So maybe babysitting is it? And what, pray tell, will I then do with Kate on those days?

I'm considering a request to work from home one day every week during the summer, for a start. Maybe I can find a pool and take the kids one day a week? I just seriously don't know. I can't deal with the thought of them doing NOTHING.

When I started thinking about summer, that got me thinking about driver's ed. Should Alex be taking that this summer? From what I can see online (today), in our county the 30-hour classroom course is only offered in April or May. He won't be 15 yet, so does he take that the following year, before he gets his actual license? But he has to pass a written test for his permit, at 15... panic panic panic I need a book to give him to study in the meantime, I guess, and how in the HOW am I supposed to teach a kid how to drive? What if I don't do it right? What the heck??? My kid is old enough for me to be thinking about this?

Musicals! Revisiting the me of my teens

I finally listened to "Hamilton" about a month ago. I'm about 4 years late, I realize. It is so good. I want to hear every. single. word. when I have it on. It has made me want to revisit all the musicals I used to love, so today I pulled out my London cast recording of CATS. Ha!! An oldie but a goodie. I had forgotten about the Jellicle Cats and Jennyanydots and Bustopher Jones. My other favorite soundtracks, from back in the day, included:

• The Phantom of the Opera (which I had on cassette)
• A Chorus Line (ditto, a recorded copy)
• Les Miserables, of course - any theater kid must
• Guys and Dolls (THE BEST musical of all time, imho)
• Little Shop of Horrors - dream role, Audrey
• Godspell - when I'm feeling spiritually moved
• Into the Woods - dream role, Cinderella, the end makes me cry 
• Sunday in the Park with George - also makes me cry

Maybe I'll listen to a few of those this week, too. The "well-being" challenge this week on the WLC is to listen to music, 1 song a day at least, that "moves you." Pretty fun.

Day to day I typically just listen to Sirius radio in my car, and a lot of times I prefer either the Symphony channel or Spa. Calming. No lyrics to get in the way of thinking. Sometimes I put it on the Broadway channel but I don't know a lot of the more recent stuff that they play. Then, once the kids are in the car, they flip between Hits 1, The Message, and Disney (Kate) or Alt-Nation (Alex). So having music on that's completely my own, my favorites, is somewhat unusual. I haven't really used my iPhone for music, ever. Had ripped all my CDs to iTunes once, 3 computers and an iPod Nano ago. I guess it's mostly lost to that tiny hard drive now; I've thought I should try to charge up the Nano and see what's still there.

Shawn loves to buy music, and still does, although he got us a family subscription to Apple Music last year, and I like it. I just stream whatever I want to hear (like Hamilton), and don't pay anything extra for it. I can't really understand how to "do" music anymore. I know I don't own the things I stream, and I guess I'm okay with that. Shawn also got a record player this year and is getting back into vinyl, which is fun and funny.

What do you listen to?

Edit: I popped back in to say that when it wasn't musicals, what I mostly listened to in my youth (heh) was light alternative (not the real hard grungy stuff, but REM, U2, etc.), acoustic-guitar singer-songwriter types and mainstream pop, and in the '90s I listened to a lot of country. ;) Once I got married I sort-of defaulted to whatever he listened to, because he has good taste in music. Sometimes I do miss my own music, but apparently not enough to do anything about it.

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We have a weird work week with some extra extra curriculars Monday/Tuesday, plus Valentine's Day, and then Kate's birthday on Friday, but here are 2 meals I have planned anyway.

Ranch Chicken Thighs with Rice - But I'm wanting to bake this instead of cooking it entirely in a skillet.

UPDATE: Verdict on this? A good, if a little bland, weeknight meal. I don't think there was a point in marinating the chicken in Ranch dressing; we couldn't taste it at all. Would use Ranch seasoning instead next time, or add garlic and onion powder.

Spaghetti and spaghetti squash with meat sauce - I have decided I'm not a fan of zucchini noodles, but spaghetti squash works. It feels more substantial to me under sauce. With a Caesar salad and garlic toast for the bread-eaters, lucky ducks.

...and here are some recipes I've pinned lately, that I want to try. Maybe you will, too:

This marinade, I did try already, and the fam concluded it was the best pork tenderloin ever. And even though I normally don't love pork tenderloin, I enjoyed it too.

This Pollo in Potacchio is SO not me! Chicken and tomatoes just don't go together, in my mind. But I'm curious about it, and it's compliant. So it's a maybe.

I used to watch Sara Moulton ALL the time when I was a new bride, newly cooking every night. :) Happy memories. This looks pretty yummy, once I'm eating flour again: Salmon Cakes w/Corn.

My lunchbox vs. your lunchbox

Since this blog is mostly private, I feel okay sharing my honest thoughts, and after spending a weekend with 8 other moms, I'm feeling ... I don't know, weird... about What We (Collectively) Pack Our Kids for Lunch. I hope this won't offend anyone.

I think I'm a normal mom, but I know I'm more lenient about food than most moms these days. It was so apparent to me this weekend.

One mom on our trip made a big deal of telling us, "I haven't bought Pop-Tarts since Ana was BORN." She had brought 2 big boxes of them to share because we were all assigned to bring something for breakfasts in the house we rented.

P.S. I make sure we never run out of Pop Tarts at my house.

Another mom, with whom I drove tandemly (is that a word?) made her daughter choose between getting a small soda at one of our road trip stops, or having any dessert after pizza that night.

I'm not trying to be a jerk, but... it's a road trip, isn't it supposed to be fewer rules, and little treats and snacks along the way? Isn't that what makes it fun?

I was just reminded about all of this, reading another mom's post about a school lunch. She wrote, "Seeing what was offered by the school -- chicken nuggets, rice with about 2 pieces of vegetable, chocolate milk (skim, filled with additives), juice, and cookies!? Yeah, we’re going to keep packing lunch for the foreseeable future."

Look, I get it, chicken nuggets are not that healthy, and vegetables are, but... they're kids. That seems like a pretty decent lunch to me. I feel like the school is probably also trying to manage its waste, and if they give a big serving of vegetables, it might all get thrown away. (I mean, I have no idea, I've never cooked for a school.)

So, in her situation, what is she going to put in her kid's lunchbox that's so much better? Kale chips? Carrots and dip, of course, but in my house that would be Ranch dip, not beet hummus (which one mom brought to the house this weekend), because kids don't eat hummus in my experience. Lightly salted nuts/raisins? My kids turn up their noses at the very idea and would trade that for chips if they got the chance. A sandwich cut into stars on 9-grain bread? Sure, go for it, but know that the bread might get peeled off and thrown away, and now you're headed into Bento Box territory, my friend.

I do/did try to make sure my kids have fruit in their lunch if possible (I don't pack Alex's lunch anymore, he's 14). Kate is a fruit lover, so she's all for it, apple slices, grapes, clementines, berries. She'll even do carrots and Ranch once or twice a week, and she loves a good Caesar salad. But otherwise, it's a deli-meat sandwich on Whitewheat bread, chips or crackers (usually chips), 2 cookies, and a drink, which is Gatorade these days, because juice boxes and Capri Suns are too babyish and they don't like plain water. We buy "Fun Food" when we can, and it's pizza with salad, or a burger with chips, or (gasp!) a Chick Fil A sandwich with a Welch's fruit snack. I don't feel bad about it.

I don't know, Kate and I had a talk after our trip and the Pop Tarts comment. I think if you deprive your kids of ALL the yummy snacks, you're setting them up to binge on them when they're finally independent. Freshman 15, anyone? We talk a lot about moderation, and I try to include veggies with dinners most nights, but it's difficult when they only like broccoli, corn and green beans. And while we're at it, my kids eat candy, and sometimes they sneak it up to their rooms and... I don't punish them for it. Do I wish they wouldn't do that? Yeah. Do I think it's worth fussing about? Not really.

Maybe I've got it all wrong, but I guess I'm not planning to change my lunchbox ways. I think we're fine. Guess what? When Alex buys his lunch at the high school cafeteria, he chooses a side of broccoli on purpose, to make sure he gets his vegetables. I just find it interesting that so many moms want other moms to know how very healthy they are.

Review of January, Preview of February

With my new planner I am finding that I want to do monthly reviews, and I've been working on it a little bit this last week of January. Here's what I've concluded about January:

• I accomplished four of my goals: 1. Host a party at our house, 2. Make an appointment with a financial planner and move our accounts to a local branch, 3. Yoga with Adriene's 30-day Dedicate series, and 4. Invite a non-work friend to lunch. 
• As a bonus, we recovered our kitchen chairs. I didn't even speak it as a goal, but it was one, and it got done!
  
  This is a LOT more "accomplishing" than I think I typically do! I don't know if having the planner had anything to do with it, but it makes me feel good at any rate.
  
• I/we did not manage: 1. Buying a new mattress (it was supposed to be our Christmas gift to each other... now it might be our Valentine's gift? Or Anniversary (April)? LOL, we'll get it when we get it, I guess) 2. Getting the cats to a (new?) vet for a yearly checkup. Although, after reading online I'm not sure they actually need one unless they are sick or really too fat for their own good, and I don't think ours are... kinda unsure about it but I also don't recall taking our cat to the vet once a year when I was a kid, so.... maybe I'll let that one go.
• I also did not do as much prayer/meditation time as I have in the recent past (pre-December), and I'll have to work on adding that back in. My quiet mornings at my desk have been supplanted by driving Alex to school on all these cold mornings, lately, instead of him walking to the bus stop (in his HOODIE). It's fine, and I like having time with him for sure, but when I get to my office (late-ish), I feel like I need to skip the excess me-time. So come on, Spring. (I think next week we're supposed to have 70s!)

I am also noticing that the "planning" mindset has me thinking about the future so much, it's hard to be mindful of the present moment, and I would like to do better about that. Interesting.  

In February, I'm looking forward to our Girl Scout Troop's weekend trip to Savannah (today!), having a half-day off for that and for Kate's birthday the 15th, and the Big Project at work being over on the 24th. I'm anxious about Alex having a week-long break from school when the rest of us don't. Not sure how to handle those, and I feel sad that he's probably going to be bored that week. :/

Meals have not been that great, I will say. The Whole Life Challenge is a challenge in that regard. My kids/family don't want to eat butternut squash soup, salads, veggie omelets, or plain chicken breasts, I can't imagine why. I planned next week's dinners super-quickly this morning, since I'm leaving town tonight and won't get to do the grocery shopping (darn). It's a mix-up of our usuals. Tacos, pork chops and field peas, one-sheet meal with sausage and chicken sausage. Easy, but completely unoriginal. Check back next week, maybe it'll be better.

Happiness is a Birthday Party

I hope Shawn enjoyed the birthday party as much as I did, and as much as he deserved to. I think it came off beautifully, thanks to all the help I had from kids, parents, mother-in-law, and the guest of honor himself.

I will admit to a bit of pre-party stress, just wondering how in the world I would get it all done before 6:30 p.m., the published start time. However, I woke up early enough to my yoga workout for the day, and to have coffee/breakfast in relative quiet, and I used that time to Make A List, which was critical. For sure it helped my mood, to start out in a peaceful way. But man, I had everything on that list:

• Publix - pick up cake and deli tray (and other food) 10 a.m.
• call in wings order - 11 a.m.
• yoga
• make taco dip
• make tea
• decorate dining room table
• cut vegetables
• move cats' food and litter box to upstairs bathroom
• sweep hallway
• unload dishwasher
• meatballs in crock pot 3 p.m.
• buy beer, wine, Ranch dip I forgot, and pick up wings - 4 p.m. SHAWN (thank you, honey!)
• makeup/get dressed
• clean bathroom downstairs (whoops, I just realized I never actually did this one)

It was so soothing to check things off the list. Alex went with me to Publix and kept me sane ("Don't you think we need another bag of another kind of chips??" ..."uh, I think we're good, Mom.") Sweet Kate helped me with decorating - she wanted so much to HELP. So I let her write the letters on the Pinterest-y banner (bought from Party City, definitely not crafty enough to make myself!) and it turned out super cute.

 

She also sprinkled confetti on the table after I'd put out the tablecloth, and hung up little golden spiral-y streamers on the ceiling with masking tape. 

After that she kept begging me, from about 2:00 pm until 6:00, to put out the food, and I had to keep fending her off. Bread and cheese do not sit well for that long, I had to tell her. Again. 

The weather was terrible. The coworkers, many of them, were sick and texted to say they couldn't make it after all. We joked that if it was just us 7, well, we'd have a lot of taco dip and beer to enjoy and we'd change back into our comfy pants and fuzzy socks. But then people DID show up, and even brought sweet and funny gifts, and said lovely things and ate some of the food (not all, we have a LOT of food leftover), and drank wine and beer and tea and water and had side conversations and told good stories. 

All in all, I was proud of us, and glad my parents and his mom came in from out of town, and it felt special. I hope it did for him, too. This was a fun moment, and probably a good indication:

Pre-WLC dinners this week, and party planning

It's a week of "Last Suppers" for me, before the Whole Life Challenge begins again next Saturday. Then it will be no bread, no cheese, no sugar for 6 weeks.

Tonight, Monday: Lemon Butter Chicken Strips, rice and broccoli. This is a super-easy, pantry items meal. I've made it once before and the kids even liked it. If I have time I'll throw together some cornbread muffins to accompany this.

Tuesday: Cheeseburgers and potato salad. In the dead of winter, but who cares. We don't have snow like a lot of the country, but it's been cold so a "dreaming of summer/backyard" kind of dinner sounds good.

Wednesday: Lag Liv's Mexican rice with Fritos Scoops. (See? I'm really getting into this celebration of the last junk food of January.) ;)

Thursday: Mini pizzas. I have Canadian bacon and pineapple, which I'm happy to report is Kate's favorite pizza topping. She has good taste.

Friday: Shredded BBQ pork in the crock pot, served on King's Hawaiian rolls with coleslaw and chips, and possibly fruit salad. My parents are due to arrive in town that day, again, because Shawn's 50th birthday party is the following night! My MIL will also be with us, driving up from Savannah. I hope there's enough food! I think there will be.

I have more shopping to do this week. Today, plates, napkins, utensils and other fun things you can find at Party City. I've ordered a deli tray and a cake (decided against cupcakes for fear they were too girly; silly I know, but that's the deal) and the guest list is just about confirmed with 19 attendees including us. Most are from his office, which seems appropriate.

Before on the left, After on the right

In other party prep, this past weekend we recovered our kitchen chairs! They were looking tattered and gross. Happy to report it wasn't a difficult project, once we borrowed a staple gun. If you're ever thinking you could try recovering chairs, you're right. It's easy. Thank you to Shawn for doing the hard work of pulling the thick fabric tightly. I was very impressed with his DIY aplomb and his willingness to go to Joann Fabrics with me. When it was finished, Kate asked, "I guess I can't wipe my hands on them anymore?" NO, darling almost-ELEVEN-year-old, you cannot. smh. (This is the child who's being resistant to attending The Social Class (manners, etiquette, social dance for middleschoolers in our area). Sigh. But she NEEEEEEEDS The Social Class!)

I'm trying to trust that Saturday will all come together as it's meant to, and that I'll be calm and efficient. That morning, Kate has a basketball game across town. Not ideal. I haven't decided if SHE will skip it, but I'm certain I will.

This Week's Wins

Something new... instead of calling out my complaints in the title, let's see if naming it positively shifts my perspective a little. (Oh, don't worry, I'll get my complaints in there, no doubt. Plenty for you to commiserate with, if that's your thing.)

1. First win of the week goes to MONDAY, because the kids went back to school, thank the good Lord. It was time. It was soooooo time. We humans thrive on routine, and my young humans were sorely lacking theirs. Naturally there are screen-time related details. I'm fully conflicted: It's our fault as parents, it's not our fault -- it's not going to kill them, it IS definitely going to kill them, or at least their developing brains -- I am top of it with rules/limits, I HAVE NO IDEA how to set and enforce limits -- he'll be fine and get into college somewhere, he DOESN'T DO ANYTHING BUT THE iPHONE and HE'LL DEFINITELY NEVER GET INTO COLLEGE!! -- et cetera. Today while driving Alex to school, he wasn't on the phone (a minor miracle). But he wasn't talking to me, either. He hardly ever starts the conversation; I always try, but it usually ends with a one-phrase answer. Is this simply because he's a teenage boy and they don't get chatty with their moms, anyway, or has his screen addiction (?!) ruined his ability to start conversations? That's my latest worry. #momlife

back to wins... 

2. Also on Monday, I went to Bed, Bath and Beyond looking for an iced tea/water server, you know the kind, big glass jugs with a spout on the front, in a little twin set? There was only one option, sadly, and it didn't have quite the perfect metal stand for my design taste, nor did it have the Pinterest-worthy chalkboard labels, but I don't have time to quibble and it was something like $29 which seemed like a good price, so I bought that sucker. I am hosting a birthday party in T-minus 9 days and every second counts.

3. Big win on Tuesday, and the accomplishment of one of my 2019 goals -- I had lunch with a friend. The official goal is to invite at least one non-work friend out to lunch each month. Tuesday I went with Jackie, a buddy from church choir, and we ate Mexican food and giggled about gossipy stuff and she told me some deep family stuff she's dealing with, which I felt privileged to know, and so. It was awesome. 

4. I got my car back from repairs. All better. Except it smells severely of new paint. I will not miss my rental car, a Chevy Cruze which was perfectly nice but it had that auto-eco-engine-off feature where the car just shuts off at stop signs or red lights. I know I could have probably cancelled that feature somehow, but I wasn't interested in reading the manual for a car I only had for a few (8) days. It was kind-of interesting, too - dead silence in the middle of a busy road - so I just experienced it. 

5. My company's president (US office only) resigned, after only 2 months on the job. Hahahahahaha! Nothing new at all, happens all the time. Gave us the little shot of office drama that we feel lost without. Ugh. I mean, it's not a win, really, except I guess he wasn't the perfect fit that we (really, truly) thought he was, so in the end it's probably better this way. And it will engender MORE office drama, probably, in the hiring of a new one. Woo hoo!  

6. 9 days of yoga so far! I haven't quit the 30-day program, although today my right wrist was not having it. But that's the beauty of a home practice, as Adriene would say - I can do (or not do) what I want and no one can even see me! Stupid aches and pains. 

7. Sunshine! After weeks upon weeks of grey, misty weather - which I enjoy, don't get me wrong - we have finally had a week of clear skies. Relief! It's nice to not feel like you're in a cocoon, or in a literal fog all day long for days on end.

Framing my memories

Surviving Midnight Mass, the first time for the kids. Singing Lo, How a Rose so well (the choir), and Christmas Communion Song, and Silent Night/Night of Silence (the best we've ever done it, I think). 

Ash and his fresh catnip, on Christmas Eve! Having to hide it immediately after taking it out of its package, AND hide their cat stockings, to prevent a potential crash of the stocking-holders in the middle of the night! Crazy kitty!

The happy feeling of seeing my sister when we arrived to pick her up at the airport.

Christmas dinner, a day after - the turkey was delicious, (cooked in the pan Ashley shared with me so generously), I remembered the cranberry jelly just in time, the dressing had red bell pepper in it, so it was bright and festive, the peppermint martinis were strong (and Jilly was honest about not liking them, which made Mom laugh).

Opening presents. Jilly spreading her books out for all of us to choose and unwrap, and the Theo chocolates. Mom stealing Dad's chocolates and not being one bit sorry about it. Mom's Librarian Super Hero that she read us the entire description of, haha! Kate's gift to Jilly: a YETI tumbler, and Jilly not having one (can't believe that)! Jilly really liking the triathlon necklace Shawn got her.

Shawn squeezing fresh juice from Dad's 3 bags (!) of tangerines using the old Jack Lalanne juicer.

Playing Exploding Kittens and Carcassone at the dining room table. Alex wearing the cone of shame. ;)

Making gumbo all together... then not eating it, and going to Macaroni Grill that night (we ate the gumbo the next night, of course)!

Oh, my goodness, the BEST memory: Playing piano duets with Jilly and laughing our heads off when we messed up so much! Clap, Clap, Clap, Clap while Changing Places. ALSO: Kate joining in to play Skip To My Lou! She did great!

The stupid Aquarium crowds. Ugh!! But at least the dolphin show was amazing enough to make me cry, and the OK Cafe lunch afterwards was delicious and very Southern.

Cherries Jubilee, our family tradition. 

Lots of bad football (none of our teams won) and The Incredible Dr. Pol on TV. ha!

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I write all of this out because I have been focused somewhat on the spaces in between these fun things. I'm not sure why - the responsibility of being the hostess, maybe, or all the dang rain bringing me down! But these things were perfectly lovely and sweet. Treasures.

My goodness, what a happy New Year

Well!

The holidays were a veritable BLINK, weren't they?? I'm sitting here, back at work for reals, on Jan 2nd, and it's all over already!

Thankfully, the days didn't seem to go by quickly when they were happening, just now in retrospect. Mom and Dad arrived on Friday the 21st and are still here (leaving tomorrow, sad face). Jilly arrived on the 26th and left on the 30th; the kids had a dentist appointment this morning and start back with piano lessons tonight, and I suppose it will be good to return to some kind of normal routine soon.

The highlights:

• FOOD: I did, miraculously, have enough energy for hosting and cooking and all, thanks for asking. ;) Our dinner menus were good (I chose The Kitchn's mac and cheese and it was delicious). One unplanned night I made chicken enchiladas, refried beans and a small salad, just using what I had on-hand, and was very proud of that accomplishment. At this point we have nearly exhausted every food supply in the house (we are out of Gatorade, sandwich bread, milk and squeeze butter (don't judge), just to mention a few staples). But we have nearly enough ingredients to make Sloppy Joes tonight. (Thanks, Mom, for making a quick grocery run today for the onion while I'm at work, and for cooking!)
• ACTIVITIES: I was most worried about what we would DO during the break, partly because Jilly was here and 2 years ago when she came, we barely exited the house (rain). We did a little better this time (still with rain): A lunchtime visit to Atlanta's Battery, home of the new Braves' stadium and Wahlbergers, where we had lunch. An Italian dinner at Macaroni Grill that felt special. Also, an ill-fated trip to the GA Aquarium because it was packed to Stupid levels with other people trying to enjoy their days off. Ugh. I am ... not sure I'm glad we went. Glad we made the effort; will know better next time. We did enjoy the dolphin show. We also convinced Kate that Midnight Mass Christmas Eve would be fun. She conceded anyway and we only had to go once that day. Went to a lot of Masses over 2 weeks, though, including yesterday's one for the Holy Day of Obligation (which I normally skip). We have watched a lot of Aerial America, Drain the Oceans, Dr. Pol (Dad's favorite) and football. I finished Pillars of the Earth.
• GIFTS: Everything was well-received, especially Jill's great idea to wrap up all the favorite books she read in 2018 and share them, free-for-all style. Now I have about 8 new things to read, woo hoo, without even trying! She brought the Michelle Obama bio, for one thing, and Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine, which I've already started and love so far. I also got a Keurig! Fun!
• ACCIDENTS: Just one. I stupidly backed my car into Mom and Dad's, forgetting it was in the driveway on their 2nd night here. Gah. My car is in the shop this week and theirs will go as soon as they get home, and my insurance will cover the brunt of it. I was so grateful to have hit the car of someone who loves me, and not a stranger. These things happen I guess. It does make you feel real dumb, though.
• NEW YEAR'S: I feel completely inadequate for New Year's. I don't know why it seems like I should have matching plates/napkins and streamers and noisemakers, and happy board-gaming until midnight and a festive atmosphere... but that's how I feel ... and that's NOT how we generally do it. By that time, I'm usually tapped out on ideas and energy I guess. We did stay awake, all of us, and we played Dos, by the makers of Uno and watched (boring) football... and had champagne/ginger ale to toast. But otherwise I'm beating myself up a little for not making it special enough. I mean, we'd had the same plate of cookies out for a week by New Year's, we just refilled it every so often. Kinda anti-climactic. Maybe next year I need to have a special dessert, I don't know. Even yesterday, our New Year's Day dinner felt more like a regular weeknight supper although it did include lucky black-eyed peas. Oh well. Can't win 'em all. 

I'm so grateful for my parents making the trip up here. One thing I want to resolve in 2019 is to make more effort to visit THEM this year (and my MIL). 

Other things: 

• I've started Dedicate, Yoga with Adriene's 30-day January plan. Got up at 5am today to begin, and glad about it.
• The Whole Life Challenge starts on 1/19 and I'll be doing that with Mom, woo hoo for healthy habits and a food re-boot.
• I'm planning Shawn's party - the Evite goes out today! 

This is already super long so no review this year. 2018 was really good: I accomplished a lot and learned a lot, and I'm ready to bid it good-bye and start fresh. Hope you are, too! xx

Ham Revelation

I've been trying to think about our menus for this Holiday Week since I'm hosting and having guests. I mean, FAMILY guests, and ones who want us to all relax and not feel stressed, but still... I have a built-in desire to impress even my own Mom and Dad (especially them), and to create happy memories of Christmas in the hearts of my children and husband. And include all the correct holiday traditions but not overdose on them, you know? And have it feel somewhat fancy and special, but not overly dramatic... so... no pressure.

:)

One thing that bugs me about having a "tradition" of serving a holiday meal to many, many guests -- because that was always my own family's tradition, both in Texas and in Florida -- is that at my own house we never have many, many guests. Serving a turkey AND a ham are truly overkill for a table of 6, two of whom are small-appetited kids. My solution to this:

Ham on Christmas Eve. Turkey/dressing on Christmas Day. BOOM.

Here's how I think this weekend is going to go.

Friday Dinner -- (21st, the day Mom and Dad arrive) -- Happy Hour, appetizers for dinner. Meaning: Cheeses and Crackers, maybe Smoked Salmon, and maybe some veggies. There's a neighborhood dessert party that I both want and don't want to attend, but will plan on attending (Shawn rightly said, "We have to go to these things, so that we continue to get invited to them." True.) Even though it's a Friday night after a LONG week and before a very busy long weekend. Anyway. We'll go for an hour-ish. I plan to take my Granny's Sand Tarts as my dessert contribution.

Saturday Dinner -- Undecided but my only two tasks for Saturday are 1) Pick up the Honey Baked Ham I pre-ordered, and 2) Get the rest of the Groceries for Christmas Eve/Day. The rest of the day I want to lay around reading and/or wrap the last of the gifts, and I hope that is OK with my family. Let's just assume we're going to order Chinese food and we'll see what happens. ;)

Sunday Dinner -- never mind, I don't know this yet. (Nor any breakfasts or lunches, you might have noticed.)

MONDAY Christmas Eve Dinner -- Honey Baked Ham! Homemade Mac and Cheese -- I may do two versions, one "regular" one that has become a weeknight standard (just milk, butter, salt, and sliced American cheese), and one fancy one, like this from The Kitchn, or maybe this one. I kinda want to do green bean casserole too....too much creamy rich food? Maybe too much. And a light (!) green salad because we must, for our health's sake.

Probably will have a cookie plate for dessert, with coffee so we can make it to Midnight Mass!

(Oh yes, I want to drag my family to Midnight Mass this year. I already have complaints so we will see what happens. I am ... not very hopeful, although I have to be there to sing. After eating loads of cheese. Awesome.)

Tuesday Christmas Morning Breakfast -- My tradition is to make crepes after all the presents have been opened. Usually I serve it with fruit salad, probably also leftover ham, and sometimes with Christmas punch.

Tuesday Christmas Dinner -- (presumably after eating a big breakfast, we won't need lunch) -- Turkey and Dressing, mashed potatoes and gravy, Caesar salad, roasted broccoli/sweet potatoes. I think...? I don't know if it's fancy enough. I know. We'll serve Wine!

- Should we fry the turkey or roast it? (Fry it! Yum. Is that possible? Can I get enough peanut oil at Publix?)
- Should we postpone this dinner until Wednesday, actually, after my sister arrives?

I am clearly planning to have tons of energy for all this cooking! Hopefully some of it can be made ahead... and I know I will have help, if only I can ask for/accept it. Hard to do in my own kitchen, but it's more festive if we're ALL IN THIS TOGETHER!

I love you, Mom and Dad, Kids and Sister and especially Husband! Forgive me in advance for my mood over those four days (just in case).

TGIF for the holidays

It's not really a stressful week unless I complain about it on my blog, so here goes: It's been A Week.

• One of the main reasons that this week finally got to me, yesterday (a Thursday), is that of course, I let any notion of exercise completely drop. First. The first thing I do is stop doing 10 minutes of exercise and 10 minutes of stretching. If I'm going to feel stressy, I am going to Go For The Gold of stressy and not even help myself. Duh.
• It hasn't been THAT much worse than our regular weeks, honestly. The kids have had after-school activities on T/W/Th of every week this semester. This week we added in an Alex band rehearsal Monday afternoon (requiring pickup), basketball team photos Tuesday at 5, concert Tuesday night, a holiday dinner for my office last night, and Kate's Christmas program tonight. Okay, well, maybe that is a lot of additional stuff. But we managed it fine, really, swapping pick-ups and drop-offs and what-not. I don't know why it felt so HEAVY. It just all happened in the same week, that's what.
• The weather's been crappy, that's another thing. When it is below 30 degrees, I don't feel right making Alex walk to the bus stop, call me crazy. (I WOULD, if the kid would WEAR HIS COAT, but he won't.) And it isn't a huge deal to drop him off at school, but it does push back my work-arrival time a little, which makes me eeeeek. I don't know why, no one cares but me.
• There's been a bit of hurried Christmas-gift-getting at the lunch-hours when I can get out, and the traffic on the street between my suburban office building and the shopping area is Stupid Traffic. I have been able to get most of what I need -- haha, "need", so that the kids have 8 gifts each from Mr. Claus and a few from "us" (does Kate still actually believe or not? The world may never know) -- and also to the UPS store twice, to ship packages to the family we won't see this year. I love the UPS store for how easy they make it, by packing AND shipping, but they do charge an arm and a leg, sheesh. 
• Work. I do actually have a lot of work to do right now, and it's the very definition of soul-sucking: I'm rewriting old website articles and basically keyword-stuffing them. It makes me sad to produce such ugly prose but I am being directed to by one of the 7 agencies that our boss has contracted with, to tell us everything we do wrong. Basically. Anyway, the days are FULL with trying to get all those articles re-worked before our Dec. 14 deadline. Oh, hello, it is today.
• At least I skipped choir this week. Did myself one favor. 
• I also made Kate skip singing in the children's choir at all this year, because I couldn't fathom how to fit it into the schedule. She told me the other day that her choir-friends have solos for Christmas. (And she doesn't.) So now I feel really bad about that, when I was just trying to practice SELF-CARE.

Oh well. It's nearly over. I'm ready for a reset with 8 days off in a row. I can think about holiday menus next week maybe! :)

For S., and because it's different this time, for once

This week's dinner rotation:

Sunday: Chicken Bacon Ranch Pasta (I like to call this "chicken spaghetti" instead, because the other recipe commonly known as "chicken spaghetti," to me, is actually "chicken tetrazini.") I used angel hair because that's what we had on hand. Served with green beans and everyone loved it.

Monday: Oven-Fried Chicken Cutlets, roasted sweet potatoes and broccoli. Yes, I know it's chicken two nights in a row, but I'm not sorry. Chicken is still Alex's "favorite food;" not prepared a certain way, just... chicken. (I don't get it.) I can't find the recipe online but it's simple: you mix 1 tbsp Dijon mustard, 1/3 cup melted butter, S&P and garlic powder in one shallow bowl, then crushed up Ritz crackers + 1/2 c. grated parmesan in the other. Dredge thin chicken cutlets in one, then the other, and bake at 400* for 25 minutes. So good! 

Tuesday: Planning on a silly little Tater Tots casserole that seems like it comes straight from the '70s. I'll pair it with a spinach salad to make us feel better about our choices. 

Wednesday: It's gonna be make-your-own mini pizzas, I believe. Yummy! Pizza is good any day.

Thursday: (I can't for the life of me remember what I wrote down for Thursday.) Oh wait, it was regular chili. Because it's cold outside! This is a staple for us year-round, though -- we serve it over rice, with Saltines usually. Possibly cornbread this week. I didn't grow up eating chili regularly, but DH did and it's his favorite. We make it very simply with a McCormick's seasoning packet, 2 cans tomato sauce, 1 can kidney beans, and a pound of ground beef/turkey. 

Friday is a perfect day/night for tomato soup and grilled cheese and I can't wait for that.

Pretty soon it's going to be time to plan all the Christmas menus...meals to serve house guests! Yay!

Just Say No to Meetings (Yes to Parties)

There is a sales meeting happening in my company this week and for the first time in a really long time, I am NOT attending! Woot! I have so much work to do here. I am not in sales, but marketing does indeed crossover with sales, so typically I am required to go, when it is held here in our U.S. headquarters city. However, this year they decided to travel to Orlando, and to keep the office staff travelers to a minimum, and that is FINE by ME. 

I also just declined a January meeting of the global marketing team, which will be held in Germany. WHY would I do that, you ask? I mean, free trip to Germany! I'll tell you why: the meeting is scheduled for the day of my Dear Husband's 50th birthday. And I am a loving wife. (It also happens to be a company holiday and who wants to work on a free day off??)

It's not that Shawn cares, actually -- he's told me several times that "it's just another day." But I care. Last time I went to Germany, I left town on Alex's birthday -- what is it with this company and my family's special days?! I hated leaving that day (although I feel like we might have had cake the night before, and he opened presents that morning before I left), but husband's 50th, I mean... that's a significant milestone. A few years back, he planned a very sweet surprise 40th birthday party for me, and I want to plan a party for him this year. I haven't done that since he turned 35 (!), because kids. Yes, we always celebrate adult birthdays as a family, but I'm setting a goal this year to host more dinners at our house anyway, so this is going to be the first one of Q1, 2019. 

Does Shawn even want a party? He says he doesn't need one, but if it were me, I think I'd want someone to have a to-do for me on my 50th. And besides, I know he ENJOYS a good party, if it isn't too much trouble to get there (check) and he has people to talk to (check, it will only be people he likes)! So I say it's a go.

I'm thinking about the Saturday before his Monday birthday, maybe late afternoon until ? -- and an all-appetizers, all-party-foods kind of menu. I'm very excited about that, and one of the things I've put into my new planner is a list of food ideas. Jalepeno poppers, chips and dips, wings, shrimp if I'm going "fancy." 

Here's where input would be helpful: 

• Should I do a cake, or cupcakes? Cupcakes would be infinitely easier if I could get them (make them?) fancy enough... (aaaaand I just opened another tab and clicked on Pinterest. I see a new Board in my future) 
• Should we have one special drink, or perhaps a vodka bar (his favorite spirit) with mixer options? Is that even a thing? I've seen bourbon bars, but not vodka.
• Do I have the right serving space for a vodka bar? 
• What will we do about kids? Should other people's kids be invited? Maybe not? But will their parents be offended if our kids are there? 
• I suppose I should take Christmas down before this party on Jan 19th... will we be able to manage that and clean the house?! Ha!

Well, I have a while, yet. A short while, and a busy one, with Christmas -- and guests at our house, yay! -- in the mix. Wish me luck.

Letting some thoughts flow

I probably have nothing to say but I feel like writing something, writing, writing, writing. To get it all out of my system. Get what out? I don't know. Cobwebs.

Yesterday was a really great day, for simple reasons. I:

• Had a 7:00 am global meeting -- am always allowed to do those from home -- but then it had technical difficulties so I didn't even end up attending it.
• Had a 9:15 am orthodontist appointment for Alex, so I hung out at home after the non-meeting. I rearranged one shelf in my dishes cabinet for easier access, and I petted my kittehs.
• Didn't have to do a single thing at the orthodontist, not even pay (we paid our full amount already and this was just a retainer check); I read magazines and Twitter.
• Voted! With Alex in tow, I went right after the orthodontist to the polls, waiting in line about 45 minutes with kind people, hopefully imparted to Alex the importance of his future votes, and voted without the usual internal struggle of choosing the lesser of 2 evils. 
• Put dinner in the crock pot (pork butt, for pulled pork later) and made my delicious lunch (a turkey/salami roll-up with lettuce and pepperocinis, yum).
• Finally, after essentially the entire morning off, went to the office. Half-days are the best days. :) 
• Had lots of proofreading work to do (my favorite kind - it's low-stress and high-result).
• Showed the CEO, who happens to be in town, a letter I wrote for her -- i.e., it will have her signature under it -- and she approved. Was very kind, in fact, and complimentary. And she gave me a hug. 
• Served the slow-cooked pork on slider buns with tater tots and salad. *Angels sang.*
• Watched "Manifest" with the family. It's fairly cheesy, but the kids like it. 
• Fell asleep while the election results started rolling in. 

It was nice, noticing throughout the day what a pleasant day I was having.

Today I have more proofreading to do, which will allow me to keep looking at election results most of the day since our GA races aren't fully decided yet. Plus, it's Wednesday, which is Shan and my regular lunch day. What will we eat? Mexican food? Sushi? Salads? There's so much possibility. ;) Tonight is a leftovers night at home, and then choir practice, which I want to skip but probably won't, because I'm reliable like that. We're starting Advent music, and singing Lo, How a Rose E're Blooming, one of my favorites. 

If you asked me "How are you?" today, I would say, "I can't complain," and really mean it. 

Planner planner planner! Excitement!

After reading all of SHU's careful reviews, and getting more and more curious about what setting goals would actually look like (what are ...goals?...) I have just clicked "Place Order" on a 2019 Golden Coil planner that I customized. I am so excited!

Really, what I like about SHU (Sarah Hart-Unger)'s goal-setting is the reflection afterwards. She sets yearly, monthly, quarterly (or quintile, this past year) goals, and then looks back to see how she did. Somehow she does this without judging herself as harshly as I usually do. That's why I stepped away from setting goals, years ago. I got too discouraged if they weren't met. But she's got me hoping maybe I could do it again, more gently. 

I've long used a notebook at work, for note-taking during meetings; for years, it was also my weekly to-do list. This year I switched to Outlook Tasks for work to-dos. I like it. And I think I've said that Shawn and I use shared Google calendars very successfully to plan our parenting lives -- I'll still use both of those online tools.

But I do love a paper planner. In fact, I was a Franklin-Covey user when that system was popular. I remember the actual store in Lenox Mall. Also, my Mom has forever used a desk planner/calendar and I loved it so much I used the same system in college (At-a-Glance Weekly). So this will be fun.

Maybe I'll do some planning/goal-setting during my first hour of work, when I'm typically doing stuff like that anyway. Maybe I'll carry it around with me in my purse and it will become my go-to. Maybe it will inspire me to work on improving my penmanship (one of my first Goals, actually)! (It has gotten even worse as the years have gone by. Sorry, Sister Anne-Mary. I also legitimately blame carpal tunnel.)

I think I'm also excited because it was a little gift to myself. I'm not always good at buying THINGS that are just for me. I see them as extravagances that I don't need. So this feels nice. It feels like self-care. Kindness.

Taking My Medicine

I was taking my 10-minute work-day walk just now -- gotta do it even if I'm not wearing running shoes -- and trying to encourage myself to take it every day, like medicine. What will we call it?

• malaise medicine, where malaise is just like 'asthma' so the meds are indeed necessary
• brain medicine, because a daily dose really does keep my brain from getting too squirrelly, if I'm consistent
• smile medicine, because it makes it easier to do so
• joy medicine, because I'm on a quest for joy

I suppose any of those will work. :) I forget to take it all the time, though. 

I'm feeling good today. I have a new sweater, because this past weekend, Saturday night in fact, I had uninterrupted shopping time all by myself at a department store. !!! And it was really quiet in there  because it was a Saturday night. I tried on things and bought two tops, two pairs of jeans, and a new purse I'm in love with. New purses are THE BEST. My only complaint about the trip was that I saw a mother-daughter duo in there together, showing each other cute things, and I wished my mom and I could shop together regularly. Darn me for moving to Georgia all those years ago.

Speaking of mother-daughter, shopping Not-with-Kate is also THE BEST. God bless her. I'd like to suspend shopping with her until she is a working adult and can afford her own stuff. Then, Shopping Dates, sure. Yesterday, on an errands-run to Target, she got a kick out of pushing my buttons just because. She knows I get frustrated when she stops at EVERY display and says, "Ooh, look, Mom, we NEED one of these (random useless things we do not need)!" She did it once or twice for real (she needs a new watch! (ok, fine.) She needs a new pencil case! (no she does not)) and then once or twice as a joke. Finally, I caught on. She told me later it's fun to mess with me. GIRL.  !!!

---- 

We're on Pain Watch 2018. Carpal tunnel, I believe, so it's Tingly Wrists but also Left Elbow this time. I can't turn my palms up with a straight arm, without pain. I've been on regular ibuprofin since last Thursday, and it's not helping much. Tonight begins a wrist-brace regimen while I sleep. (Remember when? Check out that baby belly and that old-school camera!) And no downward dogs. Sob! It is hard to do yoga without using your wrists/hands. Argh. Getting Old Sucks. 

----

Work has been better, I think. A big project -- our yearly magazine -- is going quite well; somehow the words have come just when I needed them to. In one instance, the article I couldn't feel inspired to write was miraculously replaced with a different article I wasn't aware was coming. Serendipity. There has been plenty of work to fill my days, so they seem to go by faster. We're not having High Drama, although that's always a possibility. And today I was informed I got a 2% raise and a year-end bonus (tiny, but still). 

All in all, a pretty good start to Halloween week. A neighborhood party to look forward to... I'm making hot-dogs in mummy-wraps (crescent dough) and I have a new witch hat to wear. I also bought the good candy (Reese's, Skittles, Airheads, Smarties, M&Ms)... You?

Things about Alex that bring me J O Y

His sweet temperament and personality. His gentleness.

When he dances or dabs after making the perfect comment.

That he's so self-reliant and responsible.

How he loves his kitties so much and just wants what's best for them.

How he handles all his allergies without much complaint.

His handsome face. He is and has always been such a good-looking kid. (I know biology makes me biased.) ;)

His ability to remember things he's studied and read. His mind. 

His quiet nature.

His desire that everyone just do the right thing, himself included.

How he's handling high school, with all its newness, as it comes. 

His loyalty to and friendship with Brandon.

That he goes at his own pace and knows his limits.

That he's stepped out of his comfort zone to try the rock climbing club, mostly because we made him pick SOMETHING, but that he chose this one, not the one we suggested. ;)

That he'll discuss good books with me. 

That I can use bad language around him now, and it doesn't phase him. (Not that I do it very much, but you know. When we watch a video and the f-bomb is dropped, it's okay.) Teens for the win.

That he's being cautious in high school, where kids are sometimes doing dangerous/questionable things like vaping and Juul pods. 

When he works really hard at a piano piece and wants to get it right.

That he's so sensitive to my feelings. 

That he is HELPFUL and if we ask for his help, he willingly gives it.

That he's frugal and wise about money.

That he'll still jump on the trampoline or shoot baskets with his sister.

He doesn't always understand her, but he tells her he loves her every night before bed.